World's Funniest Cultist Strikes Again!

OT: anything goes!

Moderator: Edi

Post Reply
User avatar
fgalkin
Carvin' Marvin
Posts: 14557
Joined: 2002-07-03 11:51pm
Location: Land of the Mountain Fascists
Contact:
Contact fgalkin

World's Funniest Cultist Strikes Again!

Post by fgalkin »

Another message from JAMES MCDOUGLASS KWOK WAH LI, BABY GOD, MAN-CHILD, KING OF KINGS, 999, MESSIAH

(I couldn't find the other thread. Sorry)
In the past, I am Christian, but now I am the Creator of the religion called the FORCE. I am not a Christian now. My SuperReligion is called the FORCE. I am going to write a book called the Modern Testament, the last big section in the Bible.

The Old Testament, New Testament and my book, Modern Testament are the Trilogy. In the Bible, it mentions my book, as the Book of Life.

I called up the Department of the Energy of the United States to inform them about a new SuperEnergy, whether they like it or not.

I told this guy called Eric that if we are lucky enough we might see the SECOND SUN in the sky, the experimental proof of the power of the Dragon Bomb in outer space.

IMPORTANT: I am not a Christian. I am the first follower of the religion called the FORCE in the world.

My book called the Modern Testament will explain everything in the Old Testament and the New Testament, in terms of SuperSciences.

{handwritten} King of Kings, 999, Messiah. (212) 964-1897
The Modern Testament, coming to bookstores everywhere this fall. :lol:

I'm almost tempted to call him.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin
Top
User avatar
Rye
To Mega Therion
Posts: 12493
Joined: 2003-03-08 07:48am
Location: Uighur, please!

Post by Rye »

:lol:

You should, though I now doubt the man is an insane as he'd have us believe:
I told this guy called Eric
That part piqued my intuition. Still, full credit to him, it's damn funny.
EBC|Fucking Metal|Artist|Androgynous Sexfiend|Gozer Kvltist|
Listen to my music! http://www.soundclick.com/nihilanth
"America is, now, the most powerful and economically prosperous nation in the country." - Master of Ossus
Top
User avatar
Einhander Sn0m4n
Insane Railgunner
Posts: 18630
Joined: 2002-10-01 05:51am
Location: Louisiana... or Dagobah. You know, where Yoda lives.

Post by Einhander Sn0m4n »

WWYD

What Would Yoda Do?
Image Image
Top
User avatar
General Zod
Never Shuts Up
Posts: 29205
Joined: 2003-11-18 03:08pm
Location: The Clearance Rack
Contact:
Contact General Zod

Post by General Zod »

where's the site located, just out of curiosity? hilarious stuff otherwise. :D
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
Top
Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi
What Kind of Username is That?
Posts: 9254
Joined: 2002-07-10 08:53pm
Location: Back in PA

Post by Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi »

I say we all encourage him to expand his new "SuperReligion" with more pamphlets, just so everyone can laugh at him some more.

I especially love how he keeps repeating how he's not a Christian anymore, and putting a whole bunch of things after his name, so it ends up like "Me, 999, Messiah, Baby God, King of Kings, Manchild, Fucking Lunatic".
BotM: Just another monkey|HAB
Top
User avatar
fgalkin
Carvin' Marvin
Posts: 14557
Joined: 2002-07-03 11:51pm
Location: Land of the Mountain Fascists
Contact:
Contact fgalkin

Post by fgalkin »

Darth_Zod wrote:where's the site located, just out of curiosity? hilarious stuff otherwise. :D
There is no site. Apparently, he is too dumb to use a computer. Badly-made pamphlets are all we have.

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin
Top
User avatar
Solauren
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 10199
Joined: 2003-05-11 09:41pm

Post by Solauren »

I'd say Lucasarts should legally ass-rape this guy, but stupidity isn't a crime....
Top
User avatar
Peregrin Toker
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8609
Joined: 2002-07-04 10:57am
Location: Denmark
Contact:
Contact Peregrin Toker

Post by Peregrin Toker »

I'd say Lucasarts should legally ass-rape this guy, but stupidity isn't a crime....
The similarities aren't that numerous.... there's a thing called "The Force" and mention of a Holy Trilogy - but that's about that.
"Hi there, would you like to have a cookie?"

"No, actually I would HATE to have a cookie, you vapid waste of inedible flesh!"
Top
User avatar
Zaia
Inamorata
Posts: 13983
Joined: 2002-10-23 03:04am
Location: Londontowne

Re: World's Funniest Cultist Strikes Again!

Post by Zaia »

JAMES MCDOUGLASS KWOK WAH LI, etc. wrote:I called up the Department of the Energy of the United States to inform them about a new SuperEnergy, whether they like it or not.
Bwahahaha, that's my favourite bit. :D
"On the infrequent occasions when I have been called upon in a formal place to play the bongo drums, the introducer never seems to find it necessary to mention that I also do theoretical physics." -Richard Feynman
Top
User avatar
Frank Hipper
Overfiend of the Superego
Posts: 12882
Joined: 2002-10-17 08:48am
Location: Hamilton, Ohio?

Post by Frank Hipper »

This guy's schizophrenic, or a meth burn-out.
Entertaining, but sad, too.
Image
Life is all the eternity you get, use it wisely.
Top
User avatar
Peregrin Toker
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8609
Joined: 2002-07-04 10:57am
Location: Denmark
Contact:
Contact Peregrin Toker

Post by Peregrin Toker »

Frank Hipper wrote:This guy's schizophrenic, or a meth burn-out.
Entertaining, but sad, too.
You're sure he's not a hoaxer?
"Hi there, would you like to have a cookie?"

"No, actually I would HATE to have a cookie, you vapid waste of inedible flesh!"
Top
User avatar
Frank Hipper
Overfiend of the Superego
Posts: 12882
Joined: 2002-10-17 08:48am
Location: Hamilton, Ohio?

Post by Frank Hipper »

Peregrin Toker wrote:
Frank Hipper wrote:This guy's schizophrenic, or a meth burn-out.
Entertaining, but sad, too.
You're sure he's not a hoaxer?
Well, that's not impossible, but it certainly wasn't the first thing that comes to mind.
I imagine him as one step away from being an incoherent, raving homeless person swaddled in 6 layers of clothing on a summer day, clearing the way for himself with an aura of stench as he screams "999, the number of THE FORCE!!!!"...
Image
Life is all the eternity you get, use it wisely.
Top
User avatar
General Zod
Never Shuts Up
Posts: 29205
Joined: 2003-11-18 03:08pm
Location: The Clearance Rack
Contact:
Contact General Zod

Post by General Zod »

Peregrin Toker wrote:
Frank Hipper wrote:This guy's schizophrenic, or a meth burn-out.
Entertaining, but sad, too.
You're sure he's not a hoaxer?
either way it's entertaining.
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
Top
User avatar
fgalkin
Carvin' Marvin
Posts: 14557
Joined: 2002-07-03 11:51pm
Location: Land of the Mountain Fascists
Contact:
Contact fgalkin

Post by fgalkin »

He returns!
THE POWER OF THE {FORCE} WILL CHANGE ALL MEDICINES IN THE ENTIRE WORLD IN THE FUTURE. THE CHINESE DRAGON WILL REPLACE THE SNAKE IN THE SYMBOL OF MEDICINE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. 999

CHINESE DRAGON IS THE SYMBOL OF CHINESE EMPEROR. IF EVERYTHING FAILS IN ELIMINATING CANCERS, AIDS, AND OTHER DISEASES, THE ONLY HOPE IS THE {FORCE}

James MacDouglas Kwok Wah Li

KING OF KINGS, MESSIAH
Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin
Top
Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi
What Kind of Username is That?
Posts: 9254
Joined: 2002-07-10 08:53pm
Location: Back in PA

Post by Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi »

I like how he demonstrates the sheer potential of his SuperReligion by saying "THE CHINESE DRAGON WILL REPLACE THE SNAKE IN THE SYMBOL OF MEDICINE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD.", and putting "999" after that for no reason. I say you should personally contact this guy so you can find out more, and tell us about it.
BotM: Just another monkey|HAB
Top
Post Reply

Return to “Off-Topic”