Father Says Sons Traumatized By Lesbian Library Book

wolveraptor · Post by **wolveraptor** » 2007-04-21 09:10pm

Darth Wong wrote:If they grew up with this fucktard for a dad, those lesbian sex books are probably the only sex education they're going to get, because you can bet your left testicle that he wouldn't tolerate sex education in his kids' school either.

The man lives in Arkansas. He doesn't have to worry about no fucking sex education.

Duckie · Post by **Duckie** » 2007-04-21 09:30pm

The Duchess of Zeon wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:If they grew up with this fucktard for a dad, those lesbian sex books are probably the only sex education they're going to get, because you can bet your left testicle that he wouldn't tolerate sex education in his kids' school either.
At least they'll know how to keep any future girlfriends satisfied.

Well, they might be a bit confused when it comes time to try Tribadism... ^_^

Why exactly does complaining twice do anything more than once?

Man: This book is icky
Librarian: Ok we'll move it to a section where you have to ask for it.
Man: It's still icky.
Librarian: Holy shit you're right. Let's burn it.

Oni Koneko Damien · Post by **Oni Koneko Damien** » 2007-04-21 09:55pm

Plekhanov wrote:
wolveraptor wrote:Who the fuck looks for jerkoff material in the library? These kids are fucking dumbasses.
Maybe teens who's scarily uptight parents have installed net nanny type filter software on their PCs at home that they haven't figured out how to bypass it.

Um, I think you give them too much credit. This is rural Arkansas, chances are, they don't even have computers.

Gustav32Vasa · Post by **Gustav32Vasa** » 2007-04-21 10:42pm

Poor guys, the library forcing them to read(watch?) a book.

This should be a leasson, always have guards when entering a library to protect you.

If you see a book you dont like, DONT read it. Idiots.

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2007-04-21 10:58pm

Interestingly enough, Bentonville is home to Wal-Mart.
It may be a rural area, but the boonies with outhouses and no electricity it's not.

loomer · Post by **loomer** » 2007-04-21 11:11pm

Traumatized. Sleepless nights. Lesbian sex guide.

Good god, it's the work of the Unholy Satan! And look at their pants and sheets! They're covered in a sticky goo! It must be pus oozing from their tained pores!

Crossroads Inc. · Post by **Crossroads Inc.** » 2007-04-22 01:38am

Isn't it amazing how for fundies the cure for "This Book is Icky to me" Isn't to avoid the book, it is to try and remove it from existance so no one in the rest of America will ever see it.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2007-04-22 02:16am

Glocksman wrote:Interestingly enough, Bentonville is home to Wal-Mart.
It may be a rural area, but the boonies with outhouses and no electricity it's not.

Trailer trash with money is still trailer trash. Britney Spears proved that.

Post by **K. A. Pital** » 2007-04-22 03:13am

Librarian: Holy shit you're right. Let's burn it.

Fahrenheit 451, ahoy!

Stuart Mackey · Post by **Stuart Mackey** » 2007-04-22 03:33am

This fathers name is really Ned Flanders.

VT-16 · Post by **VT-16** » 2007-04-22 07:38am

The boys, aged 14- and 16 came across the book while the 14-year-old was looking for material on military academies.

America, will you accept being defended by these pussies? :P

Ritterin Sophia · Post by **Ritterin Sophia** » 2007-04-22 08:04am

If they were actually 'disturbed' by two women having sex, they're obviously not straight, and I'm all for gays joining the military, my logic is, if I get captured, they're the one's who are going to want to get me back the fastest.

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2007-04-22 08:52pm

Chris OFarrell wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:We really need to find out where this asshat lives so we can send him a subscription to a porno magazine.
And sign him up to every Lesbian sex email list on the internet...

Would never get past his spam filter.

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2007-04-22 08:54pm

wolveraptor wrote:Who the fuck looks for jerkoff material in the library? These kids are fucking dumbasses.

The person who has parents who won't trust them with any spending money, won't let their kids go to the news stand or video store by themselves, won't even let the kids cross the street without an adult holding their hand.

Magus · Post by **Magus** » 2007-04-23 04:30am

aerius wrote:
The Guid wrote:Methinks they didn't use the Dewy system properly - lesbian sex books tend not to be in the military academies section.
Military books are in the 340s and 350s sections. Sex books are filed in the 613.96 area, I would know, I have a couple on loan.

True, the 613s do have the "how to" books. However, the book's title suggests that it's one of those "all-inclusive" books on lesbianism, which might, just might be published with the socio-political stuff in 320, right next door. It's a long shot, I know, but possible.

I worked at a library for a couple years shelving stuff, and I was about to call bullshit on this as well, but then I logged on to a library search and after typing in "Military school" pulled up a book titled "Homosexuality" as the #1 hit. I'll bet the guys did a search, saw an interesting and curious looking title, and decided to take a look at something their parents were probably very cryptic and obtuse about. Their dad caught them, and rather than admit his kids might be interested in lesbians, decided to pretend that they were completely innocent and that the library owed them money.

One last thought: A precedent of compensation for inflicted trauma does not equate a constitutional right to act like a fucking pussy. Grow a pair and find a way to live with those horrendous, disturbing images of lesbians in your head.

Hillary · Post by **Hillary** » 2007-04-23 09:14am

Maybe it's just me, but I'd rather a child of 14 was reading a book about lesbian sex than about military academies. Sex is a far healthier subject matter than the military.

It's so funny that this guy claims his sons are traumatised by lesbian sex but obviously doesn't think they'd be traumatised by combat and war.

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2007-04-23 11:07am

Oh well, looks like we'll have to remove all books about lesbianism from Arkanas. Book learning can't really substitute for hands-on learning anyway.

I guess I'll have to volunteer to go and teach the lesbians how to do it.

Ritterin Sophia · Post by **Ritterin Sophia** » 2007-04-23 01:18pm

wolveraptor wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:If they grew up with this fucktard for a dad, those lesbian sex books are probably the only sex education they're going to get, because you can bet your left testicle that he wouldn't tolerate sex education in his kids' school either.
The man lives in Arkansas. He doesn't have to worry about no fucking sex edumacation.

Fixed it for you!

SVPD · Post by **SVPD** » 2007-04-23 03:02pm

"[They were] greatly disturbed" said Earl Adams his letter to the city. "[We had] many sleepless nights in our house."

I bet the sound of the beds banging against the walls was keeping him up all night!

sketerpot · Post by **sketerpot** » 2007-04-23 04:03pm

Magus wrote:True, the 613s do have the "how to" books. However, the book's title suggests that it's one of those "all-inclusive" books on lesbianism, which might, just might be published with the socio-political stuff in 320, right next door. It's a long shot, I know, but possible.

It's not. I've seen the table of contents on Google, and it's entirely a lesbianism how-to book: relationships, hooking up, and mostly sex in all major permutations from vanilla to fetishistic.

Magus · Post by **Magus** » 2007-04-23 04:15pm

sketerpot wrote:
Magus wrote:True, the 613s do have the "how to" books. However, the book's title suggests that it's one of those "all-inclusive" books on lesbianism, which might, just might be published with the socio-political stuff in 320, right next door. It's a long shot, I know, but possible.
It's not. I've seen the table of contents on Google, and it's entirely a lesbianism how-to book: relationships, hooking up, and mostly sex in all major permutations from vanilla to fetishistic.

I stand corrected. But color me unsurprised that teenage boys might have a thing for naked females.

Seriously - what did the guy expect the phrase "many sleepless nights" to even mean? Are we supposed to believe that his kids were so scared and disturbed by creepy pictures of LesbianLove™ that they had long talks until 4 in the morning to assure them that the scary lesbians weren't coming to get them and make them gay too? Or maybe the kids were super-scared of burning in hell for even looking at such despicable evil. Either way, someone in the family is overreacting, and it's entirely the parents' fault.

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2007-04-23 04:26pm

Hillary wrote:Maybe it's just me, but I'd rather a child of 14 was reading a book about lesbian sex than about military academies. Sex is a far healthier subject matter than the military.

It's so funny that this guy claims his sons are traumatised by lesbian sex but obviously doesn't think they'd be traumatised by combat and war.

Yes, but you aren't a fundy fucknut under the delusion that sex is the most harmful thing in the universe.

Darth Holbytlan · Post by **Darth Holbytlan** » 2007-04-23 04:42pm

I just checked my local library system, and it categorizes the book as a 613. I expect that matches the publisher's recommendation, although I couldn't dig up anything to confirm it.

Oni Koneko Damien · Post by **Oni Koneko Damien** » 2007-04-23 06:01pm

InnerBrat wrote:Oh well, looks like we'll have to remove all books about lesbianism from Arkanas. Book learning can't really substitute for hands-on learning anyway.

I guess I'll have to volunteer to go and teach the lesbians how to do it.

And this, gentlemen, is what we call true dedication. Who else has the courage and fortitude to go out there and teach those nubile young females the finer points of sexual congress? My hat is off to you, InnerBrat, you are an inspiration to us all.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2007-04-23 06:45pm

Stuart Mackey wrote:This fathers name is really Ned Flanders.

Flanders would never take his children to a public library.