Silly things you want to do, but can't

[Davey]

I want to organize an Imperial Guard or Imperial Stormtrooper march through my college campus someday, completely unannounced. I've actually been working on patterns to make plastic flak armour and lasguns and stormtrooper armour and blaster carbines, but the problem is I just don't have enough volunteers.

[Count Chocula]

Pick my nose in our weekly Sales meeting and wipe it under the table, then pull up the sales numbers showing our TOP salesman tracking for 80% of goal. Then ask why I bother supporting them.

[aerius]

There was some guy making truly hideous sounds in the toilet stall at my work today. I was sorely tempted to yell "POLICE! OPEN UP THE DOOR AND PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR!!" while banging real hard on the stall, and then running away.

[J]

Acts of Violence, jumping up and shouting/screaming in the middle of a crowded room or lecture, arguing or shouting out incorrect points in lectures by (senior and very important people), thinking of ripping my shirt off and running out of the room, etc'.
Quite regularly.

I've always had an incessant need to dropkick people at the most random time.

You know, I'm not a qualified psychologist or anything, but it seems to me you two have some serious unresolved anger issues...

[phred]

You know, I'm not a qualified psychologist or anything, but it seems to me you two have some serious unresolved anger issues...

No, its a guy thing.

A couple of my friends and I used to go to random fast food joints, and while one of us was at the drive thru window the rest of us would run up drag him out of the car and pretend to beat the carp out of him. it had mixed results, but was always entertaining

Edit: messed the tags up

[Schuyler Colfax]

Acts of Violence, jumping up and shouting/screaming in the middle of a crowded room or lecture, arguing or shouting out incorrect points in lectures by (senior and very important people), thinking of ripping my shirt off and running out of the room, etc'.
Quite regularly.

I've always had an incessant need to dropkick people at the most random time.

You know, I'm not a qualified psychologist or anything, but it seems to me you two have some serious unresolved anger issues...

You did not just compare what Death said to what I said. He comes off as crazy in that post, I just seem weird.

[Nephtys]

I've always wanted to put on some weird outfit. Like, some sorta totally out of place peice of clothing, such as perhaps a reflective safety vest, goggles, etc. Then run up to someone asking "...what year is this?! What's the date?!" then when they tell me, I look awed and murmur "..Mygod... there's still time!" and run off.

[Davey]

I've always wanted to put on some weird outfit. Like, some sorta totally out of place peice of clothing, such as perhaps a reflective safety vest, goggles, etc. Then run up to someone asking "...what year is this?! What's the date?!" then when they tell me, I look awed and murmur "..Mygod... there's still time!" and run off.

Ha ha ha, good to see more people out there know about "Pretend To Be A Time Traveller Day!"

[Crazedwraith]

You did not just compare what Death said to what I said. He comes off as crazy in that post, I just seem weird.

SC... Please. Don't be "That Guy"

Althogh In my case. I've been carrying about my geological cross section on a rolled up A1 piece of graph paper, and when wandering around campus I have this dreadful urge to bop people of the head with it in passing.

[J]

I've always wanted to put on some weird outfit. Like, some sorta totally out of place peice of clothing, such as perhaps a reflective safety vest, goggles, etc. Then run up to someone asking "...what year is this?! What's the date?!" then when they tell me, I look awed and murmur "..Mygod... there's still time!" and run off.

That sounds like a great idea! I'll definitely have to try it out soon, though I think my husband could pull it off better since he looks like more of dork. Hmmm...

[aerius]

Whenever I'm at a wedding I get this really irrational urge vocally object to the marriage during the vows. I don't know why. But I wanna scream "dont do it" even though I actually like the couple.

I've been tempted to do that too. At a close friend's wedding I really wanted to scream "NOOOOOO!!!!" when the pastor got to the part that goes "speak now or forever hold your peace".

[Anguirus]

Take a whole week off.

[Durandal]

One thing I've wanted to do for a while now is go down to the local Scientology center and picket outside, but with utterly silly signs. Like "What if Xenu was aborted?" and "It's a thetan, not a choice."

Come to think of it, there's really no reason I couldn't do it.

[darthdavid]

Spend a period of time roaming across the country, rambling where my feet carry me and surviving through odd jobs and ingenuity.

Of course I'd probably not last a week living the life of a drifter and it would no doubt be a lot less fun outside the romanticized world of my brain, but it's fun to imagine...

[Flameblade]

I want to organize an Imperial Guard or Imperial Stormtrooper march through my college campus someday, completely unannounced. I've actually been working on patterns to make plastic flak armour and lasguns and stormtrooper armour and blaster carbines, but the problem is I just don't have enough volunteers.

You might want to check out Improv Everywhere
That sort of stunt is right up their alley.

[J]

A friend sent me pictures of the toga party we attended in university, now I have an urge to wear a toga to work. I already have leather sandals so all I need to do now is sew together a toga and show up at work as a Roman. Unfortunately the historically aware will accuse me of being a prostitute...

[Darth Wong]

I'd love to spray-paint "Asshole" on the hoods of the cars I see illegally parked in the handicapped spots and fire lanes at the local shopping plaza. Unfortunately, the whole "that's illegal too" thing gets in the way.

[kc8tbe]

My brother and I went to a Quiznos once right after a school play in which he had played a British character. He ordered a sandwich using lines from the play, and I "translated" in an exaggerated Israeli accent.

"I would like one that is sturdy, sensible, and brown."
"Ehhhh, he means zat he wants his sandwich toasted on ze whole wheat bread."

The sad thing was, the manager actually thought we were from across the pond and proceeded to offer us free food.

[Lord Relvenous]

Similar to DW's, but key it into the sides of their car. Another one: run away from the cops when I get pulled over.

However, it seems like whenever I have an idea pop into my head that would be horribly inappropriate socially, I get an intense brief flash of embarrassment or other similar emotions, as if I had actually carried out my thought. The feeling can sometimes be very intense, approaching nausea, but is luckily always extremely short-lived (talking about under a second). Anyone else get this?

Edited for clarity.

[Edi]

I'd love to spray-paint "Asshole" on the hoods of the cars I see illegally parked in the handicapped spots and fire lanes at the local shopping plaza. Unfortunately, the whole "that's illegal too" thing gets in the way.

The next best thing you could do is print "I'm an asshole" or "I'm an asshole who can't park" in big font on a large paper, take a stack of those with you and slip them under the windshield wipers. No damage, hence not illegal, but guaranteed to piss the offending fuckwits off anyway.

[K. A. Pital]

The next best thing you could do is print "I'm an asshole" or "I'm an asshole who can't park" in big font on a large paper, take a stack of those with you and slip them under the windshield wipers. No damage, hence not illegal, but guaranteed to piss the offending fuckwits off anyway.

The Russian police recently started stacking papers with "I'm a stupid who can't park" and "Please, give me parking lessons" into the cars of those who park in designated spots or park atrociously against the rules, like on driving lanes, etc. It's funny.

[NomAnor15]

Right about 1:20

While I wouldn't be driving drunk, it would be fun to pull this on a cop. Until the going to jail part. That would be less fun.

[The Grim Squeaker]

Have a real, honest talk with some of the people I work with, or meet, and to tell them just what I know and think about certain issues or ideologies they might privately have.

The term "court martial" springs to mind .

[The Yosemite Bear]

Walking through a foreign city, talking in a really exaggerated version of the locals' accent. It was brilliant fun in Glasgow, but I haven't dared do it anywhere else. People look at you funny.

I call shenanigans sir! As a regular visitor to Glasgow I know it is impossible to exaggerate the Glaswegian accent any more than the locals already do. It's a can of Carlsberg Special Brew from being a different language.

My uncle Arnold is from Glasgow, and the insperation for the character of Malcom the Working Class Troll, whose every line is <Translated from incomprehensible Glasgow/Pict dialect>

[The Yosemite Bear]

I would like to paint the devider lines complete with dots through the shitty Yosemite roads, after I fill in all the holes, and string up enough lights along the pedestrian/cyclist paths for it to be safe to drive or ride a bike at night. Park Service being assholes who would rather meet their ticket quotas then make the roads safe, and lack of money prevent me.

(litterially the roads are so shitty that they are desolving on either side and full of holes from erosian, sink holes, and shitty surface work over the years, and they aren't painted nor do they have safety dots, so there's no way of telling where over the line is.)