$5M and a helicopter or 5M helicopters and a dollar (RAR!)

[Zor]

In this scenario you are given a choice by ROB between two gifts given to you, they are as such...

The first gift is five million Canadian Dollars deposited into your bank account. Along with the money comes a single Robinson R44 Helicopter that is owned in your name parked at the nearest airfield.



In the other scenario, you get one of these...


As this is about enough for a can of soda, it comes with 5,000,000 R44 helicopters around your home town which are now owned in your name. You have been given a special dispensation signed by your head of state which says for the next six months that exempt these helicopters all over the place from parking violations, littering and similar in their current locations for the next 6 months. Each Helicopter is fully fueled (as is the case in the first variant of this scenario for it's single lone aircraft).

Which do you choose?

Zor

[Borgholio]

5,000,000 helicopters easy. They retail for $425k, but with that number the price would plummet rapidly. Even if the price dropped to a measly $10k a piece, you're looking at 50 BILLION dollars from anybody who could fork over 10k for a helicopter of their own.

So take the 5 million helicopters and sell them.

[Crazedwraith]

Along with the money comes a single Robinson R44 Helicopter parked at the nearest airfield that is owned in your name.

There are no airfields that are owned in my name, do I still get a helicopter?

[Iroscato]

Ah, continuing the tradition of weird RAR's set by our beloved Bear...
Five million helicopters any day of the week. Despite the Sisyphean amount of paperwork that would likely be involved, I would do exactly as Borgholio said. Plus I could write a book about my adventures of the man who suddenly owned 5 million helicopters. Not to mention there would be mass panic and a deep shift in cultural attitudes towards our place in the universe, as millions of helicopters appear out of fucking nowhere. I would use my new found fame and insane wealth to stand astride this brave new world and proclaim myself the messiah of the newly founded and unimaginatively named Helicopterism.

Whenever I get involved with these things, I always see myself ending up with absolute dominion over the earth. Hmm.

[Elheru Aran]

I dunno. A few careful investments and $5m could last a long time, and you get a helicopter to tool around in. No further complications. You can buy a nice house, nice car, invest the rest, and pretty much live the easy life for the rest of your existence. 5 million helicopters would cover... well, a hell of a lot of land and be an enormous hassle. Sure, that's pretty good bank, but really, who needs that many helicopters, and who would buy them, to boot?

[Borgholio]

Well at a sufficiently low price, anybody would. See let's say I just wanted to get rid of them and say that anybody could buy one for a thousand dollars. Keeping one for myself, I sell the other 4,999,999 for a grand each. They'd sell like hotcakes. People won't give a rats ass about the important details such as maintenance, storage, or how to move the damn thing. They just bought a helicopter for a thousand dollars. That'd still net you 5 billion dollars. It'd take a long time to invest 5m and grow it to 5b. And with 5b, you can buy another helicopter if you really want. Or a small island. With several vintage M-60 Patton tanks. And hire crews to man and maintain them.

So yeah, a private island with it's own tank platoon sounds like way more fun than what you can get with just 5m and a helicopter.

[Elheru Aran]

If nobody moves them after they buy them... then you get slapped with the mother of all parking tickets after six months. Better, I think, to avoid the hassle in the first place.

If you're going to go that big-- why not do something better than indulging your every whim? Start up a PAC to reform the government. Put some money into helping eradicate diseases. Boost school systems across the country.

[Borgholio]

If nobody moves them after they buy them... then you get slapped with the mother of all parking tickets after six months. Better, I think, to avoid the hassle in the first place.

Why would I get slapped with the parking ticket? That's what the DMV release of liability form is for. If they don't move it, THEY pay the ticket.

If you're going to go that big-- why not do something better than indulging your every whim? Start up a PAC to reform the government. Put some money into helping eradicate diseases. Boost school systems across the country.

I was simply comparing the fun of having a helicopter to the fun of having your own tank platoon and personal island. But yes I agree fully, with that amount of money, there would be plenty to invest in medicine, education, or governmental reforms while keeping enough for yourself to indulge.

[Iroscato]

Well once I'm HeliPope the 1st (complete with rotor blade equipped fancy hat) I would do all of these things and more. Parking tickets be damned, just hire an army of lawyers and accountants from your near-limitless revenue stream

[The Vortex Empire]

Even if I sold the helicopters for $2 each, I'd still have twice as much money as the alternative. This is a no brainer. I'm sure there are enough organizations and individuals out there who would buy enough of them.

[bilateralrope]

$2 each is probably more than the scrap value of the helicopters.

[Borgholio]

I'm sure there are enough organizations and individuals out there who would buy enough of them.

Even discounting private citizens who buy for the cool factor, there will be businesses and even government organizations who would love to get their hands on cheap helicopters. Firefighting comes to mind, as do news organizations and police departments. Then of course many world militaries would like a chance to get their hands on cheap aircraft or at least spare parts they can be made into.

$2 each is probably more than the scrap value of the helicopters.

The scrap value if everything melted down is probably in the thousands of dollars. A standard size automobile is worth several hundred as scrap. Parted out, even a junk car can be worth a significant fraction of it's intact resale value. A helicopter even more so.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Yeah I will definitely take the five million choppers, although to appease my conscience whilst making obscene amounts of money I'd primarily look at selling to the larger international humanitarian groups, UNICEF, the Red Cross, etc. I'd bet they love cheap helis.

[Darth Tanner]

The fuel in the tanks is worth more let alone the helicopters. The only problem will be getting as many helicopter pilots, scrap men and crane crews as possible to start moving them to secure storage and disassembling them for scrap metal parts before people knick them all.

I don't think you'd have a hells chance of selling them - there are only 27,000 odd civilian helicopters in the entire world with an additional 30,000 military.

It'd probably be much easier to just take the cash as the risk is you'll crash the scrap metal prices or end up with huge bills for storage, security and dismantling.

[Darth Tanner]

Also you just covered 278 square miles in helicopter! My county is only 348 square miles and most of that is built on so I'm going to have a hell of a day with every Brummie knicking my helicopters... or complaining that I've literally covered every field and open space for miles in helicopter!

[Esquire]

Why not sell the helicopters to major helicopter manufacturers in exchange for not crashing the world market? Even at below-scrap prices that'd still be plenty of money to live on forever.

[Napoleon the Clown]

Liquidating five million helicopters would take a lot of time, no matter how much a steal they are. Only so many people would want to buy one and then have all the trouble ownership would entail. Scrap yards would quickly just say no because they're overstocked on parts as it is.


Just take the money and call it good.

[Broomstick]

1 helicopter and $5M

I've done aviation paperwork, and the amount on 5M choppers makes me want to hide under a blanket and whimper at the mere thought of it.

Definitely 1 helicopter and $5M

About $50-100k in rotorcraft lessons

Sell chopper

Invest whatever's left of the original money + any profits from sale. Maybe buy an airplane, much less hassle than a whirlybird.

[General Zod]

I'll take the $5 million. It means I have immediately fungible money available and I can do what I want with it. The amount of time it would take me to offload those choppers offsets the value and I don't want to be responsible for them falling into the hands of some terrorist group.

[biostem]

The empty weight of each helicopter is about 1400 lbs, and each carries 30 gallons of fuel in the main tank, and another 18 in the reserve. Make a deal with a scrap yard to salvage a good chunk of the aircraft - say we split the salvage value if they take care of the necessary labor, salvage equipment, paperwork, etc. I'd need to make another deal with a fuel company to pump out the aviation fuel and get the necessary environmental permits; I think that would still be profitable as well. Finally, I'd hire an accountant/bookeeper to take care of organizing and keeping track of all the paperwork and related materials. Of course, I'd keep 1-3 for myself, and put others up for sale well below market cost, (with the buyer having to take care of any other permits/taxes/etc).

So in short, I'd take the 5M 'copters.

[Executor32]

Does either option include a jogging outfit and comprehensive dental plan?

[muse]

What am I going to do with helicopters?
Can I have 5 million Alpacas instead? Please?

[Irbis]

Even discounting private citizens who buy for the cool factor, there will be businesses and even government organizations who would love to get their hands on cheap helicopters. Firefighting comes to mind, as do news organizations and police departments. Then of course many world militaries would like a chance to get their hands on cheap aircraft or at least spare parts they can be made into.

Look at it, it's shitty minicopter with little useful payload. It's about worthless in every respect requiring more than 300 kg payload. Firefighting? I don't think so. The model is also 40 years old so might fail all kinds of modern requirements and standards.

Then you have the upkeep costs. Helicopters have no papers, getting them to fly requires both paperwork and pilots. That's expensive. Then, you need vast army of guards making sure scrap thieves aren't stealing some expensive parts each night. Costs, costs, costs. What about storage after 6 months? More money. Sales rights and liability fund? Money. Lawsuit from Robinson on stealing their design and illicit production?

Frankly, you'd be probably better off donating 1000 or so along with entire fuel load to your government in return for help with piling the rest on some land plot as scrap where you can mine them for scrap metal and cheap parts forever.