Apparently bad. since moving in last saturday, I found one dead in the living room, alive in a closet (Now dead), one skittering out of the garag (Now dead), and I guess Ezio killed one while I was at work today cause...yeah, it was dead when we found it.
Anyway - I don't fucking hablar with some arachnids, so I need a way TO MERCILESSLY ERADICATE THEM. I will say this - it's a new subdivision, and I live in texas - so I know that complete elimination is probably not possible - but I'm all about EXTREME discouragement. We have funnel-web type spiders around the outside of the house and I was HOPING that they would...you know...predatorize the damned things but clearly I need to rain pure hellfire in order to get rid of them.
Background: We gots us pillbugs. Lots of them. They stay outside, but I suspect the scorpions are feeding on the near endless supply of them and getting bolder. Perhaps coming in the house looking for more.
Please help, por favor.
Yo, I got scorpions.
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General Zod
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Contact a professional.
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ShadowDragon8685
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Contact a professional.
Failing that, move out, with or without literally raining hellfire on the building in order to be sure none of them survive.
Move somewhere cold. Very, very cold. Scorpions don't like the cold.
Failing that, move out, with or without literally raining hellfire on the building in order to be sure none of them survive.
Move somewhere cold. Very, very cold. Scorpions don't like the cold.
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Way to overwork a metaphor Shadow. I feel really creeped out now.
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spartasman
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Get an exterminator?
Get a BIGGER scorpion to fight the rest to the death?
Travel to the land of the Scorpion King, and there doth challenge him?
But seriously, call an exterminator.
Get a BIGGER scorpion to fight the rest to the death?
Travel to the land of the Scorpion King, and there doth challenge him?
But seriously, call an exterminator.
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Simon_Jester
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
So, not being satisfied with fucking you over on the paperwork, then fucking you over again, and again... they built the house in the wrong place. And now you've got a plague of scorpions.
Man. Let this be a lesson to me. Never buy a house, if I do buy a house make sure it's a house that already exists, and try to cover as many angles as humanly possible in advance.
Man. Let this be a lesson to me. Never buy a house, if I do buy a house make sure it's a house that already exists, and try to cover as many angles as humanly possible in advance.
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The Spartan
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Stomp on a few and leave their corpses where the others can see them.
They'll start toeing the line...
They'll start toeing the line...
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Soy un perdedor.
"WHO POOPED IN A NORMAL ROOM?!"-Commander William T. Riker
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Burn the house down, collect the insurance money and move to where there ain't any scorpions. Actually don't do that, at least not until things are so bad that you're ready to slit your wrists or go on a shooting rampage.
Get an exterminator and bill it to your lawsuit against the homebuilder and bank. Don't forget to claim stress, psychological harm, and the associated income & medical costs.
Get an exterminator and bill it to your lawsuit against the homebuilder and bank. Don't forget to claim stress, psychological harm, and the associated income & medical costs.
Lusankya: Deal!
Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
General Zod wrote:Contact a professional.
Fuck off. Give me an internet toughguy/mom's homescorpion remedy at least. This IS the internet, after all.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
The Spartan wrote:Stomp on a few and leave their corpses where the others can see them.
They'll start toeing the line...
Funny thing is - I TOTALLY did that to the one in the garage. I smashed him with a beer bottle, then skewered him on a toothpick and stuck it in the ground outside. I smell defiance - and I don't like that smell.
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Make a kabab out of them like Les Stroud the Survivorman.
Caution: Remove poisonous parts if any of the scorpion.
Caution: Remove poisonous parts if any of the scorpion.
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Exactly! And look on the bright side, when the 2012 Zombie Apocalypse takes place you'll have a home grown source of food & protein! Home grown, I crack myself up some days.Soontir C'boath wrote:Make a kabab out of them like Les Stroud the Survivorman.
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General Zod
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Have you considered a DIY flamethrower?Chardok wrote:General Zod wrote:Contact a professional.
Fuck off. Give me an internet toughguy/mom's homescorpion remedy at least. This IS the internet, after all.
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
J wrote:Exactly! And look on the bright side, when the 2012 Zombie Apocalypse takes place you'll have a home grown source of food & protein! Home grown, I crack myself up some days.Soontir C'boath wrote:Make a kabab out of them like Les Stroud the Survivorman.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Just go around the house every night or two with a black light and a can of death-spray (or a shoe). This rapidly diminishes the population, and it's kind of fun. That's how we dealt with them in Phoenix.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
If you haven't got any pets then I suggest putting down poison; there's bound to be somewhere that'll sell the right stuff.
Although personally I wouldn't mind as long as the scorpions aren't dangerously venomous and are eating the rest of the bugs. Think of them as really badass spiders.
Although personally I wouldn't mind as long as the scorpions aren't dangerously venomous and are eating the rest of the bugs. Think of them as really badass spiders.
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Replace "ginger" with "n*gger," and suddenly it become a lot less funny, doesn't it?
-- fgalkin
Like my writing? Tip me on Patreon
I Have A Blog
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Zaune wrote:If you haven't got any pets then I suggest putting down poison; there's bound to be somewhere that'll sell the right stuff.
Although personally I wouldn't mind as long as the scorpions aren't dangerously venomous and are eating the rest of the bugs. Think of them as really badass spiders.
Hate spiders. Have cats. At least one is a scorpion-killer. And again - I don't El-jive-o with arachnids, brah.
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Wing Commander MAD
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Step 1: Look up a critter that eats scorpions and import a supply of them.
Step 2: Wait.
Step 3: When/if the new predator population booms out of control find what eats them and import it.
Step 4: Repeat above steps as needed.
I believe this is the basic plot of an episode of The Simpsons. If it worked for Springfield surely it'll work for you too, especially since it wasn't one of Homer's ideas.
Step 2: Wait.
Step 3: When/if the new predator population booms out of control find what eats them and import it.
Step 4: Repeat above steps as needed.
I believe this is the basic plot of an episode of The Simpsons. If it worked for Springfield surely it'll work for you too, especially since it wasn't one of Homer's ideas.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
I'm actually going to get one of those UVLED flashlights and go hunting at night. Also - I'll be importing something what eats pillbugs that isn't a scorpion.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Nuke the site from orbit.Chardok wrote:Fuck off. Give me an internet toughguy/mom's homescorpion remedy at least. This IS the internet, after all.General Zod wrote:Contact a professional.
It's the only way to be sure.
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Sea Skimmer
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Scorpions like to have concealment; what is the yard like? Get rid of anything near the house a scorpion might hide under or around. Get more scorpion eating cats if possible. They also make poison sprays specifically for scorpion repulsion and annihilation you can use around the perimeter of the structure.
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— Field Marshal William Slim 1956
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Ok then, just drown everything outside in Malathion. Go to your local Home Depot or garden supply store and buy a couple gallons of Malathion concentrate. Mix it to spec and pour it all over everything outside your home.Chardok wrote:Fuck off. Give me an internet toughguy/mom's homescorpion remedy at least. This IS the internet, after all.
Lusankya: Deal!
Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
Get large spiders (tarantulas), more cats and/or chicken.
Do not get them together.
Or, just call an exterminator.
Do not get them together.
Or, just call an exterminator.
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A decision must be made in the life of every nation at the very moment when the grasp of the enemy is at its throat. Then, it seems that the only way to survive is to use the means of the enemy, to rest survival upon what is expedient, to look the other way. Well, the answer to that is 'survival as what'? A country isn't a rock. It's not an extension of one's self. It's what it stands for. It's what it stands for when standing for something is the most difficult! - Chief Judge Haywood
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Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
If you're going to do-it-yourself with poisons, make sure not to sicken Ezio along with the scorpions. You gotta keep your arachnid assassinating kitty healthy.
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SDNW4 Nation: The Refuge And, on Nova Terra, Al-Stan the Totally and Completely Honest and Legitimate Weapons Dealer and Used Starship Salesman slept on a bed made of money, with a blaster under his pillow and his sombrero pulled over his face. This is to say, he slept very well indeed.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
If you keep doing this long enough you'll end up with, say, a single alligator which can be easily removed.Wing Commander MAD wrote:Step 1: Look up a critter that eats scorpions and import a supply of them.
Step 2: Wait.
Step 3: When/if the new predator population booms out of control find what eats them and import it.
Step 4: Repeat above steps as needed.
I believe this is the basic plot of an episode of The Simpsons. If it worked for Springfield surely it'll work for you too, especially since it wasn't one of Homer's ideas.
Re: Yo, I got scorpions.
That really depends on how big and how mean said alligator is.Sriad wrote:If you keep doing this long enough you'll end up with, say, a single alligator which can be easily removed.