Fun in Africa (Primer to African Fighting)

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Fun in Africa (Primer to African Fighting)

Post by MKSheppard » 2005-12-10 12:11am

Original post from _DR on www.ar15.com

Images from the battle for Monrovia, Liberia, where use of iron sights is known to be strictly prohibited. Also prohibited are aiming, assuming a supported firing stance, and any common practice of marksmanship whatsoever. Hip-Hop/Rapper/Gangsta shooting stances are mandatory, the "Glock Foh-Tay" hold being the most popular. lethality is acheived by subjecting the target to a wide swathe of area fire, simliar to unaimed indirect artillery, or scaring the enemy away with gesturing and aggressive hip-hop style dancing while firing. Points are awarded for artistic effort, style, fearsome facial expression/vocalizations and blue duct tape.

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Note perfectly executed flamboyant sideways-rifle "Glock Foh-Tay" running stance.

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Amazing height and style on this one. Sure to impress the judges!

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"Yo Yo YO, Fo' Shizzle"

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The "bring your buddy along" firing stance

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Firing from the hip while putting on the best "Game Face" and bellowing like an Ox - always sure to make your enemy skeedadle!

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The "Homeless street person" anti-aircraft firing position being executed with great precision!

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Here we have a classic! The "prone Warrior " firing position - too bad the magazine spring has blown out from the bottom of his beautifully blue-duct-tape-taped jungle magazine setup.

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Here we have Liberian militia demonstrating the "Soul Train" method of combat assault.

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The Nautical theme is ever popular, as seen by this militiaman wearing the stylish Kapok life jacket.
Won't stop a bullet, but sure looks Boo-yaa!

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This pair is executing the difficult "Phat Bammer Swagger" shooting stance.

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The Phat "Batman Begins" RPG firing position is new but hot.

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While this appears to be a well-rehearsed combat assault maneuver, this militiaman is actually trying to keep birds from crapping on his car. Note the feather duster in the left hand for effect.

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This Militiaman executes the one handed high overhead blind shot. It is often used to indicate that "Da Brizzles over there".

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And last but not least, these two are showing the proper way to fire a support weapon using the non-aiming duck-walk method, keeping at least five feet of linked ammo strung out from the weapon at any given time! Note the suitably awe-struck onlookers!

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Hardened child militia soldiers greet each other near front line positions as the offensive continues.

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A truckful of child soldiers prepare to charge a rebel position at a key bridge downtown, to smother the enemy with their bodies.

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A militia commander leads his men in a withering attack on rebels downtown.

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A young soldier attempts to reload under heavy incoming fire.

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A Liberian commander, left, orders a reluctant young soldier to charge into battle.

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A government militial commander fires a rocket at enemy positions, and then exults after his direct hit.

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A government militial commander fires a rocket at enemy positions, and then exults after his direct hit.

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Fighters turn away from battle and scream.

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A young child soldier walks away from shooting while another taunts the enemy over the bridge.

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A government soldier fires a burst at rebels. (The only man in Africa who knows what he's doing)

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Post by fgalkin » 2005-12-10 12:17am

:lol:

*can't...breathe* :lol:


Although I must say, as hilarious as it is, it belongs in AMP. Moved.

Have a very nice day.
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Post by Kettch » 2005-12-10 12:36am

Child soldiers :(

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Post by General Zod » 2005-12-10 12:37am

So wrong, yet so fucking funny.
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Post by Spanky The Dolphin » 2005-12-10 12:38am

Kettch wrote:Child soldiers :(
Such is the way of life.

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Post by Kuja » 2005-12-10 12:39am

:lol:

Shep, you can be damn funny when you want to be.
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Post by Spanky The Dolphin » 2005-12-10 12:41am

So can that one guy's gun even fire with the magazine spring popped out like that?

EDIT: Wait, what the hell am I asking, of course it can't...

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Post by MKSheppard » 2005-12-10 12:48am

Kuja wrote:Shep, you can be damn funny when you want to be.
I didn't write up the descriptions, DR_ did on AR15.com I'm making it accessible to a wider base

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Post by HemlockGrey » 2005-12-10 12:48am

What? WHAT? Why the fuck were we pussying around back during the height of the civil war? We sent in like 200 Marines to clear out the embassy, right? Fuck that! 200 Marines versus these clowns would have been like Patton's Third Army against Julius Caesar's retarded cousin! Christ, Cobra Commander could handle those guys.
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Post by Beowulf » 2005-12-10 01:02am

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:So can that one guy's gun even fire with the magazine spring popped out like that?

EDIT: Wait, what the hell am I asking, of course it can't...
Well... it can fire... once.
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Post by Edward Yee » 2005-12-10 03:59am

I can't tell you the demographics of the pictured (i.e. which were rebels and which were government), but this is the third time I've seen this, oh gosh.

I cannot confirm or deny the speculation on "ARFCOM" that the feather duster and (see link) the Mickey Mouse handbag were intended as (I kid you not) magic charms... nor that the huge sunglasses, the flaming pink wig, the monster masks, the black wig and the dress were intended to confuse Death...
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Post by Winston Blake » 2005-12-10 06:25am

I was trying to be sympathetic to the whole child soldier stuff and everything, but when i got to the guy will the spring popped out i just couldn't take it any more. It's like something out of a roadrunner cartoon. If, you know, Wile E. Coyote liked AKs.

Can anybody tell me what the advantages are of taping the magazine like that by the guy in last pic (as opposed to in-line like the villain in True Lies)?

Also Edward, your Mickey Mouse Handbag link is broken. That i've gotta see. :)
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Post by The Guid » 2005-12-10 11:52am

War...hooo.... yeah... what is it good for?

Apparently making people laugh. Yeah, great people...
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Post by Ace Pace » 2005-12-10 02:27pm

General Zod wrote:So wrong, yet so fucking funny.
Seconded. :D
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Post by SyntaxVorlon » 2005-12-10 05:18pm

Yeah, a bunch of kids going to get themselves killed/kill other people. Hilarious. You should do standup, you'll have'm hanging themselves from the rafters.
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Post by Edward Yee » 2005-12-10 06:16pm

Firing from the hip while putting on the best "Game Face" and bellowing like an Ox - always sure to make your enemy skeedadle!
Actually, there have been mentions on the ARFCOM thread that, well, that's the damn point.

Oh, as also said there -- the guy in the background... "shooting cockroaches"?

For Mickey Mouse guy, go here and scroll just over halfway down the page.

The flipped-over magazine taping may just be style or habit. Then again, the guy with the cap over his eyes has four magazines taped together...

The Guid, SyntaxVorlon -- yes, it is. General Zod summed it up.
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Post by Ypoknons » 2005-12-10 06:38pm

It's funny, but sometimes, must people always talk about the stupidity of others? You put a gun on a farmboy, and this is what happens. Makes them heroic, in some ways.

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Post by Spanky The Dolphin » 2005-12-10 07:02pm

SyntaxVorlon wrote:Yeah, a bunch of kids going to get themselves killed/kill other people. Hilarious. You should do standup, you'll have'm hanging themselves from the rafters.
It's better than being humourless bleeding hearts...

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Post by Anarchist Bunny » 2005-12-10 07:27pm

Looks like they all graduated from the Vogon School of Marksmenship.
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Post by The Guid » 2005-12-10 08:51pm

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:
SyntaxVorlon wrote:Yeah, a bunch of kids going to get themselves killed/kill other people. Hilarious. You should do standup, you'll have'm hanging themselves from the rafters.
It's better than being humourless bleeding hearts...
Indeed. Just because people don't laugh at misery and death they're probably real sour grapes aren't they?
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Post by fgalkin » 2005-12-10 09:03pm

The Guid wrote:
Spanky The Dolphin wrote:
SyntaxVorlon wrote:Yeah, a bunch of kids going to get themselves killed/kill other people. Hilarious. You should do standup, you'll have'm hanging themselves from the rafters.
It's better than being humourless bleeding hearts...
Indeed. Just because people don't laugh at misery and death they're probably real sour grapes aren't they?
We're not laughing at misery and death. We're laughing at the incompetence of the African "armies"

Have a very nice day.
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Post by J » 2005-12-10 09:21pm

Those captions are beyond brilliant. I'm laughing despite how wrong it is... :lol:
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Post by Darth Wong » 2005-12-10 09:24pm

Ypoknons wrote:It's funny, but sometimes, must people always talk about the stupidity of others? You put a gun on a farmboy, and this is what happens. Makes them heroic, in some ways.
No self-respecting farmer would hold a gun like that. That's a result of drugs, exported American movies, and stupidity.

But I'm speaking of the adults; I think that whole segment would be funnier without the kids in it.
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Post by Mr Bean » 2005-12-10 09:24pm

fgalkin wrote:
The Guid wrote:
Spanky The Dolphin wrote: It's better than being humourless bleeding hearts...
Indeed. Just because people don't laugh at misery and death they're probably real sour grapes aren't they?
We're not laughing at misery and death. We're laughing at the incompetence of the African "armies"

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin
Pretty much, heck even Rambo movies had him aim down the sight once in awhile.

Idiots with guns who are fighting urban combat. They are shit in every sense of the word except for the advantages of home terrian and the fact there are alot of them. A single USMC Battalion could cleave through them if they were dumb enough to stand and fight.

Also as Mike noted above, Farmboys know how to aim as their aim determines what they get to put on the dinner table in some areas. Our first snipers came from the farmboy ranks.

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Post by Dalton » 2005-12-10 10:32pm

Darth Wong wrote:
Ypoknons wrote:It's funny, but sometimes, must people always talk about the stupidity of others? You put a gun on a farmboy, and this is what happens. Makes them heroic, in some ways.
No self-respecting farmer would hold a gun like that. That's a result of drugs, exported American movies, and stupidity.

But I'm speaking of the adults; I think that whole segment would be funnier without the kids in it.
And without the racist commentary.
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