Academia Nut wrote:Wait until you see the rest of it. But yeah, the combination of Chaos Space Marines and Haruhi (that's going to give me nightmares) made me think of the Lady of Awesome, and I immediately figured I should post that bit in the hopes that it might catalyze final crystallization of Soryu's idea. Although from the addition of the Covenant, the Haruhi-ism is probably a bit more theologically militant than the Konige's religion. I can even see our two factions being capable of allying at times but often suffering from "different perspectives on theology".
Your treatise on Konige theology was definitely a factor in the final crystallization of my idea, yes. I can definitely go with a partially shared background for our two factions.
A History of Haruhiism in the Terran Empire
The history of Haruhiism is long and convoluted. It is a tale of convergence, of how various unrelated parts can come together to form a greater whole. Above all else, it is a tale of how the lines between fact and fiction can be blurred and how life and art can imitate each other in the most bizarre ways possible.
Pre-Terran Empire
In 1989, a girl was born in Nishinomiya, Hyogo Prefecture, Japan. She would not know it, but she would prove to be pivotal to events in a far future she could only have dreamed of. Her name? Haruhi Suzumiya.
In 2003, when Haruhi was still in junior high, author Nagaru Tanigawa would publish the first of the novels that would make him famous. She viewed these works with some manner of mild amusement, passively observing as these books snowballed into a television adaptation and eventually spawned a religion all their own. In the meantime, life went on for Haruhi herself; she graduated from high school and then from college with the highest honors the Japanese educational system could bestow, entered the work force, and generally did the best she could to live as extraordinary and unique a life as she could.
As the years dragged on, Haruhi found herself in a situation not unlike that of Kane, Connor MacLeod, or the God-Emperor of Man: She was unaging and undying. For years, she wandered the Earth, doing extraordinary things and living the unique life she had always wanted. She watched as humanity reached for the stars and beyond, spreading its influence to distant worlds. She watched as Earth united under one government to form the Holy Solar Empire of Fortress Terra. She would not foresee the role she would eventually come to play in the game that was being set up, however.
The Terran Empire
The Lords of Metal and the Great Hiatus
The
Metalkönige, or "Lords of Metal," were the descendants of the first wave of human interstellar colonization. They resisted the authority of Fortress Terra, and for that they were banished to a region of space known as the Deadlands, a dead zone carved out to shield Terran territories from potential xeno threats.
While Könige culture revolves around heavy metal, there are lots of other things they find Awesome. Take animation, for instance. Giant robots blowing each other up, stylized gun and sword fights, epic spaceship battles, and hot women are all naturally Awesome (as long as they're done right), and the Könige recognize that fact. When members of a Könige raiding party discovered a
Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya anthology among the ruins of a world they had just pillaged, they immediately started spreading its gospel to their comrades. With a host of attractive characters, its humorous content, and its fair share of Awesome fight scenes, what was there to hate?
However, with the introduction of
Haruhi, a few Könige took the concept of Haruhiism a bit too literally for their own good. In the distant past, Haruhiism was nothing but a pseudoreligion, a massive in-joke between fans of the franchise; now, heretical Rückers were preaching that Haruhi Suzumiya was the Lady of Awesome incarnate, among a great many other statements that would make a 21st-century otaku shake his head and say to himself, "Just what the fuck is
wrong with these people?"
The deification of the SOS Brigade was only the beginning. While standard Könige religious doctrine did not call for forced proselytization, the self-proclaimed Haruhiists took it upon themselves to spread the gospel of Haruhi by any means necessary, even at the point of a gun or sword. Haruhiists and orthodox Könige soon found themselves at odds with each other, and what followed was a brief yet highly destructive civil war. Nobody knows who fired the first shot, but in any case, the de facto leaders of the Haruhiists soon decided that going to war with their fellow Könige was totally not Awesome and tried to negotiate a truce with the orthodox Rückers; when the final terms of the truce were finally agreed upon, Könige society went back to
status quo ante bellum, and the Haruhiists left and did their own thing.
The exile of the Haruhiists from the Metalkönige would come to be known as the Great Hiatus. Since the Hiatus, the Haruhiists and the orthodox Könige have engaged in countless snipes and jabs at each other, with each side blaming the other for causing the schism. While they have been known to collaborate with each other against common threats, such alliances are rare and almost always rapidly disintegrate once the threat has passed; while most confrontations between Haruhiists and orthodox Könige never exceed the level of (extremely heated) verbal combat, whenever prime real estate or loot is at stake, both sides are more than willing to come to blows over these spoils.
The Corruption of the Fleets and the Path to Godhood
During the second age of colonization, Fortress Terra dispatched its nigh-infinite Battle Fleets to reclaim its lost territories, to pacify any and all xeno threats, and to prepare other planets for further colonization. Three of these fleets, the 7th, the 14th, and the 49th, were dispatched to a region of space bordering the Deadlands to confront the so-called "Data Integration Thought Entity." The supreme commander of this expedition was none other than Haruhi Suzumiya herself, now a full-fledged Admiral in the Imperial Navy; she had joined the Imperial Navy when it was first formed and soon established herself as one of its greatest officers, putting centuries of hard-earned strategic knowledge and wisdom to use against the enemies of Fortress Terra.
The 7th, 14th, and 49th Fleets arrived at their destination, with Haruhi's flagship
Mystérique Sign leading the way; expecting to be greeted by a fully armed enemy fleet, she was surprised to find only a lone diplomatic shuttle waiting for her. It was then that she gave the most fateful decision of her career: she admitted the shuttle onboard the
Mystérique Sign and personally greeted the ambassadors of the Thought Entity. What shocked Haruhi was that the Thought Entity's ambassadors resembled two women she knew in high school long ago--Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura--and that they identified themselves as such. Admiral Suzumiya was then treated to a dry and lengthy lecture on how the Data Integration Entity had been interested in her from day one, how Yuki and Ryoko had been dispatched to observe her life as it unfolded, and how they they had been recalled when the Terran Empire was formed; instead of coming back to Haruhi, Yuki and Ryoko were ordered by their superiors to have Haruhi come to them instead, thus leading to the lecture that the admiral was being forced to sit through.
This whole experience was highly disconcerting for Admiral Suzumiya, to say the least; suffice to say that her life was imitating art (or was art imitating her life?) a bit too closely for its own good. The cherry that topped this hot fudge sundae of confusion was Ryoko's revelation that there was an entire civilization of human barbarians that revered Haruhi Suzumiya the fictional character as a goddess; needless to say, Haruhi Suzumiya the living person was intrigued by this new development. Considering how closely her life coincided with Nagaru Tanigawa's writings and Kyoto Animation's TV show, this was a golden opportunity, and she leapt at it; she had always wanted to know what it was like to be a god.
The Ascension of Haruhi Suzumiya
Admiral Suzumiya reported back to her superiors that the Integrated Data Entity posed no threat to Fortress Terra and that they would actually be of help in putting down a certain group of pesky barbarians; trusting the admiral's judgment, her superiors consented and allowed her to take the 14th and 49th Imperial Battle Fleets to the Deadlands to deal with the Haruhiist menace once and for all (the 7th Fleet was needed elsewhere at the time). Of course, the Admiral had no intention of exterminating the Haruhiists; she was going to set herself up as the physical incarnation of their god, and the Data Integration Thought Entity was going to lead her to that goal.
Yuki and Ryoko provided Admiral Suzumiya with the general coordinates of the region of the Deadlands that the Haruhiists were living in. It didn't take long for the Admiral to locate a Haruhiist world, and her establishment of dominance over the local population was ensured by the mere mention of her name alone; this process was repeated for every world with a Haruhiist presence on it. Before long, Haruhi found herself in command of two full-sized Imperial Battle Fleets, two agents of a powerful alien intelligence, and an entire civilization of barbarians ready to fight and die in her name.
The Haruhi and Sasaki Heresies
Admiral Suzumiya's ascension to godhood did not sit well with either the Terran Empire or the Metalkönige.
An Imperial Admiral by the name of Sasaki covertly observed Admiral Suzumiya's conquest of Haruhiist space, taking note of the lack of bloodshed and planet-killing. Ever the eternal schemer, Admiral Sasaki convinced the Inquest that Admiral Suzumiya had betrayed the Empire and was now conspiring with the Haruhiists and the Integrated Data Entity to overthrow it. While it was an open secret that Sasaki hated Suzumiya's guts, her snitching was partially motivated by a need to divert attention from her own secret betrayal. She had been covertly dealing with the Integrated Data Entity's own nemesis, the Canopy Domain, in her own efforts to seize control of the Empire; incidentally, Admiral Suzumiya was the only one who knew of this collaboration. Admiral Sasaki hoped that the Inquest would be too occupied with hunting down and silencing Admiral Suzumiya to pay any heed to her own conspiracy.
On the barbarian side of things, the Metalkönige were obviously not pleased with their wayward bretheren pledging their loyalty to an Imperial Admiral masquerading as their goddess. Collaborating with the Imperials is among the gravest forms of treason a Könige could ever dare to commit against his/her people; the Haruhiists were now traitors twice over, and to the orthodox Könige, this was more than enough justification to go to war.
Admiral Suzumiya had just solidified her control over the Haruhiists when she found herself under attack from the Empire that had forsaken her and from the barbarians that had exiled her subjects. When the Empire and the Metalkönige each found out about the other's involvement in this fiasco, what would have been a straightforward offensive to crush the Haruhiists rapidly snowballed into pure chaos. The Metalkönige were tempted to strike at unguarded or lightly defended Imperial territories while the bulk of the Imperial Navy was off trying to destroy their renegade admiral; conversely, the Imperial Navy tried to seize on the opportunity to crush both the Könige and Admiral Suzumiya in one fell swoop. Admiral Suzumiya put up as best a defense as she could against her aggressors, turning her strategic knowledge against the navy that it once helped; even though she was vastly outnumbered and outgunned at every turn, she gave as much damage to her foes as she took from them.
Meanwhile, with the Empire's attention focused on crushing Haruhi and the Könige into dust, Admiral Sasaki saw it fit to put her plan into motion. Taking a few pages from the Horus Heresy, she virus-bombed the Haruhiist world of Harvest V, wiping out 8 billion Haruhiists, civilians, and Imperial Marines in one swift stroke; thirty-five loyalist Marines managed to escape Harvest V aboard the commandeered frigate
Vengeful Spirit in an attempt to warn Imperial high command and the Inquest of Sasaki's double-cross. While the loyalists succeeded in getting through with their intel, the subsequent Imperial counter-strike at Admiral Sasaki's field HQ on Harvest III proved to be a disaster, owing to the fact that the reinforcements were actually part of Sasaki's forces.
As the Imperial contingent in Haruhiist space fractured due to paranoia over Admiral Sasaki's actions, the Haruhiists and the Metalkönige simultaneously struck back with a vengeance. While the Könige were concerned only with looting and pillaging, Admiral Suzumiya attempted to use the confusion to her advantage by trying to turn the Imperials to her cause; while the majority steadfastly believed the lies fed to the Inquest by Admiral Sasaki, a few bought Admiral Suzumiya's explanation that she was merely trying to bring the Haruhiists into the Imperial fold through peaceful means. Needless to say, it took plenty of convincing on Haruhi's part to undo the damage caused by Sasaki's fiction before she could proceed with her plans; once Admiral Suzumiya had regained their allegiance, the combined Haruhiist/Imperial force came down upon the Könige like the warhammers their own
Eisengrafen wielded, scattering whatever forces they had left in Haruhiist space.
The Siege of Fortress Terra
After the threat of the Metalkönige had been dealt with, the combined Haruhiist/Imperial force turned its attention to Admiral Sasaki and her traitor Fleets, who had been making their final preparations to assault Fortress Terra with the agents of the Canopy Domain. Yuki and Ryoko relayed the specifics of the situation to their superiors, who understood perfectly and deployed a battle fleet of their own to aid in the defense of Fortress Terra, though it was mainly out of their desire to crush the Canopy Domain rather than an obligation to safeguard the cradle of humanity.
After linking up with the Integrated Data Entity fleet at Alpha Centauri, Admiral Suzumiya made her move on Fortress Terra, arriving just in time to greet Admiral Sasaki, her traitor Fleets, and the Canopy Domain's own forces. What followed was Haruhi's greatest challenge yet as battle came down in the skies over Earth for the first time in ages; Sasaki was just as good a tactician and strategist as she was, and the Canopy Domain was obviously nothing to be trifled with.
The siege of Fortress Terra lasted exactly one week, during which Admiral Sasaki saw her forces get eaten away due to sheer attrition. Her attempts to land troops on Earth's surface were thwarted by Haruhiist and Integrated Data Entity raiders, and Canopy Domain soldiers and traitor Marines that managed to make it planetside were swiftly torn apart by a particularly tenacious ground defense spearheaded by none other than Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura themselves. In space, Haruhi and Integrated Data Entity fleet commander Emiri Kimidori used their superior firepower, numbers, and mobility to turn the traitor Fleets and the Canopy Domain ships into so much wreckage and debris. At the end of the week, only Sasaki's personal flagship, the
Wandering Shadow, and a few Canopy Domain ships remained.
The Endgame and Sasaki's Revelation
On the seventh day of the siege, Admiral Sasaki's executive officer Captain Kyouko Tachibana, former Inquest Agent Fujiwara (better known by his sobriquet of "Sneering Bastard"), and Canopy Domain adjutant Kuyou Suou informed their superior that Imperial loyalist reinforcements were en route to Terra and were due at their destination in less than 24 hours. At that moment, Sasaki realized that her gambit had failed horrendously. She did not factor in Haruhi's interference, nor did she anticipate the sheer tenacity of the loyalists; she could not carry out any further operations with the forces now at her disposal, and she was sure to be killed once the reinforcements arrived at last. It was at that point that Sasaki made the decision to drop the shields of the
Wandering Shadow, hoping to draw out Haruhi into a final, personal confrontation.
Admiral Sasaki's final gamble worked like a charm. After signing control of her fleets over to Emiri, Haruhi boarded the
Wandering Shadow, leading Yuki, Ryoko, and a battalion of Imperial Marines turned Haruhiists and Integrated Data Entity soldiers in their assault on the ship. After encountering fierce resistance all throughout, Haruhi finally met up with Sasaki on the bridge; she ordered Yuki, Ryoko, and the remaining Marines and Data Entities to return to the
Mystérique Sign, saying that things would become too messy to handle, even for them.
Once Haruhi's companions had fled, Admiral Sasaki treated her nemesis to a drawn-out, overly dramatic speech that she concluded with the revelation that she was none other than Haruhi Suzumiya's own evil twin sister (separated at birth, of course). While Haruhi was largely unaware of her own relation to Sasaki, Sasaki knew all too well of the existence of her twin sister, of her myriad exploits and accomplishments. Centuries of jealousy and resentment had bred an overpowering inferiority complex in Sasaki, which was a probable factor in her desire to destroy Haruhi and take control of the Empire. Now that she was face-to-face with Haruhi, Sasaki threw away her pretenses of interstellar conquest and replaced them with the single overriding urge to kill her sister.
This clash of immortals raged all throughout the bridge of the
Wandering Shadow for hours as Haruhi and Sasaki traded blows with one another, using whatever weapons they could get their hands upon; their martial skills and physical endurance were tremendous, and no quarter was asked or given. While details are sketchy over the exact proceedings, the duel ended with Haruhi slicing open Sasaki's chest, severing her right arm, and finally impaling her with a chainsword; in a final act of triumph and spite, Haruhi removed the chainsword, raised Sasaki's maimed body over her head, broke her back on her knee, tossed her aside, and impaled her once more with the chainsword for good measure. Haruhi obviously did not escape unscathed; she had suffered burns to approximately half of her face due to a plasma rifle blast from Sasaki during the duel, and she had also taken a bolter round directly to the chest. She left the
Wandering Shadow in the company of Yuki and Ryoko, who had chosen to stay behind despite their orders. The remnants of the Haruhiist/Integrated Data Entity fleet departed Fortress Terra only several minutes before the Imperial reinforcements arrived; the remnants of the Canopy Domain fleet dispersed shortly afterwards, leaving the
Wandering Shadow to drift in Earth orbit.
The Farewell of Haruhi Suzumiya
Before she left Earth for good, Haruhi left behind a brief message for the Imperials to read, which stated the following:
To whom it may concern,
It was never my intent to betray your Empire. I only wanted to bring the Haruhiist nation into your fold peacefully, but your Admiral Sasaki obviously had other plans. Thanks to her lies, while you were off chasing barbarians, Fortress Terra nearly fell to xeno mercenaries and Sasaki's traitor legions.
For one week, I fought to ensure Fortress Terra's integrity. It took your nearest forces one week to arrive. You, who branded me as a traitor for collaborating with xenos and barbarians, should, nay, must be grateful, for without me, your precious Empire would have ceased to exist.
Should you ever be in need of my services again, I'll be there to answer the call. For now, however, I've a nation to lead. I trust that the real traitors will be dealt with appropriately.
Love,
Haruhi
Haruhi had indeed won the day, but the victory she had won for the Empire ultimately proved to be Pyrrhic. The Haruhiists had suffered the heaviest losses in proportion to the other involved parties, with approximately 75-80% of their entire population lost to enemy action. The 14th and 49th Imperial Battle Fleets, which had remained under Haruhi's command since the start, had been all but decimated. The Integrated Data Entity fleet present at Terra lost one-fourth of their ships to enemy action.
The Haruhiists eventually resettled in another region of the Deadlands, far from Imperial or Metalkönige influence; under Haruhi's guidance and with the assistance of Yuki and Ryoko, they started to rebuild their civilization. Meanwhile, Haruhi began the long process of recuperating from her injuries.
The End...Or Was It?
On the other hand, Admiral Sasaki's traitors were decimated themselves; those few who had survived the final push towards Fortress Terra were promptly tried and executed by the Inquest for treason. The Canopy Domain had thrown its entire military strength behind the attempt to take Earth, and it suffered severely for its aggression, losing all of its ground troops and approximately 90% of its space fleet in one fell swoop.
When loyalist Imperial Marines finally boarded the
Wandering Shadow, they were astonished to find no trace of Admiral Sasaki or her minions. Unbeknownst to them, Admiral Sasaki was a bit too much like Kane in that she had somehow, inexplicably cheated death by surviving her duel with Haruhi; Sneering Bastard, Kuyou, and Captain Tachibana evacuated their superior from the
Wandering Shadow, took her to a waiting Canopy Domain ship, and promptly fled to Canopy Domain space.
The Present Day
Haruhi Suzumiya has long since recovered from the injuries dealt against her by Sasaki; in fact, some would say that she's stronger now than ever. With Yuki Nagato and Ryoko Asakura alongside her, Haruhi presides over the civilization that bears her name with a firm yet benevolent hand. She has done much to shape Haruhiist society as it is known today.
Former Admiral Sasaki, on the other hand, has not fared so well. Whereas Haruhi still looks much the same as she did in the 21st century, Sasaki's flawless face belies her severely mangled body; she is largely dependent on cybernetics to maintain her life. While the Haruhiists and the Data Integration Thought Entity have accepted Miss Suzumiya's leadership with unrivaled devotion, the Canopy Domain has not been as kind towards Sasaki; they still remember how she had led them to defeat long ago, and as such they are mostly distrustful towards her. Captain Tachibana and Sneering Bastard are still around, albeit encased within Canopy Domain-manufactured cybernetic prosthetic bodies; Kuyou, on the other hand, still has her original organic body.
The destruction of Earth and the subsequent disintegration of the Terran Empire has brought up new challenges for both Haruhi and Sasaki. Both are interested in conquest, but for different reasons; Haruhi wants to spread her gospel and reestablish the Empire under her own benevolent rule, while Sasaki wants to carve out her own corrupt niche in the galaxy one remnant at a time. There can only be one.
