Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pills

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TheHammer
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by TheHammer »

Dread Not wrote:
TheHammer wrote:
Alyrium Denryle wrote: Only because you are an idiot. On the other hand, this comes as a shock to exactly zero people in this thread with the possible exception of Jub. The woman has a wider option set when it comes to taking responsibility for a pregnancy.
No shit she has a wider option set dumbass. Woman can choose to take responsibility, men have it thrust upon them regardless of what they would choose. Which is precisely the point.
No, you totally missed the point, shit-for-brains, which is that abortion is also a form of taking responsibility. And ya know what that means? It means that men don't have responsibility "thrust upon them" any more than women do.
Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child. Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter. So yes they do have it thrust upon them.
You seem to think that you have a "check and mate" silver bullet caliber of argument on your hands with your appeal to hypocrisy, when it simply sound like:
Actually my comments on the hypocrisy shown in this thread are irrelevent to the argument. They are more about the tone of this discussion and how the people making those statements are coming across. At the very least, they should see that it is bad form to use the same justifications for denying men additional options that were at one time used to deny women the right to choose.
Hammer: Hey, how come I have to walk all the way across the parking lot and that guy can park right next to the door?

Guy: He has cerebral palsy. He gets to park in the handicapped spot.

Hammer: But I want to park next to the door!

Guy: Then you should come earlier when it’s less busy.

Hammer: Are you going to tell him to come when it’s less busy?

Guy: No, because he has access to handi-

Hammer: HYPOCRITE! HYPOCRITE ALERT!

Yes, because if “Do/don’t do X if you don’t want Y” is an invalid solution under one set of circumstances, it’s clearly invalid under all circumstances. That’s not fallacious at all. :roll:
Where to begin... In short, no, its not at all like what you just said.

A better analogy would be to liken it to the NAACP taking segregationalist slogans from the 60's, and replacing the word "negro" with "hispanic".
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Dread Not »

TheHammer wrote:Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child.
Yes, in your mewling about "fair balance" you parroted a pro-lifer slogan about responsibility, but it assumes that there are no other responsible options for the woman, and Aly pointed out that there are. It illustrates that you are putting the cart before the horses by assuming unequal treatment = unfair treatment, and are using that premise to draw a false equivalency in the validity of preventative measures for each sex.
TheHammer wrote:Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter. So yes they do have it thrust upon them.
Unless the woman is a succubus out for your semen, men DO have a choice in the matter, fucknuts. Just not for as long. Pregnancy does not put men and women in the same position and it is therefore asinine to insist that a solution for men can't apply if it doesn't apply to women.
TheHammer wrote:Actually my comments on the hypocrisy shown in this thread are irrelevent to the argument. They are more about the tone of this discussion and how the people making those statements are coming across. At the very least, they should see that it is bad form to use the same justifications for denying men additional options that were at one time used to deny women the right to choose.
Yeah, you've lost on substance and have decided to cry about style.
TheHammer wrote:Where to begin... In short, no, its not at all like what you just said.
Where to begin? Putting some effort into addressing the point usually helps as opposed to simply responding with "nuh uh."
TheHammer wrote:A better analogy would be to liken it to the NAACP taking segregationalist slogans from the 60's, and replacing the word "negro" with "hispanic".
No, what you have essentially done is take an argument like "having kids with a person who is HIV positive is a bad idea" and said "*GASP!* That's the same arguments used against miscegenation! Just substitute 'HIV positive' with 'negro'! What are you a Nazi?!"

You completely ignore that the circumstances totally change matters and harp on the superficial similarities like Broomstick said.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

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TheHammer wrote:Otherwise, as I said, the absolute best thing for YOU to have done would have been to simply acknowledge that yes it's an unfair situation, and then politely kept your mouth shut.
Until a man is actually pregnant no, it's not a similar situation at all. Sorry if reality keeps bitch-slapping you but that's why women decide whether or not to abort or birth - because THEY are the ones who get pregnant. Men are not. Men only have control over their own bodies, which means their options involve where to stick their dick and whether or not to make a sperm deposit.

So, again, stop distorting my position you dishonest piece of shit and stop accusing me of being pro-life. Or just admit your the sort of slime that places your convenience above that of any other human beings, including both a child you have fathered and the women you used to incubate that child. Didn't want the child? Then you should have done something to prevent said child. Engaged in birth control that didn't work? So sorry - shit happens. Earthquakes, meteor strikes, unwanted babies... all have to be dealt with.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Broomstick »

TheHammer wrote:Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child. Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter.
Yes, men do have a choice. They can choose where to leave their sperm. Is that less fun than irresponsible sex? Sometimes. Guess what, fuckwit, being a grow up means sometimes you have to delay gratification or restrain yourself from doing dumb shit. So grow the fuck up already.
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Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.

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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Andrew_Fireborn »

Ah, this topic never ceases to be hilarious.

Not just this thread. Recall back to that copy-pasta story about the man who had a vasectomy throwing it in the face of a woman who slept around on him as she attempted to saddle him with child support. Was he a douche bag, real or ficitonal? Oh yes. Does that excuse her actions? Only to people who hold women blameless of any action they undertake, and there was plenty of that in that thread.

Which I bring up because a vasectomy seems about the only option that doesn't involve complete abstention from sex. Which has well established physical and mental health benefits, as well as being one of the strongest instinctual drives.

Women can, will, and do lie about being on the pill. Then there's the inherent fault rate of all birth control. I constantly hear 2% for condoms, though this chart on wiki puts it's real world at 15% and "the pill" at 8%, versus an 'ideal' of 0.3%. Which, may or may not take into account "sabotage" like aforementioned lies, or poking holes in the condoms. The footnotes cite James Trussell for the numbers, via Contraceptive Technology (19th ed.).

Ultimately, one must take responsibility for their own actions, and you'll seldom be surprised if you assume others are shirking their responsibility in any cooperative action.

I do love though, the comments in this thread that show that idea of the default male social role, that of hard working bread winner who must sacrifice everything for his family up to and including his health or even his life, is still going quite strong. Even as the counterpart female roles are demonized as archaic, patronizing, or oppressive.

It really is all a grand joke.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Terralthra »

Broomstick wrote:
TheHammer wrote:Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child. Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter.
Yes, men do have a choice. They can choose where to leave their sperm. Is that less fun than irresponsible sex? Sometimes. Guess what, fuckwit, being a grow up means sometimes you have to delay gratification or restrain yourself from doing dumb shit. So grow the fuck up already.
Actually, your position is that men, if they don't want to be fathers, should refrain from sex almost entirely, as basically every precaution a man could take is not foolproof, and your position is that if a precaution fails, it's still on the man to pay for the results.

Only have sex with clearly post-menopausal women, I suppose, is a possibility consistent with your position. Have to be careful, since menopause is not a 100% on/off thing, and women going through menopause may still ovulate occasionally. So, that's a possibility to have sex consistent with your position. Other than that, your position is "If you don't want to pay for child support, be abstinent."

Depending on your position on the legal cases I've mentioned, your position broadens to "If you don't want to pay for child support, be abstinent, don't ever get drunk, don't get raped, and don't masturbate such that someone can get to your semen afterward."
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Jub »

Terralthra wrote:
Broomstick wrote:
TheHammer wrote:Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child. Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter.
Yes, men do have a choice. They can choose where to leave their sperm. Is that less fun than irresponsible sex? Sometimes. Guess what, fuckwit, being a grow up means sometimes you have to delay gratification or restrain yourself from doing dumb shit. So grow the fuck up already.
Actually, your position is that men, if they don't want to be fathers, should refrain from sex almost entirely, as basically every precaution a man could take is not foolproof, and your position is that if a precaution fails, it's still on the man to pay for the results.

Only have sex with clearly post-menopausal women, I suppose, is a possibility consistent with your position. Have to be careful, since menopause is not a 100% on/off thing, and women going through menopause may still ovulate occasionally. So, that's a possibility to have sex consistent with your position. Other than that, your position is "If you don't want to pay for child support, be abstinent."

Depending on your position on the legal cases I've mentioned, your position broadens to "If you don't want to pay for child support, be abstinent, don't ever get drunk, don't get raped, and don't masturbate such that someone can get to your semen afterward."
Clearly the solution is to expect women to take it in the rear, that's about as safe as you can get with a fertile woman.

Broomstick also seems to forget that men tend to desire sex more often than a woman of the same sexual maturity. This is a biological fact and men suffer more from forgoing sex than a woman does. Though I guess only men should ever have to suck up physical and psychological effects related to sex...
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Terralthra »

Jub wrote:Broomstick also seems to forget that men tend to desire sex more often than a woman of the same sexual maturity. This is a biological fact and men suffer more from forgoing sex than a woman does. Though I guess only men should ever have to suck up physical and psychological effects related to sex...
That's...not borne out by research, once sociological factors are taken into account. Remember that as late as a century ago, women were carefully watched and controlled, because they were simply incapable of controlling their libidos.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

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Terralthra wrote:
Jub wrote:Broomstick also seems to forget that men tend to desire sex more often than a woman of the same sexual maturity. This is a biological fact and men suffer more from forgoing sex than a woman does. Though I guess only men should ever have to suck up physical and psychological effects related to sex...
That's...not borne out by research, once sociological factors are taken into account. Remember that as late as a century ago, women were carefully watched and controlled, because they were simply incapable of controlling their libidos.
Males of most species are designed to have sex with multiple things and as often as they can. It would stand to reason that this could create a higher sex drive. As near as I can tell research is still out on this, but we also don't study sex very intensively either.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Lusankya »

TheHammer wrote: Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child. Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter. So yes they do have it thrust upon them.
Actually, technically speaking, the choice a woman makes is the one regarding her bodily integrity. Once the baby is born, both parents have an equal responsibility for raising and supporting the child. It just so happens that the only way to protect a woman's bodily integrity is to remove the foetus. If babies just popped into existence immediately after unprotected sex, or baies grew on trees, then the law would probably read differently.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Alyrium Denryle »

My apologies. I have been bogged down.
Ignoramus wrote:Nice lack of context. Namely the fact that it was minor in comparison of the 9 months of pregnancy vs the 18 years thereafter. I stand by my assertion that most women who choose to have an abortion do so because of reasons other than because they have concerns about the 9 months of pregnancy.

If the chance of death (In the US, that's about 650 per year out of 4 million live births or 0.016%), or other health complications are truly the primary driver, then I expect you'd support a law limiting abortions only to cases where the mother's health is a risk correct?
The chance of death is not the primary concern. The woman's overall health is, the side-effects of pregnancy itself in terms of her career are. A woman who is pregnant or could become pregnant is often denied employment or let go--there are laws to prevent this, but they are trivially easy to circumvent. Then there is physical morbidity--nor mortality, but morbidity. Complications from pregnancy are not just a binary "death/just fine" switch.

Then we get into issues regarding who the default primary care giver not just in our society, but most societies happens to be. When push comes to shove, deadbeat fathers who abrogate the actual raising of their children are far more common than deadbeat moms. Single mothers are over and above more common than single fathers. Moreover, single fathers are held in higher regard than single mothers due a sexual double standard and the sexist notion that men who are single fathers are taking on a particularly difficult burden due to their strong character...while single mothers are often held in some degree or another of contempt for being sluts.

Given all that, does it not make sense that that--biological reality aside--the mother should have wider latitude in her choices? That she--who has more to lose by becoming pregnant--should have more say in what happens with regard to a pregnancy and resultant offspring?

As much as we might wish that both parents are equal stakeholders, the fact remains that they are not, and in fact there are very few species where they are equal stakeholders.
The woman can opt out of raising a child by choosing to have an abortion. If she chose not to do so, obviously, she most likely wanted to keep the child. That makes the statistics in this case wholly irrelevent. If you are unable to comprehend this, let me know and I'll try to go slower.
Are you really that stupid? Really?

An abortion is not a trivial up-front cost. Nor is access to abortion universal thanks to the efforts of pro-life groups. For that matter, many women hold themselves to ethical and religious beliefs that are incompatible with abortion.
So what's your point? That Women get a raw deal in other aspects of society? I'm not defending the inequality of that situation. No statements from me saying "Tough shit! She should get her tubes tied if she wants to be paid like a man" or "Well it sucks she's not paid like a man, but life isn't fair!". If society's ultimate goal is gender equality, then the "Tough shit! Life isn't fair" statements shouldn't be tossed around like they have been in this thread.
The point is, until that situation changes, the woman having a disportionate say in whether the offspring is born is perfectly justified, even if we completely discount the bodily integrity issue.

Just because we want the world to be other than it is, does not mean we should not cope and deal with the world as it is.
No shit she has a wider option set dumbass. Woman can choose to take responsibility, men have it thrust upon them regardless of what they would choose. Which is precisely the point.
First of all, you have just proven that you have either not read, or not comprehended, what I have said in this thread. My saying this does not imply that I am shocked precisely. That would be absurd given what is presently known about your intellectual faculties--limited as we all know they are. That said, I suppose I should explain.

Both parties assume a risk of pregnancy when they mate. Both MUST take responsibility for the consequences of the choices they make with regard to their mating. Having an abortion is a way in which a woman--and only a woman by nature of biology and her carrying the resulting fetus, having an interest in her bodily integrity and even discounting that issue, empirically if not ideally sharing the majority of the burden of parenthood--may take responsibility for the consequences of her actions. It is not a get out of jail free card. She is not abrogating her responsibility. That is your problem. You think that abortion is a way out of responsibility, and thus it is unfair that women have a way to not take said responsibility while men do not. It is no such thing. It is a different means for taking responsibility.

If a child is born, that child has an absolute right to be provided and cared for. The child may be raised--either by both parents or one with the other providing financial assistance. The child may be adopted out by mutual agreement. Or, in special cases, one parent may abnegate their parental responsibilities if the other parent marries and another individual is willing to step in and take their place by formally adopting the child.

Those are the options. Once the child exists, no notion of fairness applies because the right of that child to be provided and cared for is absolute. It overrides any concern either parent has, and the initial conditions under which the child was born are, frankly, irrelevant. A parent who is unable to provide adequately for the child may have to take the long road with regard to the fulfillment of said responsibilities (for example, they may have to get an education and gainful employment before they can pay child support in arrears). However, that does not eliminate those responsibilities.
Context matters. Clearly I was referring to responsibility for raising/supporting a child. Women can choose to take that responsibility. Men have no choice in the matter. So yes they do have it thrust upon them.
Not in this case, because Dread Not is right. You are missing the point. Probably intentionally because you are in fact an intellectually dishonest pustule. A swollen oozing abscess on humanity.

You dont get to define your way out of the counter-argument by shifting the goal posts down the causal chain.
Terralthra wrote:Depending on your position on the legal cases I've mentioned, your position broadens to "If you don't want to pay for child support, be abstinent, don't ever get drunk, don't get raped, and don't masturbate such that someone can get to your semen afterward."
With regard to the use of birth control, condoms etc, there is still the matter of assumption of risk. Think of it in terms of tort law (sort of). Once reasonable precautions are taken you might still be liable for damages in say... a car accident. Accidents happen, that does not mean that due to the assumed risk, one should not be held liable for the outcome thereof. The drunkeness thing is... tricky, as it may have been rape. Depends on the exact nature of the event in question. As for rape or...theft of semen (am I the only one who would think that is just surreal to consider?), ideally the state would step in as it does for natural disasters for which no person can be considered liable. In such a case, the ideal condition is of course that the mother would not have parental rights either, and the baby would be put up for adoption in their own best interests unless the presumptive father actively chose to raise it. However the laws have not caught up with the...strange nature of reality in that respect--and a child has an absolute right to be cared for by someone once it is born.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Broomstick »

Terralthra wrote:Actually, your position is that men, if they don't want to be fathers, should refrain from sex almost entirely, as basically every precaution a man could take is not foolproof, and your position is that if a precaution fails, it's still on the man to pay for the results.
Oh, please - exaggerate much? Have sex all you want, but wear a rubber even if she claims to be on the pill. For the vast majority of men this will avoid the problem. But do accept that if a child happens you can no longer walk away from it like in the old days.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Terralthra »

I love how you accuse me of exaggerating, then proceed to more or less confirm my summary of your position. Brilliant, really.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

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You equate wearing a condom with abstinence? How... deranged.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

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No, I don't. You equate sex with a condom with "irresponsible sex."

Sex with a condom can still result in pregnancy (in fact, it's the most failure-prone of modern birth control methods), and according to you, having sex with a chance of pregnancy resulting means simply accepting that if a kid comes along, that's your responsibility. Clearly, the only choice for a man who doesn't want a child is abstinence (or sex with verifiably post-menopausal women, one supposes). You say as much yourself: "But do accept that if a child happens you can no longer walk away from it like in the old days."

You're happy to have that be your position, unless it's phrased honestly. Then you claim I'm exaggerating.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Grandmaster Jogurt »

Jub wrote:Males of most species are designed to have sex with multiple things and as often as they can. It would stand to reason that this could create a higher sex drive. As near as I can tell research is still out on this, but we also don't study sex very intensively either.
If "the research is still out" then you don't make an assumption either way; you don't just base it off self-contradicting sexist stereotypes.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by energiewende »

Charging him with murder seems to seriously undermine the case for any legal abortion, if not destroy it entirely. The most he can be charged and remain consistent with the law would seem to be unlawful destruction of property.

I don't know if it is legally important in the US but it is in many countries: how does one appraise the monetary value of a fetus?
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

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Grandmaster Jogurt wrote:
Jub wrote:Males of most species are designed to have sex with multiple things and as often as they can. It would stand to reason that this could create a higher sex drive. As near as I can tell research is still out on this, but we also don't study sex very intensively either.
If "the research is still out" then you don't make an assumption either way; you don't just base it off self-contradicting sexist stereotypes.
I can look at other species that are closely related to humans and see that males have more sex. That's more evidence than the other side has.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

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You mean like bonobos, the most closely-related of all primates to humans, in which the females engage in sexual activity, either with males or with females, far more frequently than males alone?
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Broomstick »

Terralthra wrote:No, I don't. You equate sex with a condom with "irresponsible sex."
Not at all - it is more responsible than not using one.

See, the problem is that you and others here want a way to have sex with a young woman with a 100% guarantee of no pregnancy resulting - and that just isn't reality. You can significantly reduce the odds of that occurring but you can't entirely eliminate it assuming sex between fertile men and women.

Abstinence is not the only option - you can, as you note, have sex with a non-fertile women such as a post-menopausal one, have sex with someone of your own gender, or masturbate. I suppose there's also the option of animals but that is generally considered immoral and cruel to the animals, and is often outright illegal.

If none of those options are acceptable to you then I'm sorry, you have to simply accept that there is a non-zero risk of a pregnancy resulting from intercourse and if you can't convince the woman to abort or adopt out the kid you'll be on the hook for 18 years. Use birth control to reduce the risk of pregnancy and try to only fuck partners who would be willing to abort.

It's like STD's and sex - you can have safer sex, but not 100% safe sex if you're fucking another human being. Likewise, you can use birth control to make pregnancy less likely, but nothing is 100% conception-preventing if you're talking about fertile people of opposite genders.
Clearly, the only choice for a man who doesn't want a child is abstinence (or sex with verifiably post-menopausal women, one supposes).
... or sex with other men, or sex with inanimate objects, or sex with your hand, or oral sex with a woman...

Sorry you have a lack of imagination. It's right there with your inability to deal with reality.
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Terralthra »

Oral sex with a woman has a nonzero chance of pregnancy. Masturbation as sole sexual activity is generally called "abstinence", and the idea that men who don't want to have kids should just turn gay/bi is a suggestion I'd call ludicrous, except that it's coming from you, whence it's situation normal.

Nonetheless, I suppose I should concede that I misinterpreted your position. You do not espouse that a man seeking to avoid becoming a parent should be abstinent. You instead propose that a man seeking to avoid becoming a parent should be abstinent or change his sexual orientation.

:lol:
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Broomstick
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Broomstick »

Uh, dude, a woman's uterus is NOT connected to her throat. Nor does your spit contain sperm. Seriously, unless you youngsters have develop mouths in new places you CAN engage in oral sex with no risk of pregnancy. It does, of course, require some care you don't spray bodily fluids willy-nilly but I'm assuming normal coordination.

As for masturbation - it is a form of sex, whether you think it is or not.

Orientation? No, I'm not expecting you to change it, but it IS an option for those who are open to it.

Otherwise, yes, you will have to accept a non-zero chance of pregnancy if you fuck. Welcome to the real world, enjoy your stay.
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Terralthra
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Terralthra »

Broomstick wrote:Uh, dude, a woman's uterus is NOT connected to her throat. Nor does your spit contain sperm. Seriously, unless you youngsters have develop mouths in new places you CAN engage in oral sex with no risk of pregnancy. It does, of course, require some care you don't spray bodily fluids willy-nilly but I'm assuming normal coordination.
Bodily fluids can be transferred from one place to another. It's not a very likely thing, but it is a possibility, for men who are seriously trying to avoid any chance of pregnancy, especially since a woman who wants to get pregnant could easily do so deliberately.
Broomstick wrote:As for masturbation - it is a form of sex, whether you think it is or not.
Do you mean mutual masturbation (which has the same sort of very low, but non-zero risk of pregnancy as oral sex)? If you just mean masturbation, then I think people would still count someone who chooses to avoid sexual contact with other people in favor of masturbation as being abstinent, in the sexual sense.
Broomstick wrote:Orientation? No, I'm not expecting you to change it, but it IS an option for those who are open to it.
You keep making this about me, which is sort of hilarious. For me, it is an option to only have sex with other men, but I'm not talking about me, I'm talking about men in general.
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Jub
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Jub »

One question, if life isn't fair and women have the better options for birth control (the pill, IUD's, the loop, ext) all have a lower failure rate than a condom) why shouldn't men expect women to use such devices? It's a simple fact that these options exist for women but not for men just as it's a simple fact that women get pregnant instead of men. Should we not apply the life isn't fair standard to this and expect the sex with the better options to use them?

Or does this again only apply when it's men that have to face inconvenience due to the way nature and current methods of doing things works?

Also, do you support increased numbers of men asking women for anal as it greatly reduces that chance of the woman not getting pregnant?
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Terralthra
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Re: Douchebag tricks his girlfriend into taking abortion pil

Post by Terralthra »

Because most of those birth control methods have side effects, dude, in some cases serious.

Edit: they also don't do shit for STIs, unlike condoms, which help reduce infection risks.
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