Explain yourself RAR

OT: anything goes!

Moderator: Edi

User avatar
K. A. Pital
Glamorous Commie
Posts: 20813
Joined: 2003-02-26 11:39am
Location: Elysium

Explain yourself RAR

Post by K. A. Pital »

You happen to have landed in a near-lawless area of the Third World by accident (got lost on the road because the plane you were flying on has made emergency landing on a highway and you had to make your way back relying on ground transport till you reach the capital.. Which you have failed to do).

Unfriendly locals capture you as a trespasser and find out you come from a First World country where your wage is $20 per hour. You are super-rich by their standards (average wage of $1,5 per day in this Third World country) and also happen work for a large company that is known for severe violations in the region that range from death squads sent after union leaders to creating a scarcity of water. Moreover, they have discovered that your country took part in bombing their region several decades ago. Bad luck!

Their ideas about what to do to you range from lynching you on the spot to holding you for ransom. They demand you answer for the crimes of your nation in some way. They are not fanatical and don't need a public execution a-la ISIS, but don't care much about your life either.

How would you explain yourself? Your goal is to stay alive. Could you trick the locals into forgiving you and what arguments would you use?

Discuss.
Lì ci sono chiese, macerie, moschee e questure, lì frontiere, prezzi inaccessibile e freddure
Lì paludi, minacce, cecchini coi fucili, documenti, file notturne e clandestini
Qui incontri, lotte, passi sincronizzati, colori, capannelli non autorizzati,
Uccelli migratori, reti, informazioni, piazze di Tutti i like pazze di passioni...

...La tranquillità è importante ma la libertà è tutto!
Assalti Frontali
User avatar
General Zod
Never Shuts Up
Posts: 29205
Joined: 2003-11-18 03:08pm
Location: The Clearance Rack
Contact:

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by General Zod »

Well if you guys want to ransom me go ahead, but I'm just a cog in the machine so good luck. But if you're going to execute me anyway can I pick my form of death?
"It's you Americans. There's something about nipples you hate. If this were Germany, we'd be romping around naked on the stage here."
User avatar
Zeropoint
Jedi Knight
Posts: 581
Joined: 2013-09-14 01:49am

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Zeropoint »

Ransom? Look, the company does not care about me as a person. They can replace me a lot cheaper than they could ransom me. They will literally let me die here. If you want me to record some statements denouncing the US and the company for the bombing, I'd be happy to do that for you, but that's about all I've got.

If you're going to kill me, please make it quick and clean.
I'm a cis-het white male, and I oppose racism, sexism, homophobia, and transphobia. I support treating all humans equally.

When fascism came to America, it was wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.

That which will not bend must break and that which can be destroyed by truth should never be spared its demise.
User avatar
aerius
Charismatic Cult Leader
Posts: 14780
Joined: 2002-08-18 07:27pm

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by aerius »

I guess it's time for some quality story telling. First I explain to them that the 1st world is not what they think it is, and that as a worker I have a lot more in common with the locals than my own people. For example, my company that's polluting and operating death squads in your nation? It's not like I willingly work for them, no, they do the same thing in my own country and they're actually holding my family hostage. If I don't work for them, they'll send death squads after my family and kill them just like they kill you guys, and then they'll kill me last. And our 1st world government is the same as yours, we didn't elects those assholes, they were fully bought & paid for by the corporations that are trying to kill us all, our votes mean nothing.

My goal would be to get some sympathy from the locals and convince them that I have nothing to do with all the shit that's going on in their country. After that I'll try to convince them to let me disappear into another country that they don't have issues with, and from there I walk into an embassy and make my way back home.
Image
aerius: I'll vote for you if you sleep with me. :)
Lusankya: Deal!
Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either. :P
User avatar
Raw Shark
Stunt Driver / Babysitter
Posts: 7476
Joined: 2005-11-24 09:35am
Location: One Mile Up

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Raw Shark »

How am I being restrained? Any guards? I've freed myself from being hung from a tree by my ankles and from being hog-tied to a chair once each...

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
User avatar
muse
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 1792
Joined: 2003-11-26 07:04pm

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by muse »

Raw Shark wrote:How am I being restrained?
You are tied to a bed
Any guards?
And the guard says you have a real purty mouth...
ø¤ º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum viditur.
(Whatever is said in Latin sounds profound.)

I like Celine Dion myself. Her ballads alone....they make me go all teary-eyed and shit.
- Havok
User avatar
Raw Shark
Stunt Driver / Babysitter
Posts: 7476
Joined: 2005-11-24 09:35am
Location: One Mile Up

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Raw Shark »

muse wrote:And the guard says you have a real purty mouth...
Negotiation path seems clear, then. :D

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
User avatar
U.P. Cinnabar
Sith Marauder
Posts: 3845
Joined: 2016-02-05 08:11pm
Location: Aboard the RCS Princess Cecile

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by U.P. Cinnabar »

K. A. Pital wrote:You happen to have landed in a near-lawless area of the Third World by accident (got lost on the road because the plane you were flying on has made emergency landing on a highway and you had to make your way back relying on ground transport till you reach the capital.. Which you have failed to do).

Unfriendly locals capture you as a trespasser and find out you come from a First World country where your wage is $20 per hour. You are super-rich by their standards (average wage of $1,5 per day in this Third World country) and also happen work for a large company that is known for severe violations in the region that range from death squads sent after union leaders to creating a scarcity of water. Moreover, they have discovered that your country took part in bombing their region several decades ago. Bad luck!

Their ideas about what to do to you range from lynching you on the spot to holding you for ransom. They demand you answer for the crimes of your nation in some way. They are not fanatical and don't need a public execution a-la ISIS, but don't care much about your life either.

How would you explain yourself? Your goal is to stay alive. Could you trick the locals into forgiving you and what arguments would you use?

Discuss.
Try to explain to them that $20 an hour back home is starvation wages(though I doubt I'll make headway there), that the company treats me only slightly less shit than they do them, and, since I feel guilty over what the people I work for have done, I offer to help these guys out against these bastards, who I never liked working for anyway, in exchange for, at least, delaying the hour of my horrible demise until after they've won.

What little inside knowledge I have is sure to be worth more to them than some paltry ransom, assuming the company even bothers to pony up.
"Beware the Beast, Man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone amongst God's primates, he kills for sport, for lust, for greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him, drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of Death.."
—29th Scroll, 6th Verse of Ape Law
"Indelible in the hippocampus is the laughter. The uproarious laughter between the two, and their having fun at my expense.”
---Doctor Christine Blasey-Ford
User avatar
FaxModem1
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 7700
Joined: 2002-10-30 06:40pm
Location: In a dark reflection of a better world

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by FaxModem1 »

Bide my time until Sylvester Stallone breaks through the wall with a machine gun, liberating the country.

Seriously though, try to explain that I work for a non-profit, and that making 20 bucks an hour would be wonderful, as I don't even make that, and the concept of Cost of Living. Since I'm sure the prices in this country are much cheaper than mine for something like a loaf of bread.

Also ask them how I afforded an international flight on my meager salary, as it's a mystery to me, especially since I'm on a very tight budget and can't throw money around like that.
Image
User avatar
Alferd Packer
Sith Marauder
Posts: 3699
Joined: 2002-07-19 09:22pm
Location: Slumgullion Pass
Contact:

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Alferd Packer »

Convert to the local religion.

No, seriously. Since it's a Third World country, I don't speak the language, so I'll be doing my communicating through an interpreter. Moreover, the only people who are apt to speak my language in this lawless region are probably educated clergy, since other educated professionals, politicians, diplomats, etc. are most likely found far away in the capital or large cities. And since they are in this lawless region, they are probably the sort of hard-line, fundamentalist, evangelizing clergy who don't take especially kindly to heathens.

So, I'll cease being a heathen. The angry locals are going to be more leery about killing a co-religionist, especially one who's just seen the light and repented for his sins of being from an aggressive, godless, imperialist nation. Hell, maybe I'll even be afforded some kind of protection by the clergy, who might want to use me as propaganda. Still, it beats dying.
"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance--that principle is contempt prior to investigation." -Herbert Spencer

"Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain." - Schiller, Die Jungfrau von Orleans, III vi.
User avatar
Zixinus
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 6663
Joined: 2007-06-19 12:48pm
Location: In Seth the Blitzspear
Contact:

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Zixinus »

First, I would be severely surprised that Hungary was actually involved in stuff like this and assure them that we are just small bitches to much bigger dogs: which isn't completely false several decades back as Hungary was too neatly positioned in the Soviet zone of things by the end of WW2. I'd enbiggen how we were exploited and sort of draw the events of 1956 all over into everyday life. That's kind of how to go for. Take everyday truths (I can't just build a house, I have to pay just to have the right to the house and frame it as a bribe), stuff my own people do and tell those.

Second, how am I supposed to explain myself? I don't expect rural people from a third world country to have great access to English or even know where Hungary is.

Third, try to tell that I have a family too. I do have a niece. Draw on real common things like family. Their companies took the only good water supply from them? What a coincidence, they do the exact same thing back home and they own our sorry asses to boot, we work for them or were informed that they can do [thing that happened to them]. They are operating on emotional logic and rumors. If someone is evil to them, they'll believe that those will be evil to others too.

The issue is though that ultimately, I am screwed no matter what I do. I am not very charismatic to begin with, if these people want to have revenge on somebody for all their grievances laid upon them for decades of misfortune, they'll do it. If they are hesitating and my most earnest pleas for compassion or mercy are ignored, there wasn't much to do in the first place. Sucks to be me. I should have stayed with a group from the plane.
Credo!
Chat with me on Skype if you want to talk about writing, ideas or if you want a test-reader! PM for address.
User avatar
U.P. Cinnabar
Sith Marauder
Posts: 3845
Joined: 2016-02-05 08:11pm
Location: Aboard the RCS Princess Cecile

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by U.P. Cinnabar »

I'm assuming K.A. Pital's included some disaffected local kids who went off to join someone's military/to university/to work for the company doing the exploiting and came home radicalized, for lack of a better term amongst the denizens of this lawless area, and some of them became authority figures in this particular lawless area(one-eyed man in the country of the blind and all that).
"Beware the Beast, Man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone amongst God's primates, he kills for sport, for lust, for greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him, drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of Death.."
—29th Scroll, 6th Verse of Ape Law
"Indelible in the hippocampus is the laughter. The uproarious laughter between the two, and their having fun at my expense.”
---Doctor Christine Blasey-Ford
bilateralrope
Sith Acolyte
Posts: 5955
Joined: 2005-06-25 06:50pm
Location: New Zealand

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by bilateralrope »

The business I work for doesn't exist outside of the city where I live, let alone outside the country. But I could see another business in another country that does similar work deciding to use the same name, even without knowing of the company I work for.

So my first step is to try and clear up that confusion.
User avatar
K. A. Pital
Glamorous Commie
Posts: 20813
Joined: 2003-02-26 11:39am
Location: Elysium

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by K. A. Pital »

Sudden option.

Q appears and says that he can kill all the Third Worlders. He gives you the choice: have him kill them or have him leave you at their mercy.

Your call?
Lì ci sono chiese, macerie, moschee e questure, lì frontiere, prezzi inaccessibile e freddure
Lì paludi, minacce, cecchini coi fucili, documenti, file notturne e clandestini
Qui incontri, lotte, passi sincronizzati, colori, capannelli non autorizzati,
Uccelli migratori, reti, informazioni, piazze di Tutti i like pazze di passioni...

...La tranquillità è importante ma la libertà è tutto!
Assalti Frontali
User avatar
Flagg
CUNTS FOR EYES!
Posts: 12797
Joined: 2005-06-09 09:56pm
Location: Hell. In The Room Right Next to Reagan. He's Fucking Bonzo. No, wait... Bonzo's fucking HIM.

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Flagg »

I'll gladly provide my services as a misshapen disabled CHUD to entertain your children!
We pissing our pants yet?
-Negan

You got your shittin' pants on? Because you’re about to
Shit. Your. Pants!
-Negan

He who can,
does; he who cannot, teaches.
-George Bernard Shaw
User avatar
Flagg
CUNTS FOR EYES!
Posts: 12797
Joined: 2005-06-09 09:56pm
Location: Hell. In The Room Right Next to Reagan. He's Fucking Bonzo. No, wait... Bonzo's fucking HIM.

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Flagg »

K. A. Pital wrote:Sudden option.

Q appears and says that he can kill all the Third Worlders. He gives you the choice: have him kill them or have him leave you at their mercy.

Your call?
[racism]Kill them, they're all going to die horrible diarrhea deaths by 30 anyway![/racism]

Probably have to stay, I'll likely be put out of my misery by a drone strike eventually.
We pissing our pants yet?
-Negan

You got your shittin' pants on? Because you’re about to
Shit. Your. Pants!
-Negan

He who can,
does; he who cannot, teaches.
-George Bernard Shaw
User avatar
U.P. Cinnabar
Sith Marauder
Posts: 3845
Joined: 2016-02-05 08:11pm
Location: Aboard the RCS Princess Cecile

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by U.P. Cinnabar »

K. A. Pital wrote:Sudden option.

Q appears and says that he can kill all the Third Worlders. He gives you the choice: have him kill them or have him leave you at their mercy.

Your call?
The latter. There's a chance I can get myself out of this, if only for a little while. There's no chance to undo the mass murder of a group of people, many of whom were guilty only of having been born in pestilent shitholes.
"Beware the Beast, Man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone amongst God's primates, he kills for sport, for lust, for greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him, drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of Death.."
—29th Scroll, 6th Verse of Ape Law
"Indelible in the hippocampus is the laughter. The uproarious laughter between the two, and their having fun at my expense.”
---Doctor Christine Blasey-Ford
User avatar
Zixinus
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 6663
Joined: 2007-06-19 12:48pm
Location: In Seth the Blitzspear
Contact:

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Zixinus »

U.P. Cinnabar wrote:
K. A. Pital wrote:Sudden option.

Q appears and says that he can kill all the Third Worlders. He gives you the choice: have him kill them or have him leave you at their mercy.

Your call?
The latter. There's a chance I can get myself out of this, if only for a little while. There's no chance to undo the mass murder of a group of people, many of whom were guilty only of having been born in pestilent shitholes.
Pretty much this.

Or make promises to Q to do whatever he wants with me, possibly putting me in more ridiculous RARs, but don't kill people on my account.
Credo!
Chat with me on Skype if you want to talk about writing, ideas or if you want a test-reader! PM for address.
User avatar
FaxModem1
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 7700
Joined: 2002-10-30 06:40pm
Location: In a dark reflection of a better world

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by FaxModem1 »

K. A. Pital wrote:Sudden option.

Q appears and says that he can kill all the Third Worlders. He gives you the choice: have him kill them or have him leave you at their mercy.

Your call?
No thanks, Q. 1 life for about 20 isn't a bad trade, even if they're being moronic people looking for a scapegoat for their problems and not actual help.
Image
User avatar
aerius
Charismatic Cult Leader
Posts: 14780
Joined: 2002-08-18 07:27pm

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by aerius »

I take the offer and justify it as an act of god. It was god's will, if they didn't take me hostage and make Q appear they'd all still be alive, it was god punishing them for their sins.
Image
aerius: I'll vote for you if you sleep with me. :)
Lusankya: Deal!
Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either. :P
User avatar
FaxModem1
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 7700
Joined: 2002-10-30 06:40pm
Location: In a dark reflection of a better world

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by FaxModem1 »

aerius wrote:I take the offer and justify it as an act of god. It was god's will, if they didn't take me hostage and make Q appear they'd all still be alive, it was god punishing them for their sins.
Q might be lying, and as soon as you agree, he disappears, leaving you with an angry mob who knows that you'd kill them all to survive.
Image
User avatar
salm
Rabid Monkey
Posts: 10296
Joined: 2002-09-09 08:25pm

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by salm »

Alferd Packer wrote:Convert to the local religion.

No, seriously. Since it's a Third World country, I don't speak the language, so I'll be doing my communicating through an interpreter. Moreover, the only people who are apt to speak my language in this lawless region are probably educated clergy, since other educated professionals, politicians, diplomats, etc. are most likely found far away in the capital or large cities. And since they are in this lawless region, they are probably the sort of hard-line, fundamentalist, evangelizing clergy who don't take especially kindly to heathens.
.
Thanks to the Britsish empire there are plenty of third world nations where English is spoken by a very large number of people or where English is even an official language.
User avatar
TithonusSyndrome
Sith Devotee
Posts: 2569
Joined: 2006-10-10 08:15pm
Location: The Money Store

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by TithonusSyndrome »

Show them my First Nations ID card and establish that I have more in common with them than they might first think.
Image
User avatar
U.P. Cinnabar
Sith Marauder
Posts: 3845
Joined: 2016-02-05 08:11pm
Location: Aboard the RCS Princess Cecile

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by U.P. Cinnabar »

FaxModem1 wrote:
aerius wrote:I take the offer and justify it as an act of god. It was god's will, if they didn't take me hostage and make Q appear they'd all still be alive, it was god punishing them for their sins.
Q might be lying, and as soon as you agree, he disappears, leaving you with an angry mob who knows that you'd kill them all to survive.
Because, yes, Q's like that. He truly is.
"Beware the Beast, Man, for he is the Devil's pawn. Alone amongst God's primates, he kills for sport, for lust, for greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his brother's land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a desert of his home and yours. Shun him, drive him back into his jungle lair, for he is the harbinger of Death.."
—29th Scroll, 6th Verse of Ape Law
"Indelible in the hippocampus is the laughter. The uproarious laughter between the two, and their having fun at my expense.”
---Doctor Christine Blasey-Ford
User avatar
Alyrium Denryle
Minister of Sin
Posts: 22224
Joined: 2002-07-11 08:34pm
Location: The Deep Desert
Contact:

Re: Explain yourself RAR

Post by Alyrium Denryle »

Q scenario... yeah. Go ahead and leave me at their mercy Q. I am not going to consent to you killing them. Side benefit, they might see me decline to kill them and return the favor.

The basic scenario is implausible for me. For me to make any kind of counter-argument I would have to know my own job and company involved. I worked as a grocery store chain as a teenager, and universities since then. Not much chance of oppression. Future employment... I dont know, but there are only a few options.

Universities again. "Wait, when did the University of Michigan oppress you?".
The US government, but at least that makes sense. Though in terms of oppression the agency does not. The USDA and CDC are my most likely employers. The USDA does not get up to anything in the developing world other than trying to figure out better ways to deal with crop infestations and increasing agricultural yield through better management. The CDC fights the things most likely to kill the children in the developing world. The DoD might hire me, but when they bring in the entomologists it is typically to inspect food supply chains, or deal with tropical diseases during troop deployments or as part of humanitarian missions.

There literally is no one that someone in my specialty could reasonably be working for that does terrible terrible things. I am an entomologist for fuck's sake. The closest you get is Monsanto and other agribusiness companies, and they have not done anything even close to death squads.

"So yes. My government has done terrible terrible things to you, even recently. On the other hand, I work for one of the agencies in that government that eliminated smallpox, and is working on eliminating <list of local horrifying diseases> and/or creating the crops that will allow your kids to not starve to death anymore. In fact, not only do I work for that agency, that is the sort of work I do. I live on 20 dollars an hour (20 dollars per hour is a small sum for someone of my specialty and education) because I donate 15-30 of the 35-50 dollars an hour I actually make (where in the spread I fall will depend on eventual pay grade) to medicins sans frontiers, and various other NGOs that provide medical assistance in the developing world (this is something I do plan to do once debts are paid off). That 20 dollars an hour might be freakishly wealthy to you, but at american costs of living, I am getting by in the city in which I have been stationed. I am not considered a particularly wealthy person in the US on what I actually live on because that amount of money does not go very far. You would be much better off lynching one of your local kleptocrats if you want some sort of class-struggle revenge. I might even help.

If you want to ransom me, that is cool, but dont expect anyone to pay. No one in the US who values me enough to pay that kind of money has that much. If the US government finds out you have me, they wont pay for me. They will probably just send in marines--if they do anything. Or you can kill me, I suppose. Certainly my country has done enough to you over the years that your anger is justified, though I would rather it not be me you kill. You might feel better for a little while, but you wont actually benefit from it. Or, you can let me go. If you let me go, I know all the disease causing insects in this area, and how to reduce their ability to cause you harm. I am happy to help you if you let me."
GALE Force Biological Agent/
BOTM/Great Dolphin Conspiracy/
Entomology and Evolutionary Biology Subdirector:SD.net Dept. of Biological Sciences


There is Grandeur in the View of Life; it fills me with a Deep Wonder, and Intense Cynicism.

Factio republicanum delenda est
Post Reply