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 Post subject: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-24 02:39pm 

Hmm.. let us say the Seven Gods of Westeros, not wanting to be upstaged by that pussy Rh'lhor decide to take a more active hand in the events of A Song of Ice and Fire, and employ you as their agent. The time period is right after Game of Thrones before/during the begining of Clash of Kings, so the people who just watched the show can participate. You may manifest (as a mysterious hooded figure) to any one character and give him or her a single divine gift: one of the Twelve Swords from the Book of Swords.

If you didn't read that series, first, read the series. If you're too stubborn for that, here's the skinny:

Townsaver: Sword of Heroes, when drawn in defense of others possesses the wielder. While possessed, the person shall have unnatural speed, strength and skill. the wielder of Townsaver cannot drop the sword until the innocent are safe, and he cannot die in that time either, fighting through extraordinary wounds. However, the moment the danger is passed, one may finally die. People who use Townsaver tend to get injured a lot, since the sword will compell them to protect the innocent, even if that means taking an arrow for them.
When wielded with malicious purpose, or merely in self-defense, Townsaver has no special powers and is merely a very sharp, perfectly balanced, indestructible blade.

Woundhealer: Sword of Mercy, has no power to injure or kill. Instead, everyone struck with this sword is healed of injuries, cured of disease. It can even regenerate limbs and generally heal all things short of death. This is done by sticking the sword into people. Woundhealer works as a normal sword against inanimate objects.

Coinspinner: Sword of Fortune, grants incredible luck to it's owner. All gambles pay off, he is never harmed etc. Everything that can go right, will go right, and his enemies shall be ever frustrated. However, fortune is fickle and the sword will inevitably be lost, stolen, or simply vanish one night. After losing the sword, the scales are balanced by a period of incredible ill-fortune. However, in this instance the sword is a divine gift, so it will always find its way back to the person you entrust it to. Eventually.

Dragonslicer: This sword also gives great skill to the wielder, though no special protection. Whoever uses this sword against a dragon will find it unerringly seeks the heart of the beast, and cleaves the flesh and bone of dragons as easily as warm butter. When wielded against non-draconic foes the sword has no special powers and is just a very sharp, perfectly balanced, indestructible blade.

Stonecutter: Sword of Siege, cuts through stone with ease, no matter the thickness or density. Can bring down castle walls. When wielded against things besides rocks it has no special powers but remains a very sharp, perfectly balanced, indestructible blade.

Doomgiver: Sword of Judgement, reflects all attacks against its master. Arrows spin about and fly back to their archers, swords turn on the men that swing them, wild animals eat each other up or savage themselves with their own claws and teeth. All malicious magics are reflected back on the caster.

Shieldbreaker: Sword of Force, takes control of its wielder's sword arm, giving that limb superhuman strength and speed while weakening the rest of the body. Shieldbreaker never fails to parry or block an attack, and whatever weapon touches the sword is immediatly and explosively shattered. However, the sword will pass harmlessly through an unarmed man. Shieldbreaker protects its owner from all hostile magics.

Wayfinder: Sword of Wisdom, can answer any simple questions asked of it with a quiver. It can also be used to point someone in the direction they need to travel to acheive their objectives. However, beware, for Wayfinder will generally ignore the safer paths to you goal, and this tendency sharply increases the more you try and lawyer it with very specific objectives.

Sightblinder: Sword of Stealth, greatly increases the sight and hearing of its owner, allowing them to see through disguises and illusions. When used actively, it cloaks the wielder in a perfect illusion, that the victims can't even question, of them being someone whoever looks at them either loves and trusts implicitly, or fears absolutely. SOmeitmes the illusion seen can change from one minute to the next.

Farslayer: Sword of Vengeance, when thrown with a name will fly across the world if need be, passing through clouds, stone walls, dimensional barriers, wards, or people in the way with equal ease until it buries itself in its named victim's heart. Where it stays, until someone picks it up.

Skulltwister: Sword of Madness, when drawn flashes with a brilliant light and roars with the voice of a mighty crowd. All who see or hear this display become immediatly, fanatically loyal to the wielder. They would gladly die for him/her. However, unless renewed this effect wears off after a week or so.

Soulcutter: Sword of Tyrants, when bared all within its range, including the wielder, fall into a deep depression, losing all will to live. They lie in one place until the elements, starvation or thirst takes them, or the sword is somehow sheathed due to outside intervention. This range covers a good-sized battlefield, or a small city.

As a second scenario, you are given all twelve blades and told to distribute them among the book's characters as you see fit. Whatever will you do?

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-24 02:51pm 

I only wish to comment that then making this a sword-shaped object is downright hilariously counter-productive.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-24 04:00pm 

I'd try and give Stannis Skulltwister prior to Renly's death. His biggest hindrance is that people don't like him, but if he can make a show and immediately get all of the South on his side, he'd take King's Landing no problem.

And with his character, the sword, and the most legitimate claim to the throne, I think he'd keep it and be able to come to an agreement with the North.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-24 06:34pm 

Off the top of my head, Caitlyn would be given Farslayer, Brienne Pathfinder, Daenerys Dragonslicer, Edmund Tully Townsaver and Jaime Shieldbreaker. But I would ensure that the rumor got out to the Northerners that Shieldbreaker cannot harm those who attack the bearer unarmed. Also, from what I remember of the book of swords, you can wear armor while wielding Townsaver and really only have to worry about exhaustion as most of the wounds that get past the sword are tiny and the user usually succumbs to a thousand paper cuts instead of one great blow.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-24 09:39pm 

Woundhealer heals the injuries you get from stabbing a person with Woundmaker as well. There are a couple instances of people sticking the sword in their chest right before doing something insanely dangerous, like run into a burning building or jump off a cliff, secure in the knowledge that they are now very hard to kill.

Or did you mean people would assume it to be a normal sword and try and use it that way? you can explain to the person you give the blade to what it does. Or that your allies are probably not going to want to let you stab their injured persons?



That is generally how Townsaver works, yes.

But please, don't just tell us who you'd give a sword/all the swords to. Tell us why. Why give Dani, the person least likely to fight dragons a dragon-slaying sword? Is it just to keep anyone else from having it? Edmund Tully is a fine pick for Townsaver, but why give Jaime Shieldbreaker? Why give Wayfinder to Brienne? Is there something specific you're trying to accomplish or do you just want to see who does what with the sword's powers?

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 02:00am 

I think he just want to know whether of the following characters are best to suit using the swords. Or might be just doing some leisure stuffs.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 04:48am 

An item of incredible healing power is shaped into an item that is meant to be used to kill people. Yes, I do find that a bit counter-productive (which is what I meant to write). You can't use the sword to hurt people, so why have it as a sword anyway?

Unless it has special power against undead or something.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 10:19am 

Oh, the choices are completely based on fanboy desire. Edmund Tully is a great choice for Townsaver as he is undersiege for almost the entirety of the series once the war breaks out.

Dani with Dragonslicer means the one person with a vested interest now controls the best means to kill them, there by preventing, say the Maesters, from grabbing the sword off who holds it and employing it effectively.

Caitlyn with Farslayer is just to see which Lannister she brings down with her one shot.

Brienne and a sword that finds what your looking for should make sense.

And Jaimie and Shieldbreaker just because he is the type that would flaunt its use in battle and then get taken down by some mook who lost his weapons.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 01:17pm 

What exactly are these swords from? I read all 5 ASOIAF books and I didn't see anything about fancy-ass swords in them except for the flaming ones that Stannis Baratheon and whatshisface, the lord that keeps getting killed, have from R'hllor priests... Is this something they introduced in the TV series or what?

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 01:36pm 

From another fantasy series entirely, the Book of Swords. The question is 'what would you do if you could give the swords from Book of Swords to the cahracters in ASOIAF?'

I could as easily ask what you'd do if you could give a character Excaliber, except that these blades have very specific powers.

And what are all the named Valyrian-steel blades if not "fancy-ass swords?"

For myself, I think I'd give Wayfinder to Tyrion. It's just too tempting to see what he'd do with the ability to have any yes or no questions truthfully answered.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 01:58pm 

From the Book of Swords series by Fred Saberhagen.

Spoiler tagged in case we have TV-Series-Only folks.



edited for brain-farts

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 02:26pm 

Stannis gets Skulltwister (my sole pick for the one-sword scenario). Davos, on the other hand, gets Doomgiver.

Why? Because I want Stannis to win the Game, but he needs a conscience. Preferably one Melisandre can't disappear. Davos is one of the few characters noble enough to use effective invincibility sensibly, and he will act as a good counter-weight to the red lady's fanaticism. I think it fairly obvious that Stannis with fanatic followers would be a terror sufficient to gain the throne. Hell, all he'd have to do is keep Renly around him and unsheath the sword in front of him regularly.

Townsaver? Tough one. It would be fun to give it to Sandor Clegane - see if he'd be a hero when the price for it is effectively lowered. Doubtful, though. Better idea - Beric Dondarrion! He's protector of the smallfolk, and this could allow him to effectively end the reign of Tywin's mad dogs. Should probably give Woundhealer to Thoros while I'm at it.

Although - given the mission of the Night's Watch, wouldn't Townsaver effectively work until they'd wiped out the Others and wildlings? If so, Mormont SO gets the nod.

Stonecutter goes to Robb Stark - this lets him break the stalemate at the beginning of CoK with Tywin in Harrenhall. Slice that sucker right open and neutralize Tywin Lannister.

Coinspinner strikes me as something useful for someone smart enough to use it for a brief series of actions right now then ignore it when they're done, lest they build up a foundation that goes sour once they lose the sword. No battles or long campaigns, but people who are in a position to influence a lot in a short time. That means schemers - Tyrion, Littlefinger or Varys. I think Tyrion - gods know the guy's used to having streaks of good luck followed by shit, so he could adapt more easily. Varys, obviously, gets Sightblinder - it's perfect for how he operates.

Dragonslayer goes to the Martells - they're Dany's natural allies, so having a sword that can neutralize her Big Thing is VERY useful to keep her in check.

Wayfinder and Shieldbreaker go to Brienne of Tarth. The Maid is the classic noble knight on a quest, so it makes sense for her to have a sword that points her to her objectives and a unbeatable sword for when it's necessary. Granted, if Renly lives then she might just stick with him. Why on earth would somebody want to give Shieldbreaker to Jaime? The man needs more incentive to be a swaggering thug?

Farslayer and Soulcutter are doomsday weapons - a dead man's switch for when things go to shit. Give them to a Maester with strict instructions to watch and observe, but not interfere unless things turn really dire. Would anyone we've met in the books qualify? Maybe the Maester Sam meets at the end of AFFC?

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 02:31pm 

DAMNIT, stop anticipating me! I'm writing an all-swords scenario and we think too much alike.

As another point of agreement I'd give Farslayer to Maester Aemon--he still has a good year or two to live at this point, has proven his restraint more than anyone else in the books, and if he dies on schedule the sword will pass to Sam after he's had a couple books to grow up.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 03:09pm 

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 03:31pm 

Remember that you need an end objective in mind. When writing my scenario, it was to save Westeros from the Others - hence trying to structure things around a quickly-united Seven Kingdoms and having Dany become powerful, but not dominant.

Thus you have two sane forces led by adults who are most likely to believe the stories about the Others left as the great powers of the region. That's a pretty good chance.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-25 10:26pm 

True, but in the abscence of a well-reasoned plan for influencing the fate of the world, I'll cheerfully accept the desire to poke the hornet's nest and see what happens. Kind of hard to find twelve people worthy or wise enough to be given the swords who are all on more or less the same side anyways.

I should probably explain some of the interactions of the swords for the all-swords scenario, I'd assumed the series was well-known enough it wouldn't be needed. Doomgiver and Shieldbreaker are the swords most noted for their ability to protect the wielder from the other swords, by reflecting their powers or destroying them. Shieldbreaker has the power to destroy the other swords, except for Coinspinner which is never where it would need to be to be found and destroyed, and Woundhealer which isn't really a weapon. Yes, even Doomgiver. Mostly this means Shieldbreaker and Doomgiver can protect one from the powers of Farslayer, Skulltwister, Soulcutter, and Sightblinder.

Sightblinder can give a person a fighting chance to resist the effects of Skulltwister and Soulcutter, but they need to have a strong will to pull it off.

Woundhealer can be used on the victims of Soulcutter and Skulltwister, it won't make them immune or immediatly cure them, but if you can get them away from the weapon's effect it can make them recover a whole lot faster.

Swords of Power can be dual-wielded, but it takes an experienced user of both swords, with a strong will and a certain personality, not too sensitive, very resistant to influence. Even then, the swords in question need to be compatible to an extent, so it's very rare.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-26 02:23am 

Christ, they must have invented Excel tables early on in that world to keep that shit straight.

So - would Townslayer effectively work in any situation for a member of the Night's Watch, so long as it's in the context of sticking to their oaths? A man is curious.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-26 05:59am 

I'd give Woundhealer to Joffrey, because it would be funny watching the little bastard trying to kill people and instead just making them better.

Seriously though, aside from being gay, thus lowering chances of an heir, how good of a choice would Renly be as king of the realm? So I'd probably give him Doomgiver. With a weapon like that, he can't lose.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-26 06:58am 

Renly? He's a nothing choice, really - firmly under the thumb of the Tyrells, who are most of his power base. From there it's really unknown - we haven't seen them do anything but scheme.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-26 01:14pm 

I don't think the sword works on that abstract a level, no. In the books it was used when the people to be protected were in immediate phyiscal danger.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-27 06:21am 

Renly had the same problem as Robert; he was more in love with the trappings of rulership and the pageantry than the actual administration. Only someone like Ned or Stannis would've had the strength and sense of duty to keep King's Landing in line and rule justly.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-27 07:39am 

Yeah, but that's happened quite a lot - Hands and lords run the realm while the king is fucking around.

So the question of Renly really comes down to the question of the Tyrells, which we have zero info on.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-27 02:26pm 

Bear in mind, I'm up to the last 200 pages of SoS and I have all the books so far. I'll try to keep spoilers to a minimum, though, for the TV crowd.
In both the one sword and all-sword scenario, I'm giving Robb Doomgiver. I want him to . . . succeed.

All swords:

Townsaver: Edmure Tully. He's a decent enough guy and he can certainly put it to good use.
Woundhealer: Sansa. I really don't know who else should have it and she deserves a small edge.
Coinspinner: Petyr Baelish. The most powerful man in Westeros: a pile of corpses. The look on his face when it all comes tumbling down around him: priceless.
Dragonslicer: Jon Snow. For . . . later.
Stonecutter: Stannis. Let the baby have a bottle and get rid of Joffrey for me.
Doomgiver: Robb. See above.
Shieldbreaker: Oberyn Martell. He can put it to a real good use.
Wayfinder: Tyrion. With instructions that the sword won't necessarily make things easy for him.
Sightblinder: Arya. For . . . later.
Farslayer: Davos. For . . . later.
Skulltwister: Berric Dondarrion. He can put it to real good use.
Soulcrusher: Walder Frey. "Show it off, show it to your family!"

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-27 02:29pm 

Stannis? Rule justly? No. Stannis is a combination of schizophrenia and obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. That's not justice; it's madness.

 Post subject: Re: Pick a sword, pick a wielder.

Posted: 2011-10-27 02:50pm 

I'll grant you the OCD, but why schizophrenic.

And while we may differ on whether he's just, he has a code and he is consistent to the point of inhumanity with it. He is incorruptible and sees it as his duty to rule Westeros according to the law of the land. If I did terrible things like play D&D, I'd say he was Lawful Neutral.

Why do I think this makes him a good king? Because, he respects the concept of the state - of being beholden to the law, not the other way around. And he will punish corruption wherever he sees it. Also, I just personally like the guy for not wanting power