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What is the worst technobabble of all?

Posted: 2003-10-08 03:26am
by The Kernel
I was watching an episode of Voyager last night (don't ask why) and I realized that I hate certain uses of technobabble more than others. So I'm curious, what recurring technobabble words on Star Trek do people hate the most? In other words, which key words are used to form technobable sentances that people find the most offensive?

Here is my top ten list of the most grating:

10) quantum
9) algorithm
8 ) reroute
7) diagnostic
6) radiation
5) singularity
4) holographic
3) generator
2) sub-routine

and finally... 1) compensate

Posted: 2003-10-08 04:16am
by beyond hope
don't forget most anything involving "recalibrate," "phase," or "particle."

Posted: 2003-10-08 04:19am
by Shinova
reverse-polarity. HAS to be.

Posted: 2003-10-08 07:12am
by Superman
No no! How about 'photonic' or worst of all 'photonic life form?'

Posted: 2003-10-08 09:23am
by Old Plympto
Time-based particles never fail to give me gas...

Chronometric particles
Chroniton particles.

Posted: 2003-10-08 09:31am
by Spanky The Dolphin
Shinova wrote:reverse-polarity. HAS to be.
No, "reverse the polarity" is a classic and lovable piece of Doctor Who technobable.

The worst of Trek is "modulate the phase varience." ;)

Posted: 2003-10-08 10:20am
by JME2
The quantum beacons explanation from ENT's 'Shockwave'.

Re: What is the worst technobabble of all?

Posted: 2003-10-08 10:36am
by Col. Crackpot
The Kernel wrote:I was watching an episode of Voyager last night (don't ask why) and I realized that I hate certain uses of technobabble more than others. So I'm curious, what recurring technobabble words on Star Trek do people hate the most? In other words, which key words are used to form technobable sentances that people find the most offensive?

Here is my top ten list of the most grating:

10) quantum.
9) algorithm
8 ) reroute.
7) diagnostic
6) radiation.
5) singularity.
4) holographic.
3) generator.
2) sub-routine.

and finally... 1) compensate
Oh! i can use all of those words in one babbling command!

Reroute the quantum radiation through the holographic generator sub-routine to stabilize the singualrity. Compensate for polarity phasing by utilizing a level one diagnostic algorithm on the teritary computer matrix! If we modulate the phase variance with a netrino beam we should be able to inhibit the formation of chronoton particles on the event horizon!

Posted: 2003-10-08 11:03am
by Death from the Sea
where the hell is SUBSPACE on that list.

you know subspace distortion, subspace rift, subspace field, subspace variance, subspace bubble, subspace "insert any other word here".....

subspace has to be on the list!

Posted: 2003-10-08 11:04am
by Ghost Rider
Even though Crackpot added it in his large statement of the ten Kernel brought up.

Polarity or anything relating to it.

ST abuses this word like Marvel abuses fair.

Posted: 2003-10-08 11:07am
by Spanky The Dolphin
What was the name for DS9's ripoff of Escaflowne's Fate Altercation Machine?

Posted: 2003-10-08 01:08pm
by TrailerParkJawa
For me it is the words "phase" , "reroute", and "polarity".

Why do you always need to reroute power? If all it takes is a few keystrokes wouldnt the computer be capable of doing this without human intervention?
Is anything redundent on a Federation starship except for babble?

Posted: 2003-10-08 01:48pm
by Kamakazie Sith
Whatever is used to win a battle, instead of the ships weapons. That is the worst...period.

Posted: 2003-10-08 01:48pm
by Mad
Fortunately, I've only seen it happen once, but it's still pretty stupid: "anti-matter residue" on the Borg episode of Enterprise.

Posted: 2003-10-08 02:02pm
by JME2
Spanky The Dolphin wrote:What was the name for DS9's ripoff of Escaflowne's Fate Altercation Machine?
simply the gambling device from DS9's 'Rivals'.

Posted: 2003-10-08 02:20pm
by Isolder74
There is intermittent contact in the Input Polerizers.

this phrase was used to indicate a short(iron filling) in some dohicky inside Data's Head.

In short a short in the input thingamajig

Posted: 2003-10-08 02:28pm
by Uraniun235
"covariant subspace flux"

I use that line all the time when I need some over-the-top technobullshit.

Posted: 2003-10-08 03:08pm
by Peregrin Toker
Remember when Data mentioned "subatomic bacteria"???

Posted: 2003-10-08 03:16pm
by Warspite
Anything with the words "quantum", "phase", "subspace" and words ending in -on, usually pertaining to particles or materials.

Posted: 2003-10-08 03:52pm
by Darth Servo
DS9 had a "flux capacitor" once. You know its gotten bad when they're ripping off 'Back to the Future'.

Posted: 2003-10-08 03:56pm
by Kamakazie Sith
Darth Servo wrote:DS9 had a "flux capacitor" once. You know its gotten bad when they're ripping off 'Back to the Future'.
LOL are you sure, that's a bit much. What episode?

Posted: 2003-10-08 06:48pm
by SirNitram
Darth Servo wrote:DS9 had a "flux capacitor" once. You know its gotten bad when they're ripping off 'Back to the Future'.
They went lower. The Infinite Improbability Drive was ripped off for VOY: Threshold.(Yes, that is a sore spot for me)

Posted: 2003-10-08 07:44pm
by Uraniun235
SirNitram wrote:
Darth Servo wrote:DS9 had a "flux capacitor" once. You know its gotten bad when they're ripping off 'Back to the Future'.
They went lower. The Infinite Improbability Drive was ripped off for VOY: Threshold.(Yes, that is a sore spot for me)
IIRC, the Infinite Improbability Drive was first in Star Trek TNG as one of those in-jokes on the control panel... there's a display labeled Infinite Improbability Drive somewhere in Main Engineering on the E-D.

In DS9, there was some sort of probability altering field thingy... which to me sounds more like a ripoff of an Improbability Field from Hitchhiker's. (remember that in the Hitchhiker's universe, there were improbability fields long before the Infinite Improbability Field... used, if I recall correctly, to displace articles of female clothing a few feet away...)

What was VOY: Threshold? Was that that stupid Warp 10 episode?

And I do remember hearing "flux capacitor" in one Star Trek episode, which to me was pretty stupid of the writers... something like the IID they can slip past a bunch of the audience, but the Back to the Future movies are fairly popular.
What was the name for DS9's ripoff of Escaflowne's Fate Altercation Machine?
Sounds like Escaflowne ripped off Douglas Adams to me.

Posted: 2003-10-08 07:49pm
by SirNitram
Uraniun235 wrote:
SirNitram wrote:
Darth Servo wrote:DS9 had a "flux capacitor" once. You know its gotten bad when they're ripping off 'Back to the Future'.
They went lower. The Infinite Improbability Drive was ripped off for VOY: Threshold.(Yes, that is a sore spot for me)
IIRC, the Infinite Improbability Drive was first in Star Trek TNG as one of those in-jokes on the control panel... there's a display labeled Infinite Improbability Drive somewhere in Main Engineering on the E-D.

In DS9, there was some sort of probability altering field thingy... which to me sounds more like a ripoff of an Improbability Field from Hitchhiker's. (remember that in the Hitchhiker's universe, there were improbability fields long before the Infinite Improbability Field... used, if I recall correctly, to displace articles of female clothing a few feet away...)

What was VOY: Threshold? Was that that stupid Warp 10 episode?
I knew about the tribute, but it was clearly that: A tribute.

Threshold held, yep, Warp 10. You went at infinite speed, being in every point of the universe. Oh yea, if you went through, you turned into an animal shaped like a man.

Posted: 2003-10-08 07:56pm
by Spanky The Dolphin
Uraniun235 wrote:
What was the name for DS9's ripoff of Escaflowne's Fate Altercation Machine?
Sounds like Escaflowne ripped off Douglas Adams to me.
I doubt it, just as I doubt they operated in the same manner.