Top 20 Uses for Data's Detached Head

EmperorMing · Post by **EmperorMing** » 2003-10-21 02:52am

From the Taldren (SFC) boards
by: SteelClaw

20) Combination paperweight/stapler for Picard's desk
19) The ball in Parisis' Squares
18) Hood ornament for Shuttlecraft
17) Replace Troi's broken Chia Pet
16) Scare blind students in Braille class
15) Prop open doors for maintainence crews
14) Lawn decoration in Arboreteum
13) Footstool for Captain's chair
12) entertaining kids in day care puppet show
11) Scare Alexander into doing chores
10) Send to doctor that killed Crystalline entity as gag gift
9) Decorative air filter in picard's fish tank
8) Send to Starfleet Android research center so they can get "ahead" in research
7) Trade to Ferengi for Star Trek Hologram cards
6) Two words: tether ball
5) Keep Worf's coffee table from shaking
4) Centerpiece in Ten Forward buffet
3) Donate to Starfleet Academy to be head of the class
2) Use as nutcracker at Christmas time
1) Prove to insurance company he died so crew can collect on his life insurance
policy

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-10-21 03:00am

21) Upgraded Palantir of Orthanc
22) Bottle Opener in Ten Forward
23) Ultimate Halloween party piece

The Kernel · Post by **The Kernel** » 2003-10-21 07:44am

24) "Groover"

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-10-21 07:55am

25) High-tech bong.

Post by **Kuja** » 2003-10-21 11:48am

26) Pet Rock

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2003-10-21 02:13pm

27) Something to throw at trolls.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-10-21 02:24pm

28) A really disturbing sex toy.

Isolder74 · Post by **Isolder74** » 2003-10-21 02:45pm

28: Smart Bowling Ball

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2003-10-21 09:11pm

Stormbringer wrote:28) A really disturbing sex toy.

Plug it into a portable power source and with a bit of programming it'll give you a perfect blowjob every time.

Joe Momma · Post by **Joe Momma** » 2003-10-21 11:59pm

Stormbringer wrote:28) A really disturbing sex toy.

Anyone else here remember what Patrick Bateman did with a severed head at one point in American Psycho (at least in the book, I don't know if that scene made it into the movie)? Let's just say he had to concentrate on staying hard enough to keep the head from sliding off while he was walking around...

-- Joe Momma

Death from the Sea · Post by **Death from the Sea** » 2003-10-22 05:47pm

Joe that is fucking sick.

Solid Snake · Post by **Solid Snake** » 2003-10-23 12:08am

Stormbringer wrote:28) A really disturbing sex toy.

I'm surprised it took SDnet that long! That's what first came to my mind when I saw this thread.

Joe Momma · Post by **Joe Momma** » 2003-10-23 03:43am

Solid Snake wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:28) A really disturbing sex toy.
I'm surprised it took SDnet that long! That's what first came to my mind when I saw this thread.

Ditto, but I thought I'd hold off until someone else posted something along the same blue vein.

Death from the Sea wrote:Joe that is fucking sick.

Don't blame me, blame Bret Easton Ellis.

-- Joe Momma