World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

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Lord Relvenous
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World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by Lord Relvenous »

http://www.freedomrequireswings.com/201 ... eader.html
Yesterday afternoon, one of the biggest milestones in LGBT history and the worldwide fight against homophobia was marked.

The board of directors of Exodus International, the world's largest ministry claiming to be able to "cure homosexuality" and turn gay men towards a "heterosexual lifestyle", announced the ministry is shutting down.

Writing on the official website, Alan Chambers, the president of Exodus International, publicly apologized to the gay community saying he is "deeply sorry [...] for the pain and hurt" caused to so many by his ministry's practices.

"Proclaiming freedom from homosexuality" since it's creation in 1976, Exodus was an umbrella organization which grew to include over 120 local ministries in the United States and Canada, and over 150 ministries in 17 other countries including the UK, France and Australia.

In April, John Paulk, former chairman of Exodus, renounced his past involvement in the movement and expressed remorse for his actions.

Here is Chambers's letter to the LGBT community.
To Members of the LGBTQ Community:

In 1993 I caused a four-car pileup. In a hurry to get to a friend’s house, I was driving when a bee started buzzing around the inside of my windshield. I hit the bee and it fell on the dashboard. A minute later it started buzzing again with a fury. Trying to swat it again I completely missed the fact that a city bus had stopped three cars in front of me. I also missed that those three cars were stopping, as well. Going 40 miles an hour I slammed into the car in front of me causing a chain reaction. I was injured and so were several others. I never intended for the accident to happen. I would never have knowingly hurt anyone. But I did. And it was my fault. In my rush to get to my destination, fear of being stung by a silly bee, and selfish distraction, I injured others.

I have no idea if any of the people injured in that accident have suffered long term effects. While I did not mean to hurt them, I did. The fact that my heart wasn’t malicious did not lessen their pain or their suffering. I am very sorry that I chose to be distracted that fall afternoon, and that I caused so much damage to people and property. If I could take it all back I absolutely would. But I cannot. I pray that everyone involved in the crash has been restored to health.

Recently, I have begun thinking again about how to apologize to the people that have been hurt by Exodus International through an experience or by a message. I have heard many firsthand stories from people called ex-gay survivors. Stories of people who went to Exodus affiliated ministries or ministers for help only to experience more trauma. I have heard stories of shame, sexual misconduct, and false hope. In every case that has been brought to my attention, there has been swift action resulting in the removal of these leaders and/or their organizations. But rarely was there an apology or a public acknowledgement by me.

And then there is the trauma that I have caused. There were several years that I conveniently omitted my ongoing same-sex attractions. I was afraid to share them as readily and easily as I do today. They brought me tremendous shame and I hid them in the hopes they would go away. Looking back, it seems so odd that I thought I could do something to make them stop. Today, however, I accept these feelings as parts of my life that will likely always be there. The days of feeling shame over being human in that way are long over, and I feel free simply accepting myself as my wife and family does. As my friends do. As God does.

Never in a million years would I intentionally hurt another person. Yet, here I sit having hurt so many by failing to acknowledge the pain some affiliated with Exodus International caused, and by failing to share the whole truth about my own story. My good intentions matter very little and fail to diminish the pain and hurt others have experienced on my watch. The good that we have done at Exodus is overshadowed by all of this.

Friends and critics alike have said it’s not enough to simply change our message or website. I agree. I cannot simply move on and pretend that I have always been the friend that I long to be today. I understand why I am distrusted and why Exodus is hated.

Please know that I am deeply sorry. I am sorry for the pain and hurt many of you have experienced. I am sorry that some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt you felt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents. I am sorry that there were times I didn’t stand up to people publicly “on my side” who called you names like sodomite—or worse. I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know. I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him that I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart. I am sorry that I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine.

More than anything, I am sorry that so many have interpreted this religious rejection by Christians as God’s rejection. I am profoundly sorry that many have walked away from their faith and that some have chosen to end their lives. For the rest of my life I will proclaim nothing but the whole truth of the Gospel, one of grace, mercy and open invitation to all to enter into an inseverable relationship with almighty God.

I cannot apologize for my deeply held biblical beliefs about the boundaries I see in scripture surrounding sex, but I will exercise my beliefs with great care and respect for those who do not share them. I cannot apologize for my beliefs about marriage. But I do not have any desire to fight you on your beliefs or the rights that you seek. My beliefs about these things will never again interfere with God’s command to love my neighbor as I love myself.

You have never been my enemy. I am very sorry that I have been yours. I hope the changes in my own life, as well as the ones we announce tonight regarding Exodus International, will bring resolution, and show that I am serious in both my regret and my offer of friendship. I pledge that future endeavors will be focused on peace and common good.

Moving forward, we will serve in our pluralistic culture by hosting thoughtful and safe conversations about gender and sexuality, while partnering with others to reduce fear, inspire hope, and cultivate human flourishing.

Alan Chambers
"We’re not negating the ways God used Exodus to positively affect thousands of people, but a new generation of Christians is looking for change – and they want to be heard," Tony Moore, Board member of Exodus. The message came less than a day after Exodus released a statement apologizing to the gay community for years of undue judgment by the organization and the Christian Church as a whole.

For these reasons, the Board of Directors unanimously voted to close Exodus International and begin a separate ministry. "This is a new season of ministry, to a new generation," said Chambers. "Our goals are to reduce fear, and come alongside churches to become safe, welcoming, and mutually transforming communities."
And yet again, we see that the most fervent homophobes are those who are burying their own homosexuality.

While none of this changes the hell the poor kids put through these types of "treatment" have gone through, at the very least it means less will in the future.
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Re: World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by LadyTevar »

While I am happy to see Exodus closing, the "separate ministry" is probably going to be just as bad. They are also not closing the breakaway chapters, merely taking away the Exodus name from them. There are still going to be groups out there trying to "pray away the gay", and they will still try to resort to brainwashing.

But this is a good first step.
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Re: World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by Lord Revan »

Still even a single can be a major one, sure not all of "pray away the gay" churches closed down, but what this can do is change the public preseption about these churches. After all then only work cause parents bring their children or adults join "willingly", but if the public is made aware of what these places truly are then there's less people to join. I'll admit I'm not american but I assume that most homophobic americans are that simply cause they were raised to be afraid of "the gay" and don't know better.

I remember that I was quite homophobic when I first joined if not openly so, I ain't that anymore since it's kind of hard to hold to negative images of a group of people when everyone you meet seems to be an exception to the rule it makes you wonder if it's rule that's exception after all.
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Re: World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by UnderAGreySky »

Please know that I am deeply sorry. I am sorry for the pain and hurt many of you have experienced. I am sorry that some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt you felt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents. I am sorry that there were times I didn’t stand up to people publicly “on my side” who called you names like sodomite—or worse. I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know. I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him that I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart. I am sorry that I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine.
Now THIS is a real apology. None of that stupid "I'm sorry if you were offended by what I did/said" that politicians and generally any celebs seem to trot out.

As he said this doesn't right all the wrongs he's done but it will make it easier for people to forgive him depending on his future actions.
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Re: World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by cadbrowser »

UnderAGreySky wrote:
Please know that I am deeply sorry. I am sorry for the pain and hurt many of you have experienced. I am sorry that some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt you felt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents. I am sorry that there were times I didn’t stand up to people publicly “on my side” who called you names like sodomite—or worse. I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know. I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him that I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart. I am sorry that I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine.
Now THIS is a real apology. None of that stupid "I'm sorry if you were offended by what I did/said" that politicians and generally any celebs seem to trot out.

As he said this doesn't right all the wrongs he's done but it will make it easier for people to forgive him depending on his future actions.
Call me wierd or whatever; but I was deeply touched by this apology. I agree with you, it does seem very sincere.

I can only hope that more Christians become enlightened like this man has. It isn't the "best" outcome; by damn, it is a good start. I can only wish them the best of luck in their endeavors for...
I pledge that future endeavors will be focused on peace and common good.
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Re: World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by Broomstick »

I think what makes this apology unusual is that he acknowledges that even though every thing he did was without malice and with the intention to help others he still caused damage and pain. He knows that saying "I'm sorry" and "I didn't mean to hurt anyone" isn't enough and doesn't make the pain go away. He acknowledges the unintended consequences of his actions.

If only more people would do that.
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Re: World's largest "gay-curing" ministry closes, apologizes

Post by CaptJodan »

The apology seems very genuine and heartfelt. It seems consistent with a Christian actually trying to follow the proper teachings of the book he ascribes to believe in. He doesn't make apologies for the beliefs he holds; it's obvious that he still has a problem with gay marriage, of homosexual sex, etc, but he still realizes he did more harm than good.

Few apologies seem genuine, but this one has the mark of it. Whether or not that new organization will be different or better, I don't know, but it does seem a good start. Discrediting these organizations go a long way to continuing to push the narrative away from "disease" which can only be a good thing.
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