House Party Bollock Thief!

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2007-06-15 11:34am

Woman jailed for testicle attack

A woman who ripped off her ex-boyfriend's testicle with her bare hands has been sent to prison.

Amanda Monti, 24, flew into a rage when Geoffrey Jones, 37, rejected her advances at the end of a house party, Liverpool Crown Court heard.

She pulled off his left testicle and tried to swallow it, before spitting it out. A friend handed it back to Mr Jones saying: "That's yours."

Monti admitted wounding and was jailed for two-and-a-half years.

'Pulled hard'

Sentencing Monti, Judge Charles James said it was "a very serious injury" and that Monti was not acting in self defence.

The court heard that Mr Jones had ended his long-term but "open relationship" with Monti towards the end of May last year.

The pair remained on good terms and on 30 May she picked him up from a party in Crosby and went back for drinks with friends at Mr Jones's house.

An argument ensued and Mr Jones said there was a struggle between them.

In his statement, Mr Jones said she grabbed his genitals and "pulled hard".

He added: "That caused my underpants to come off and I found I was completely naked and in excruciating pain."

The court heard that a friend saw Monti put Mr Jones's testicle into her mouth and try to swallow it.

She choked and spat it back into her hand before the friend grabbed it and gave it back to Mr Jones. Doctors were unable to re-attach the organ.

In a letter to the court, Monti said she was sorry for what she had done.

She said: "It was never my intention to cause harm to Geoff and the fact that I have caused him injury will live with me forever. I am in no way a violent person."

The letter added: "I have challenged myself to explain what has happened but still I just cannot remember. This has caused much anguish to me and will do for the rest of my life."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/4253849.stm

I don't think her anguish is going to be much in comparison to his, somehow.

Dark Flame · Post by **Dark Flame** » 2007-06-15 11:43am

Owwwwwww!! That just makes in cringe in pain.

Raw Shark · Post by **Raw Shark** » 2007-06-15 11:46am

Amanda Monti wrote:I am in no way a violent person.

Thanks for clearing that up, Amanda.

Mobiboros · Post by **Mobiboros** » 2007-06-15 11:51am

A friend handed it back to him and said "That's yours"!?

Okay. Enraged woman ripping of testicle I can see happening even if I think she's nuts.
Her trying to swallow it, I can almost get due to the aforementioned "She's nuts" thing.

But why did one of their friends pick it up and hand it back to him!?

Who looks down and says "Oh my. A testicle. Perhaps I should return this to it's owner whom I just watched the castration of."?

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2007-06-15 11:54am

Mobiboros wrote:A friend handed it back to him and said "That's yours"!?

Okay. Enraged woman ripping of testicle I can see happening even if I think she's nuts.
Her trying to swallow it, I can almost get due to the aforementioned "She's nuts" thing.

But why did one of their friends pick it up and hand it back to him!?

Who looks down and says "Oh my. A testicle. Perhaps I should return this to it's owner whom I just watched the castration of."?

I would've done the same. This crazy womean wants to destroy the man's bollock, I'd give it to him so he doesn't lose it. I would probably say the exact same thing, too, haha!

Raw Shark · Post by **Raw Shark** » 2007-06-15 11:56am

Perhaps he was in a state of shock from what he'd just seen and was just trying to sort it all out in an unambiguous manner for the sake of his own sanity.

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2007-06-15 12:25pm

Christ. Didn't a similar thing happen a while ago? Mad woman lops off guy's genitals and tries to eat it?

Mobiboros · Post by **Mobiboros** » 2007-06-15 12:54pm

Rye wrote: I would've done the same. This crazy womean wants to destroy the man's bollock, I'd give it to him so he doesn't lose it. I would probably say the exact same thing, too, haha!

See, I'd probably pack it in ice. The guy is probably rolling around clutching a bloody groin. Tossing it to him and saying "That's yours" just kinda strikes me as being kinda mean

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2007-06-15 01:33pm

Shroom Man 777 wrote:Christ. Didn't a similar thing happen a while ago? Mad woman lops off guy's genitals and tries to eat it?

As a matter of fact, yes, and it was actually worse than that. She chewed his genitals clean off.

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2007-06-15 01:45pm

Oh god why?!

I also have a mental image of the bitch sticking out her tongue and going "nanana!" with the testicle/penis in her mouth.

Vampiress_Miyu · Post by **Vampiress_Miyu** » 2007-06-15 02:19pm

Oh.....Jebus.....-gags- That's awful.....x.X

loomer · Post by **loomer** » 2007-06-15 02:32pm

Oh, god. Sympathy pain.

General Trelane (Retired) · Post by **General Trelane (Retired)** » 2007-06-15 02:42pm

Crazy Immortal Samurai should see this considering his request for advice in ARSE.

White Haven · Post by **White Haven** » 2007-06-15 04:04pm

Critical hit!

You know, the little side of me that just will not stop being a smartass juts asked how this would interact with the old 'Eye for an eye' ethos.

The Vortex Empire · Post by **The Vortex Empire** » 2007-06-15 04:43pm

Holy crap. She bit his testicle off? What kind of psycho does that? Well, at least she didn't rip off both of them.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2007-06-15 05:29pm

The Vortex Empire wrote: Holy crap. She bit his testicle off? What kind of psycho does that? Well, at least she didn't rip off both of them.

No, she ripped it off. That must've been some grip!

Tanasinn · Post by **Tanasinn** » 2007-06-15 06:19pm

We men really need to evolve a better containment system for the 'ol pair.

The Vortex Empire · Post by **The Vortex Empire** » 2007-06-15 08:18pm

Tanasinn wrote:We men really need to evolve a better containment system for the 'ol pair.

Agreed. An inch thick layer of bone should suffice. Too bad they need to be within the correct temperature zone, or they wouldn't need to be in a sac of skin.

Elaro · Post by **Elaro** » 2007-06-15 09:05pm

Tanasinn wrote:We men really need to evolve a better containment system for the 'ol pair.

I present to you... the codpiece. Also known as the jackstrap, the cocklock* and the Holy Guardian of the Sacred Dingle Wingle Wings*.

Also, owwwww.

*I made that up.