Possibly the most helpful article you'll read today

[CaptHawkeye]

It was a better play than movie but basically the message was "selfish lifestyles and unreasonable goals are self destructive" but shhh he wouldn't want you to know that part.

EDIT: The movie actually ends with a bunch of the characters lives' ruined after they tried to fuck eachother over.

[Stark]

I'm not in HR anymore, but yeah this sort of 'make big change to your life' stuff is a major part of career change (especially for older people who may never have changed jobs). I can assure you that giving a 10-point plan to an out-of-work executive that is HAHAHA JUST GET A NEW JOB DUMBO is not productive. They know they need that; what they need are mental tools to allow them to go from where they are, to where they know they should be. But then, I was helping people change their lives and better themselves, and not just laughing at 'other people' so nerds would like me.

The movie has an message that makes his use of the speech extremely amusing; I imagine he simply feels safe nobody would have watched it.

[CaptHawkeye]

Articles like that are totally standard for Cracked though. I barely go there anymore because they love thinking cynicism = I'M A TOUGH GUY. The number of articles they write about telling people how pathetic they are for not being as "smart" as them finally just made me lose interest. You can't even chalk it up to sarcasm after a while.

[Terralthra]

Yeah, the whole point of Glengarry Glenn Ross, especially the play, was that attitudes like the one Alec Baldwin displays are ultimately destructive to people, and encourage them to do fucked up things to each other, either to succeed or to get revenge on people who succeeded at your expense.

[Zablorg]

i think i would be really good at writing silly fact-listing articles and i totally would do it

but i don't know any silly facts to spice up

Indeed my only immediately workable option (and I believe this is the reason you get these sorts of condescending articles so frequently) would be to write about my life experiences in some authoritative way

FIVE THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT DRAWING CARTOON PORN ON THE INTERNET GRRRR

[Stark]

'Write about life experiences in an authoritative way' is pretty much struggling 19th century author all the way.

You may need a silly hat and drug habit to compete.

[Zablorg]

disturbingly enough i own a newsboy cap

what if i said life was my drug

that would be a winning direction don't you think

[Stofsk]

Did you accidentally post something vacuous aimed at self-obsessed cowards or was that supposed to be 'helpful'?

He probably could have saved some time and effort by just saying, "You can't get by on good intentions, you actually have to do shit".

This was the message I got from the article as well, but I admit I felt vaguely uncomfortable when reading it. It took Hawks and Strak for me to see why.

[Spoonist]

If this article was correct then yelling at depressed people that they need to get up and do something would actually work.

[Luke Skywalker]

I don't know if everything the author says can be scientifically verified, but it certainly struck a chord with me, and convinced me to start working (and posting here... ).

PS. I don't see what the fuss is over the guy's ethics. He never advocates immoral or questionable behavior; on the contrary, he clearly extends his advice to charitable works as well. At no point does he deny that the fictional boss isn't sociopathic.

[Stark]

Well, someone who motivated a nerd to do someone useless is clearly beyond criticism.

You might want to think about the difference between a method that works sometimes, or infrequently, and methods that work consistently or more frequently. If you can judge anything beyond the most pathetic 'I like it/I don't like it' level - which I'm told can be difficult.

[Ziggy Stardust]

I stopped reading it at this point:

by virtue of your birth -- the moment you came into the world, you became part of a system designed purely to see to people's needs.

"Here's that shit you needed. Now fuck off."

It is such an idiotic and paranoid oversimplification that I didn't feel the need to hear more about what he has to say.

[Psawhn]

I stopped reading it at this point:

by virtue of your birth -- the moment you came into the world, you became part of a system designed purely to see to people's needs.

"Here's that shit you needed. Now fuck off."

It is such an idiotic and paranoid oversimplification that I didn't feel the need to hear more about what he has to say.

In Cracked style, the actual article has a bunch of photos with "pithy" captions. I think what happened is that Zod didn't delete the photo captions from the quote, so you get a bunch of non-sequiturs like that.