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COMMUNIQUE from PRIME MINISTER SHROOM THE 777th to His Majesty KING ANDRENEAS II of WILKONIA

Your Highness,

On behalf of the Sovereignty of Shroomania and the Fungal Union of Nations, I would like to ask the good nation of Wilkonia and the rest of the MESS for permission to send refugees to Adrianopolis for a temporary duration, until tensions with Saddamistan have been relieved.

Due to the current state of affairs, it may be unwise to ship refugees and evacuees from Terra Libertia through waters that are of frighteningly close proximity to Saddamistan and we feel that the best hope for our displaced people lies in the nation of Adrianopolis and that from there, they may be sent back to their homes via alternate routes that will not endanger them by placing them anywhere remotely near Saddamistani territory.

The Sovereignty of Shroomania is willing to match Wilkonia's relief fund of $250 million and the Shroomanian Red Cross is also asking for donations locally and internationally through ShroomSatTV.

It is my hope that the Fungal Union of Nations will be able to work together with the MESS and the OMSK to resolve this matter to the mutual satisfaction of all parties.

And if Your Highness ever wishes to resume your tour of the world, the Sovereignty of Shroomania welcomes your presence and would be honored by a visit.

Sincerely,
Shroom the 777th
Prime Minister of Shroomania

Hawthorn Bunker II, Spine Mountain Range
Office of Threat Analysis and Target Tasking(OTATT)
What assets do we have in place? he asked
"We have three US's in range, five RS's in range or able to be moved in with a minimum of an hour's head's up GKS... we have two.

Two? Why only two?

"Not a high location area, we expected US and RS would be needed. Not GKS's sir"

Hmph strategic but not tactical. We'll the US's are configured for tactical strikes?

"Not without good targeting data sir"
Our LANDSAT's are a fall back right?

"With degraded accuracy sir, plus there's the lack of them down there. Again not a high-task area, its a second string area for us Sir."

What about the Royal Radar birds?

"Useless for targeting anything but static locations, they don't exactly have AEGIS radar on them Sir."

Point taken

"Um General Aldrin? Excuse me for asking, but didn't his Grace already make it clear for now we are maintaining a strict non-interference policy?

Lt Jackson? how long have you been in this division?

"One month now, this is my first tasking sir"

Damn that's right, you've not been here long enough to pick up the mind-set here

"Sir?"

Tell you what, sit down there, use your terminal to bring up Case ROB. You should be cleared for that one.

"Yes.. Yes Sir, give a moment......."

And? What is it?

"It's... is this serious? The UKB's Strategic Response plan to the possibility of a Solanum epidemic"? Detail plans for converting a number of civilian building into strongholds against the Horde? Isolation and containment plans? Universal enlistment plans to meet the threat? Offensive plans to deal with the threat to include a updated force matrix? Sir what is this?"

That Lt Jackson is our Zombie survival guide

"Our what?"

His Grace payed a call on us when we were first established to meet the issue of possible crisis around the world. Our very first assignment was Case ROB. He told us, US, then forty eight of the brightest military minds in our country that we were to prepare and map out a response to a threat as unexpected as the living dead. And that if we could do that, then he was confident that there was no threat or situation our group could not plan for.

"How did everyone take it sir?"

Well if not for that bit at the end, about how we would receive his full confidence if we pulled it off it might have been an insult. One or two of us took it that way and resigned, but I can tell you the feeling when we handed in our report and got the word back that not only would this unit go official, we were authorized both special pay and these headquarters was a nice boost. Heck then Lt Commander Durham made Commander by order of his Grace after he read and saw the work she put in on the plans for quick release on how to fortify civilian housing and buildings to resist Zombie attacks for weeks.

"Do we do that kind of thing often sir?"

Often? Heck no, but don't think Case ROB was a one-time thing. His Grace likes to drop these on us about once a year right before the skiing season starts and most of us take advantage of our location to get some serious slope time in. It's become almost a past-time as right after our little vacation is where promotions and awards are handed out. General Titus has been know to push back awards and promotions if he thinks your work on this year's ROB is poor or substandard. None of them are as big as the first Case ROB was but they are all that kind of odd-ball.

"But, sir forgive me for asking but why? Isn't it wasting the military's time to make plans we don't need and maintain them?

Again Lt, look at from this prospective, one most of us are about to go vacation around this time, not the time you want to be stressing how your going to deal how to deal with a joint Tian Xia/Lone-star beach assault, or how to guard against attacks in Atlantis during the meeting. Second, it's kind of like a mental workout. That kind of out the box and around the corner thinking is what's needed here."

"I see"

Plus I think his grace is kind of Paranoid. You know the Gurkha's all carry a clip of Silver tipped bullets in their standard load out?

"No shit? Err.. Sir"

(Laughs)Ease up Lt, we are going to be working togther for the next few weeks on this, but yes, No shit indeed. Heck they will be up here next month you can see for yourself. What I don't buy is the fact this one big noncom also told me they have a Orthodox bishop bless them and dip them in Holy water. That's a little bit paranoid even for his Grace"

"Bless them? What to make them fly better? Or only strike down the impure or something sir?

No, no Lt, he told me they bless the bullets to deal with Vampires
---------------

[OOC] What's the current Date in the STGOD? -- March 10, 2010 apparently [/OOC]

UAC Beard Program Managment Office


"Damn it, we're only like a quarter through this year's deliveries of Beard Anti-Ship Missile Systems, and we're still in the preliminary phase of testing the YMIM-178B and YMIM-179B Airbeards; and the goddamn FUNtopians want them now?

What? They're threatening to cancel their orders for the last several batteries unless they get what they're screaming for now?

Jesus Christ on a Rocket Powered Rubber Crutch....

Ok, Ok Ok. This is what we'll do.

We delivered like nine batteries to the Red Technocracy, the UKB, and Shepnukistan of MIM-173C Spacebeards last year, right?

Okay. So we call up the heads of those nations and ask if we can kindly borrow six of those nine batteries for temporary delivery to the FUN and other Beard program signatories who are worried about Saddamistan.

That should handle the ABM side of things nicely.

Now, for the goddamn FUNtopians and their SAM screaming; well, that's harder to deal with. We only have what, one or two batteries; 128 missiles total actually built for the Airbeard complex, right?

We can pull those off the testing ranges and give them to whichever FUN member feels it's most threatened.

What do you mean? That won't be enough?

Okay, fine. Get me the head of NPO Vympel, yes, that one, in the Red Technocracy. Tell him we'd like an immediate order of their war reserve S-300 systems, and we're willing to pay a premium for immediate delivery.

Does that work? Okay, then carry it out.

*sound of liquor being poured into a tumbler*

Goddamn Saddamistanis, Libertopians, and FUNtopians."

MKSheppard wrote:[OOC] What's the current Date in the STGOD? [/OOC]

OOC:It is March 20th 2010 as of Today OOC

[EDIT]

Baernish MinState
File BMS-9

1) Hasten deployment of a capable SAM system in all FUN countries, positioned so that it can provide cover from the direction of Saddamistan. PeZookia had plans to deploy S-300 systems or SAM version of the Blackbeard sometime in 2011 ; We suggest procurement is moved through now, even if it means deficit spending.

His Grace's Government agrees, and will place orders with Shepnukistan as soon as possible.

2) Create a joint Fun Civil Defence Authority to co-ordinate measures to protect civilians from chemical weapons and sabotage in all FUN countries. This authority would prepare emergency evacuation and quarantine plans in case Saddamistan deploys chemical or biological weapons.

Agreed, but the acronym must not be FEMA, no matter how much Prime Minister Shroom whines.

3) Close down the Central Sea to Saddamistani shipping, by deployment of FastBeard missiles to launch batteries and having naval patrols turn all Saddamistani freighters back to port."

Agreed.

Al Gezira News Network

"We now broadcast His Highness Sultan Ibrahim's video, recorded earlier this day from an anonymous location."



"In the name of Allah, the most compassionate, the most merciful…

"To Saddam the Great in the Arab Socialist Ba'ath Empire of Saddamistan:

"Peace be upon he who follows guidance.

"This talk of mine is to you and concerns the recent misunderstanding between our seas.

"To begin, I tell you: I have no intention of launching a Jihad against your nation. The existance of the "Jihadist Invasion Armada" puzzles me as it infuriates you. For my Jihad is against Shepnukistani and Lonestar, my struggle is of the infidels in Terra Libertia.

While I left the Empire on unfriendly terms, I acknowledge the fact that we are Faithful Believers in common. Our lord blesses us in this world of heresy and infidels.

How it saddens us that you target our villages with your bombing under misinformation of this Armada unrelated to our nation: those modest mud villages which have collapsed onto our women and children.



"You do and I am witness to that.

"However, as your actions are on the basis of a misunderstanding, I am willing to seek for a diplomatic resolution.

"While Northern Terra Libertia may not be as a great nation as Saddamistan, our warriors are strong, and any attempt to land and occupy our nation will result in a heavy price you cannot afford.

"May you deeply reconsider your military actions.

And peace be upon he who follows the guidance."

TXS Vindictive
Off the south coast of Terra Libertia
Several days ago

"Get a CAP up. We're going to have one up at all times from now on."

"Yes, sir."

(OOC: I was out at a party. Haven't been able to pay attention for 18 hours or so).

News in brief from the Qudlivun Free State

Self-Defense Force placed on high alert, militia armed
With the growing international tensions as the result of Arab Socialist Ba'ath Empire of Saddamistan's actions in Terra Libertia the Grand Duke has ordered the arming of the populous. The militia armories began handing out heavy munitions in anticipation of a conflict that would quickly come to our shores if fought. The Grand Duke, anticipating their need, is also querying The Republic of Shepnukistan about hurrying the state's order of Blackbeard missile battalions in addition to any other weapon systems that can be procured in short order.

Qudlivun-born frigate hurrying ordered
The government has ordered all reasonable efforts be made to hurry the Qudlivun designed frigate, yet to named, to be completed as quickly as possible in light of recent tensions.

Convoy en-route to New Patria
A group of four ships has been dispatched to retrieve our order of combat UAVs. The convoy is made up of a FCS tender, a ACV and 2 Kilurki patrol boats. The original government plan was to wait until the entire order was completed prior to arranging shipping but the increased tensions have forced the government to abandon the plan.

Red Technocracy can vow fast protection for Qudlivun

2 Red Technocracy's currently operational S-300 complexes could be forward-deployed to Qudlivun bases in case an agreement to allow for the complexes to be based in Qudlivun.

The Ashford Times

ARMED FORCES PLACED ON HIGH ALERT IN FACE OF SADDAMISTANI AGGRESSION
Emergency military spending bill also approved


An Air Force F-16C Fighting Falcon on the tarmac at Fenette AFB, prior to deploying on an air patrol

FENETTE AFB - With Saddamistan's recent aggression against Terra Libertia, the Duchy of Langley has seen it fit to increase its defenses, despite being relatively far from the action. All active-duty military personnel in all branches have been recalled. The Air Force has started air defense patrols over the island using its F-16s; the Navy has deployed all of its Gepard FACs and its lone Sachsen frigate to guard the coasts, while E-2 Hawkeyes perform AEW duties and CP-140 Auroras equipped with Harpoon and JOCAM missiles carry out maritime patrols. Fastbeards have been pulled out of storage to equip coastal defense launchers; the Army and Marines' newly-acquired Linebackers and Avengers, along with MANPADS squads equipped with Iglas and Starstreaks, have been sortied to guard military bases and civilian areas from aerial attack.

All civil defense measures have been implemented, with all schools, businesses, and government buildings receiving instructions on local civil defense infrastructure and carrying out drills. The National and Coast Guards are under consideration for military mobilization.

In addition, Congress has just ratified an emergency defense spending bill, which was signed into law by Duke Lelouch earlier today. The amount of money being allocated is currently classified at the moment.

Stas Bush wrote:Red Technocracy can vow fast protection for Qudlivun

2 Red Technocracy's currently operational S-300 complexes could be forward-deployed to Qudlivun bases in case an agreement to allow for the complexes to be based in Qudlivun.

The Qudlivun Free State would be interested in more information (including costs for three or six complexes).

SC Communique: The Proposal is a temproray defense measure for the duration of Saddamistan tensions

The two complexes would be installed and operated by the Red Technocracy at designated locations, protecting against a possible aerial assault from Saddamistan.

After the end of the tensions, the S-300 will be removed and returned back to it's permanent dislocation in the RT.

We provide the solution at zero-cost, due to it's mutual beneficiality - you get protection for the days of tension, and we get a forward-warning division of SAM complexes in case Saddamistan actually dares to assault anyone in the Central Sea.

We can't provide more than 2 complexes, however, due to security concerns and shipping issues: 2 will be easily transported in whole by our An-225 in a matter of hours to Qudlivun, but a greater number will take time to transport, as well as undermine our own air defense network.

Stas Bush wrote:SC Communique: The Proposal is a temproray defense measure for the duration of Saddamistan tensions

The two complexes would be installed and operated by the Red Technocracy at designated locations, protecting against a possible aerial assault from Saddamistan.

After the end of the tensions, the S-300 will be removed and returned back to it's permanent dislocation in the RT.

We provide the solution at zero-cost, due to it's mutual beneficiality - you get protection for the days of tension, and we get a forward-warning division of SAM complexes in case Saddamistan actually dares to assault anyone in the Central Sea.

We can't provide more than 2 complexes, however, due to security concerns and shipping issues: 2 will be easily transported in whole by our An-225 in a matter of hours to Qudlivun, but a greater number will take time to transport, as well as undermine our own air defense network.

The Qudlivun Free State will agree to this temporary arrangement and would be willing to open a dialogue concerning purchase of similar units at a later date.

PRAVDA: Two S-300 SAM mobile missile complexes transported to Qudlivun via the Technocracy's An-225




- This is not a full division, of course, - commented the Secretary General, - but it's a good solution for the time being. At least it would mean there are hidden claws in Qudlivun, and prevent possible airspace violations.

- Of course, being constrained, we cannot offer a better and more adequate protection, and for this we ask forgiveness of the smaller nations. We must never forget the goal of Greater Peace and Security, and if we fail to live up to it, it's a problem that requires solution.

Aboard the SRS Independence, enroute to the west coast of Terra Libertia

Admiral Tallon had received emergency orders to proceed to the waters off the west coast of Terra Libertia with all possible haste. He was already flying constant combat air patrols and had ordered NBC protection measures be enacted. His orders were to observe the situation, but to NOT take any action which could be construed as hostile by Saddamistan.

"FLASH message, Admiral!"

"Send it through, Chief."

The admiral looked at his screen, and noted with some relief that the Ranger and her battlegroup had been recalled from their training deployment and were enroute to join them. Thank God they got that new air wing ready for her. I'll feel better with her here.

The Zeus, currently still in port, was being readed to surge. Admiral Tallon suspected they would be held back, to defend the homeland.

He was worried. He had some veterans aboard, pilots from Operation Archangel two years before. But the Shinra Republic Navy had never before engaged in a wide-scale conflict before.

Please don't let that change now he silently prayed to himself.

=========================

President Responds to Crisis

The following measures have been taken by the government to respond to this crisis:

• The President, as Chief Administrator of the MESS, has declared that safe passage will be granted through Adrianpolis to all evacuating foreign nationals.
• Military and civil defenses have been placed on the highest alert. NBC drills are being conducted for all civilians, and the Reserve and National Guard have been fully mobilized. All Air Defense batteries have been activated. Active duty, reserve, and National Guard forces to be deployed in defensive positions.
• Independence and Ranger battlegroups deployed to west coast of Terra Libertia to observe and monitor the situation. Commanders are under strict orders to avoid any indications of hostile action toward Saddamistan. Zeus battlegroup under emergency surge orders, will deploy to support homeland defense.
• The President, as Chief Administrator of the MESS, has requested an emergency mutual defense agreement between the MESS, OMSK, and FUN in case of further Saddamistan aggression. "An attack on one shall be considered an attack on all."

A joint statement from the Chief Administrator, in conjunction with First Administrator Andreneas II has been issued:

"The MESS has publicly delared that Terra Libertia should resolve its own issues without intervention of force by ANY foreign power. We condemn the Saddamistani attacks and demand that offensive actions cease while the claims made by that country may be investigated by an international team of military experts."

Western Saddamistan
H-80 Air Base Command Bunker

Deep inside the bunker, the reconnaissance film from a dozen MiG-25 over flights have been pieced together into a single computerized mosaic projected on the wall. The images showed a complete view of the 200 miles of Terra Libertia coastline centered on Al-Freetown that had been attacked by the 3rd and 4th fighter-bomber divisions.

“Our strikes have been great success,” announced a colonel of the intelligence service, speaking to the assembly of high ranking officers, regiment and squadron commanders in the room. “We have counted two steel freighters, and more then one hundred fifty small boats destroyed, with over one hundred others that are damaged or burned beyond rapid repair.

“So then the armada is defeated?” asked a Major, followed by a chorus of laughter.

“Yes,” said the colonel, suppressing his own chuckles, “the invasion armada is smashed. Unfortunately, while we lost only one aircraft, a MiG flew into the ocean on a strafing run, one primary target escaped serious damage; the runways at Al-Freetown are still usable by C-130 class aircraft.”

“Then we will simply launch additional planes in the second stage operations,” commented a general. “In any case the runway is not terribly important; I am far more concerned with the inland reconnaissance results.”

“As expected,” the colonel continued. “Certain militia base camp areas have become almost deserted, while others have grown considerably. We believe some of the militia has moved to the coastline, while most is massing in these camps to oppose an invasion, exactly as we expected. It is only a matter of awaiting the proper conditions to initiate stage two.”

“The weather forecast is?” asked another general. The meteorological officer quickly came to the front of the room, carrying a thick binder of paper with him.
“Wind forecasts for the next thirty six hours are unfavorable, however after that a low front should push through, shifting winds to the south west with heavy overcast. Perfect conditions.”

“Excellent, I will inform Saddam The Great personally of this news.” said the general. The meteorological officer looked bleak, something as unreliable as weather was not something one wished to be held accountable too. Certainly when dealing with Saddam.

WORLD SOUNDBITE NEW SERVICE
SADDAMISTANI NAVAL BOMBARDMENT TOPPLES TERRA LIBERTIA LIGHTHOUSE !

Sources near the bombed, burning and beleaguered Terra Libertia city of Al-Freetown are reporting a bold new escalation of the crisis with Saddamistani. Still picture images have been obtained by the WSNS that show what appears to be two Saddamistani ‘battleships’ firing guns at an old lighthouse built atop an offshore reef. Water splashes rose over a hundred feet in the air before a direct hit finally broke the stone tower in two, smashing it to rubble. While this cannot be confirmed, other sources indicate that Saddamistani commandeers later landed on the ruins from a naval helicopter, staying only a brief time for reasons unknown.

DDDF: Deutch-Danish-Dusseldorf-Fregency News
JUST IN: OCEAN ‘LITTERED’ WITH BODIES OFF TERRA LIBERTIA!

A Space Liberia registered gravel ship has reported encountering an area of ocean ‘littered’ with floating corpses and debris in the waters between Terra Libertia and Adranpolis. The report spoke of numerous ‘mutilation’ though it is not currently clear if this was the result of sharks or some kind of hostile attack.

Fort Worth Star-Telegram
El Presidente Lonestar confirms that recently deployed Carrier Strike Group is headed for the coast of Terra Libertia

"Only for observation purposes" El Presidente assured the press.

The Strike Force is under the command of RADM Kirk Patrick Barley, and besides the CVN-1 Texas, the CGN Brazos, DDGs Arlington, El Paso, Arlen, Abilene, Irving the LHD Deaf Smith and the Logistics vessel Jefferson David County are included. SECDEF DiBacco confirmed that basing rights are currently under negotiation to stage aircraft out of, although he rushed to assure that no bombers or fighters will be deployed.

Constantinople Times

Emperor orders full mobilization of military. Defence batteries all on high alert.

All coastal defence batteries and S-300 air defence batteries lit up today as the alert level was raised. The Emperor also ordered the mobilisation of some thematic troops (male citizens in general have to serve 2 years military service every year) in anticipation of a possible armed conflict. All naval units were expected to launch on short notice, with air patrols circling and patrolling the airspace and radars were all hot.

In addition, requests for S-400 plans were forwarded to UKB and Shepnukistan in anticipation of a wider conflict.

The crowd began to gather in front of the Hall of Stars. Everyone was carrying the Pastor's photo. Some were praying, hymns were sung.

After sunset, about 30~40 scantly clad young girls began dancing on the stage, singing hymns. The crowd was getting excited, singing with the music, bursts of "Oh~My Bright Star!" spontaneously came out from the crowd as well.

Finally, the music faded, the Pastor came out.

"Tonight, I ask you all to pray." He started, "Not only pray for the innocent people on Terra Libertia, but also for our nation. The end is nigh. I hereby prophecy that Mangka will fall swiftly. The Judgement will come in the form of air. The prophecy will be fulfilled if President Ma and Vice President Amami don't repent.

"We have been asking, begging them, yet they haven't responded.

"Soon a sign will be shown, and if they still don't repent, Judgement WILL be delivered."

"Oh~! Yes~! Oh~My Bright Star!" People began to chant. The crowd was heated up.

"Save the innocent people of Terra Libertia!" "Oh~Yes!"
"Save this nation!" "Oh~Yes!"
"Save the people!" "Oh~Yes!"
"President Ma repent!" "Oh~Yes!"
"Vice President Amami repent!" "Oh~Yes!"
"Oh~Yes!...Oh~Yes!......"

The Pastor cleared his throat.

"And if they don't...Judgement will be delivered. Unless..."

"Unless oh Lord Bright Star You take over!" Someone in the crowd screamed out.
"Yes! You take over!" More joined.
"The Lord is the True Lord!" "Oh~Yes!" The whole hall was screaming.
"We will be saved if he takes over!" "Oh~Yes!" Tears flew, knees bent, consciousness lost....

***

The Hall was in serenity again. All kinds of vehicles were going down the Middle Mountain area, full of people spiritually satisfied.

A white SUV was carrying a different set of people. They had troubled expressions, the one on the passenger seat took up his cell phone and dialed a number.

"Blackbird Unit 231 reporting in. Sir, I think the situation has elevated..."

Rolling Motorcade, Mega-Highway 9 Between Liberty City and New New York. KBVI speaks to his advisor's via secure conference channel. Four faces occupy the corners of the locally made pop-up LCD

Good evening everyone, I'm on my way back from Mountain home. Getting away for awhile was highly useful. But while I've been gone what's happened?

Admiral Ryan spoke first. "Sir not to put to fine a point on it, but the whole situation in Terra Libertia is so close to the breaking point it's beyond words at this point."

The King looked thoughtful. Don't we still have Will in the area Admiral?
The Admiral nodded, "I've given Rear Admiral Adama as much lead as I dare, but for all intents and purposes our Pirate hunting task force is our acting as a ready force in the area."

If there not hunting pirates what are they doing? asked the King
"Drills, constant drills, Damage control, Air-warning, tracking and control... whatever they can run down there with the resources at hand your Grace" said Admiral Ryan.

The King frowned. Anything we can do in the short term?

The Admiral shook his head. "Your Grace, Home Fleet is needed for defense as always, the South Fleet is deployed in a missile shield in the Central Sea to honor our obligation to Zorian defense, And until the strategic situation changes I don't want to pull North Fleet out. It's the hair-trigger in case the Mess tries to take advantage of the Crisis in any way."

Secretary Garcia the head of the office of Media Affairs cleared his throat. He was office issued press releases on behalf on the King. He also personally was a former reporter for the BBC in his youth, in his middle age a member of MI9, Military Intelligence, Section 9. And now his fiftieth year of life he was the King's personal advisory on issues of Intelligence. He spoke now, "I can't give you any details at the moment your Grace, but based on the reports I've read, our on the ground data collection is once again going to limited to the BBC, not that's a bad thing considering how large the BBC has grown. But at the same time, time critical information is going to be non-existant."

Is it an issue of funding, time or ethnicity?

"Ethnicity again your Grace, much as our issue is with getting anyone in the Lonestar republic, we don't have the right people or I should say enough of the right people to know the culture and be the right color to pass as a local.
Most any country on the planet Byzantium, Langley, Shroomia, even Tian Xia. We have the people and the resources. Saddamstain and the Sultanat in Terra Libertia? One of the resources for moving into that area was a long term plan to cultivate ages we could use from there to get into Saddamstain."

Deniable agents I believe you said?

"Yes that's correct your Grace, any Liberaltopia agents we trained would believe they were spying for Syndromia criminal gangs, or the Triads."

The Triads? Are you telling me we finally got a foot in the door?

"Yes sir, the Luen Shen group and the Sun Yee On groups. The police have hit the Sun Yee group hard making it easy to get a an agent or two inside. We should be in a position to discover what if any success that their drive in Liberty City have achieved as well as another possible Intelligence route for us into Mangka."

Remind me to tell Director Granger his hard work is appreciated. Peace gentlemen means stopping threats before they start. said the King

A voice from inside the limo broke in "And that's why I had to explain to Parliament why the black budget needed to be 50 billion dollars this year?"

Prime Minister as always I appreciate the hard work you do for this country on my behalf.

The PM sat across from King and snorted. "You say with such a strait face, do you practice in front of a mirror your Grace?

Every day before I go to bed, just like I practice my bring his head tone of voice and my indifferent waving to the downtrodden. the King intoned.

The PM shrugged, "I've know you since we were boys your Grace, we both know the only thing you appreciate is how fine my head would look on a spike outside the Palace."

His Grace King Blackadder the VI of the UKB smiled. Ah but it's been so long since I've gotten to put anyone's head on a spike.

"You mean never?" The PM shot back.

A good a time as any to start, perhaps with one disobedient who arranged for Line 47 F to be removed from the budget, replied the King.

"Ahh, you would not mean the line in the budget requesting, excuse me if I don't quote it exactly.. Ahem, 1,000 tons of salt sufficient to salt the Earth of my enemies after burning their cities to the ground and driving their women before me. the PM recited

A little test was.. the King began

The PM interrupted. "To test to see if anyone ever read the whole budget? Well no, no one outside of you does. My staff reads it for me, and it was them thank God that brought my attention so I could yank it before it went before the Lords, Which Representative? Who did you sweet talk into getting that modified section added?

Did I mention how excellent your head would look above the front gate? the King asked

"Your Grace? Who? There is only eight members on that panel, it won't be hard to find out which one you talked to or had one of your surrogates talk to." the PM said.

Fine, fine, Representative Talyor, you know the young one, the Former Royal Marine? He represents one of the burbs outside White Sands, I spoke to his Son, fine boy, he's trying out for the Gurkha's already and he spoke to his father and here we are. I hope you shall not wag your figure at the poor man and demand he clean up legislation or some such? the King questioned.

"No your Grace, but as with the other seven I will be watching him to make sure you don't try to slip anything else into next year's budget.

You mean like last year when Lord Tullins voted on the bill that inculded the provision of purchasing a fishing license for a bag limit of one "Adult Male Freshwater Tullins" He got a kick out of it and some fun media exposure on his birthday.

"Your Grace?" the voice came from the driver up front. "We are about to hit city limits, per security concerns all classified materials shall be re-secured and we are about four minutes out from the Palace, there's a car waiting for the PM at the Gate and a press conference has already been called per your request."

Hmm, looks like we will finish this another time. See you all in person ladies and gentlemen, lets end the call here.
----------------------------------

BBC Headline Reports

First pictures from Sultanate in Terra Liberta released.

Gangs of armed men roam the streets, Air strikes continue on all moving transports 95% of North shore boats estimated as being sunk or destroyed in dock. Death toll estimated at 5000.


Dozens of lose bands of the former Sultanate men say they are ready to fight off any possible Saddamstain invasion.

Saddamstain denies any possible invasion in rare press conference earlier today. Says strikes on "Anti-Saddamstain forces will continue until their threat has been elimnated"


Business Section

Blue Sun reports record profits, 40 million current subscribers to it's internet service. Expects to pass 42 million by years end.

White Dwarf Corperation formed to handle selling of high quality Satellite, spin-off of Blue sun parent company.

NEWS FLASH

Rumors from New Patrian Government are that a set of treaties have been signed with the Duchy of Langley leading to closer economic and Military ties. More is expected shortly.

MINERVA



RZAF F-22 Raptor out of the Industria Airfield from the 1st Squadron, prepares for takeoff

On Alert, Military Mobilized

In Light of Recent international events under advisement from senior military advisors, Parliament has authorized Mobilization in responce to increased military activity by the Arab Socialist Ba'ath Empire of Saddamistan, the nation is now at a hightened state of Alert. The Royal Zorian Navy has been launched to repell a potential invasion by the Saddamistani Fleet, Anti-Aircraft and Blackbeard defenses have been readied, the Army, Air Force and Marine Corps have been put on full alert. Recruitment has begun, as well as refressure drills for the Homeguard, who shall work as Emergency Workers and the Last line of Defense should worse come to worse. In total, the military hopes to be able to muster 150,000 Soldiers in the Army Proper with 500,000 Armed and ready Homeguard Soldiers to back them up if worse comes to worse.

"This is a Terrifying time, make no doub't about it" Homeguard Sergent Alexi Soruhama told reporters "We are right on their doorstep and they have a godddamn huge army."

In an Attempt to Midigate our strategic vunerablities against Saddamistan, his Majesty the King has made a flight to the Red Technocracy's Capital of Omsk in an Attempt to bolster Zoria's Defenses. "As part of the OMSK Pact, we who are the most vunerable position, should the unthinkable happen, would require aid from OMSK Pact. We are willing to offer basing rights for soldiers and airfields and offer our ports to resupply and repair to our allies. I must warn you, if war breaks out and the Sovereign Kingdom of Zoria falls, Saddam is not liable to stop there."