Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

OT: anything goes!

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salm
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by salm »

Broomstick wrote:
Tsyroc wrote: As far as anything even remotely medically related, even the basic over the counter stuff, it is probably illegal for her to give an opinion or recommendation.
^ This.

It would be practicing medicine without a license and opens up both my employer and myself to all sorts of liability.
Do you expect the average customer to know that? It doesn´t seem very surprising to me that somebody would ask a salesperson about a specific product.
I mean, do they demand information even after you tell them that there are legal issues? That would be annoying but a customer asking a salesperson for help seems rather... normal.

As for the hair dye. Is it illegal for that kind of stuff as well or is it only illegal for drugs?
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Broomstick »

salm wrote:
Broomstick wrote:
Tsyroc wrote: As far as anything even remotely medically related, even the basic over the counter stuff, it is probably illegal for her to give an opinion or recommendation.
^ This.

It would be practicing medicine without a license and opens up both my employer and myself to all sorts of liability.
Do you expect the average customer to know that? It doesn´t seem very surprising to me that somebody would ask a salesperson about a specific product.
I mean, do they demand information even after you tell them that there are legal issues? That would be annoying but a customer asking a salesperson for help seems rather... normal.
There's asking for help and then there is asking for medical advice.

If you come in, point a rash on your arm and say "the doctor told me it's poison ivy, what should I put on it?" I can direct you to the remedies specifically intended for poison ivy. If, however, you simply point to a rash and say "can you tell me what caused this?" no, I can't. I can still steer them towards various rash medicines, but I can't say "that's poison ivy" or "that's caused by your laundry soap". If they have a rash in their armpit I can mention that some people are sensitive to aluminum in antiperspirants and if they want to they can try a deodorant that doesn't contain aluminum, but I can't definitively say "that's caused by aluminum". If you want an unscented hand lotion, or a shampoo containing a particular ingredient, I can help you find it. I can help you find what you're already looking for, or help you find what your range of choices are, but I can't tell you to buy X for Y condition.

Yes, some people remain demanding even after I say there are restrictions on how much advice I can give. I think in one instance there was a problem with a new-to-the-US gentleman from a country where the rules are different. In other cases, you have people with a deep and almost psychotic distrust of doctors. Some people are just crazy (we had one lady who was pestering the produce staff - she wanted assurance that the root vegetables she was buying had never been exposed to dirt. You know, the stuff plants grow in? Not sure if that was crazy, ignorant, or both.)

However, MOST people who come in seem to understand I'm not a doctor and if I say "I'm not qualified to give that sort of advice" usually go "oh, right - should I ask the pharmacist?" or "yes, I should ask the doctor that."

There is a subset of people who come in after their doctor has told them to get something VERY specific and it turns out we don't have exactly that - which is when I call in the pharmacist because those folks have the training to know when you can make substitutions and when you can't. Or, in the case where the folks had a premature baby the pharmacist could discuss how they could properly dilute a remedy for a normal, full-term infant.
As for the hair dye. Is it illegal for that kind of stuff as well or is it only illegal for drugs?
Nope, but the way some women are about their hair it's a emotional/social minefield. I usually tell them I have no experience with dying my hair so I don't feel I can advise them much on the subject. Oddly enough, that seems better received than "I'm not a doctor so I can't diagnose your [whatever]".

The other thing about hair stuff is race, gender, and ethnicity issues. I've had women who came in asking for Mane N' Tail shampoo who get upset because it's in the "ethnic hair aisle" meaning it's in the stuff marketed to black women. Sorry, that's where it is. Honestly, though, the shampoo does not know or care about your ancestry or skin color. That's also where the "fade cream" is. Some 80 year old white biddy comes in asking for something to even out her skin tone and age spots other than cosmetics to cover it and pitches a fit because it's next to the Afro-Sheen. Some don't care. I've recently had an elderly white man come in asking for a specific olive-oil based hair and scalp treatment (for what's left of his) which is normally marketed to black women. He didn't care about that, bought it, and left happy. I had a white guy come in with the problem of in-grown beard stubble, had suffered from it all his adult life. There is stuff for that (basically, a facial depilatory) but it's in the "black people section" (black men are more prone to the problem). Again, he didn't care. You have other men who wouldn't be caught dead using "girl's stuff" although I suspect some of the stuff they buy for their "wife/girlfriend" is really for them.

Honestly, it's usually not an issue whether a man or woman uses and item regardless of what's on the box... but there are exceptions:

- Minoxidil formulations for hair loss are different for men and women

- Grecian formula hair coloring contains a lead compound and should not be used by women of childbearing age. Actually, I'm not convinced it's really OK for men, but it's been in use so long and no one has dropped dead it's been grandfathered in. I haven't found any other men's hair dye with that ingredient, but it's possible, so women should probably avoid men's hair dyes, though men can used women's hair dyes (which aren't proven 100% safe, either, to be honest)

- Facial depilatories are different for men and women. Women have finer hair and thinner skin, men have that thick beard hair and thicker skin so they need and can tolerate a stronger formulation than a woman can. Men would most likely find women's depilatories ineffective, and women would find men's to be irritating or even painful.

And finally, since we're on the topic of skin and color, in the US you can't get hydroquinone in concentrations greater than 2% over the counter. That's a skin bleach, and it has legitimate uses in moderating skin color that, for whatever reason, decides to be darker than the rest of your hide (pregnancy hormones are one of the more common causes), or reducing the appearance of age spots, and so forth. There are issues surrounding it's use, from possible long-term side effects to social and ethnic disputes. Regardless, if you want something stronger you have to see a dermatologist and convince him/her to write you a prescription for it. For some immigrants, much stronger versions were available back home and they are not always happy about the US rules.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Tsyroc »

salm wrote:
Broomstick wrote:
Tsyroc wrote: As far as anything even remotely medically related, even the basic over the counter stuff, it is probably illegal for her to give an opinion or recommendation.
^ This.

It would be practicing medicine without a license and opens up both my employer and myself to all sorts of liability.
Do you expect the average customer to know that? It doesn´t seem very surprising to me that somebody would ask a salesperson about a specific product.
I mean, do they demand information even after you tell them that there are legal issues? That would be annoying but a customer asking a salesperson for help seems rather... normal.

As for the hair dye. Is it illegal for that kind of stuff as well or is it only illegal for drugs?
Heck, nurses I work with don't know that it is illegal for me to answer their drug questions. Either that or they hope they can sneak one by me and save themselves a call to the pharmacy. :) I just tell them that I can't say one way or another and that they need to speak to the pharmacist.

I would assume that hair dye is fair game but then we don't carry it where I work. ;-)
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Tsyroc »

Broomstick wrote: - Grecian formula hair coloring contains a lead compound and should not be used by women of childbearing age. Actually, I'm not convinced it's really OK for men, but it's been in use so long and no one has dropped dead it's been grandfathered in. I haven't found any other men's hair dye with that ingredient, but it's possible, so women should probably avoid men's hair dyes, though men can used women's hair dyes (which aren't proven 100% safe, either, to be honest)

- Facial depilatories are different for men and women. Women have finer hair and thinner skin, men have that thick beard hair and thicker skin so they need and can tolerate a stronger formulation than a woman can. Men would most likely find women's depilatories ineffective, and women would find men's to be irritating or even painful.
The FDA has been reevaluating items that have been grandfathered in. Because of this a long time medication for earaches is no longer manufactured. Auralgan (antipyrine benzocaine). We've used that multiple times a day for the years I've worked in this hospital but now it is no longer okay. I would not be surprised if some time in the future that Grecian formula is either reformulated or pulled from the market. I'm also kind of wondering about Listerine, but maybe it is only the old school golden looking stuff that was grandfathered in.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Broomstick »

I know that lead acetate, the item in Grecian formula, is banned in Europe and Canada for all hair dye and cosmetics. Although US testing showed that use in hair dyes according to directions did not result in lead entering the blood stream of test subjects the problem is "used correctly" has to apply every single time, and it's relatively easy to self-contaminate if you're careless about getting it on your hands, not to mention issues with children in the household potentially getting ahold of it. There are are fixatives for dye available (that's what the lead acetate does, fixes the dye in the hair shaft) and no reason to continue to introduce lead into our living environment in such a manner. I'm not in the panic school of hazardous substances, I don't think you need a hazmat suit for every incidence of lead, but there's no good reason not to minimize exposure when it's easy to do so.
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.

Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.

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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Chardok »

Wonder if email conversations will translate

Me: I'm sending you a list of off-the-phone scheduled activity, in case you want to cancel some stuff so we meet Service level.
Ops manager: Great. This is by team, right?
Me: Yep. Done.
Ops manager: Thank you! Can you send me detail of the who?
Me: The Who are an English rock band that formed in 1964. Their classic line-up consisted of lead singer Roger Daltrey, guitarist Pete Townshend, bassist John Entwistle, and drummer Keith Moon. They are considered one of the most influential rock bands of the 20th century, selling over 100 million records worldwide and establishing their reputation equally on live shows and studio work.
Ops Manager: You're fired. ;)
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

CAR WASH BEGGAR: Dry it off for a dollar?

YOUR DRIVER: Consider that I am currently cleaning up vomit.

CAR WASH BEGGAR: C'mon, man, I'm just trying to get something to eat!

YOUR DRIVER: You are wearing a motherfucking Deadpool t-shirt. That shit wasn't even on sale until the trailer came out like two months ago. Look at what I'm wearing! You see the holes in my clothes? I should be asking you for money!

CAR WASH BEGGAR: [walking away] A'ight, then.

YOUR DRIVER: "A'ight, then." You want to be a professional actor, pretending to be something you're not for a living? You need to dress the part!

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

LACROSSE PLAYER: I just got out of my first twelve hour practice. I was NOT ready for that shit.

YOUR DRIVER: Damn.

LACROSSE PLAYER: Can we please go to like a Burger King or something? Anything that's on the way. I'm literally dying here.

YOUR DRIVER: Uh, I don't normally allow food in the cab...

LACROSSE PLAYER: C'mon, I'm begging you here! I'll double your tip. I didn't bring anything except a Gatorade and a Power Bar.

YOUR DRIVER: [subtly slips into TV ad voice] Wouldn't you rather go to J-Roo's? They're open all night, and you can sit down and get the meat combo platter. It's like four different kinds of real meat, including salty gyros, about a quarter pound each, for like fourteen bucks, and you can walk three blocks home afterward instead of paying for the cab to wait.

LACROSSE PLAYER: Mmn, that does sound really good right now...

YOUR DRIVER: And they've got those sticky buns, with the honey and pistachios...

LACROSSE PLAYER: Yeah, let's go there!

YOUR DRIVER: My pleasure!

LACROSSE PLAYER: I don't feel so bad, because nobody brought more food than I did, except fucking [name]. We're all standing there with Gatorades and Power Bars, and this kid rolls in with a whole loaf of bread, a wedge of Manchego cheese, a gallon of water, and one of those rotisserie chickens from Safeway.

YOUR DRIVER: That man is a genius.

LACROSSE PLAYER: That's what I said!
Last edited by Raw Shark on 2015-10-02 03:00pm, edited 4 times in total.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Zaune »

Huh. Safeway are still a thing over there? I thought they got bought out.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

Nope, Safeway is still doing fine here, even the one in the shit neighborhood that is popularly referred to as the Unsafeway. They don't even seem worried by the arrival of Trader Joe's and Sprouts, unlike King Soopers, who have gone totally schizo, lowering prices and frantically remodeling at some locations, and ceasing to be 24/7 at some others (which really throws a wrench into my life, I must add), with some overlap.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

HELLO BOOBS: So, be honest: You pulled over for us instead of those other girls because I was bouncing up and down in a really low-cut dress, right?

YOUR DRIVER: Yeah, that's pretty much my Bat Signal.

HELLO BOOBS: I told you boobs would be faster than Uber! Double-Ds For The Win!

HER FRIEND: Yeah, yeah, you have great tits. Let's just go.

[time passes]

HER FRIEND: Listen, I can't hang out anymore; I have work tomorrow. Are you going to be okay if I leave you alone with this guy?

HELLO BOOBS: Uh, yeah. I'm a big girl.

HER FRIEND: [intense look] Do I have to worry about leaving her with you?

YOUR DRIVER: Who, me? I'm a prince on a white horse.

HER FRIEND: [eyes us both uneasily] I'm going to call to check up on you.

HELLO BOOBS: Great, thanks. Love you, bye!

[about three minutes pass]

YOUR DRIVER: So, where are you from?

HELLO BOOBS: [phone rings] Seriously? [picks up] Oh, my fucking God, he's raping me! I'm being raped as we speak! I didn't even finish packing the bowl before the raping! Why did you leave me alone with his rapey man-cock? [pause] Yes, actually, I do have to be sarcastic. Go to bed, already. Good night.

YOUR DRIVER: [laughing] She's just looking out for you.

HELLO BOOBS: No, it's more complicated than that. The last time I saw her she kissed me and told me she's in love with me. This is more stalky than protecty.

YOUR DRIVER: Well, shit. At least I know what I'm getting into, this time.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

MY FAVORITE STRIPPER: [answering the phone] Abortion Clinic! You rape 'em, we scrape 'em!

YOUR DRIVER: [laughing] Um, I'm out front.

MY FAVORITE STRIPPER: Thank fucking God. Get me the fuck out of here.

[time passes]

YOUR DRIVER: Rough night?

MY FAVORITE STRIPPER: Nothing but fucking Vikings fans! I'm sorry you came all this way to see your team get their asses kicked, but spend some money and have a good time already! My rent is due tomorrow! I even stole this guy's hat and wore it on stage, and they all just stare at me like I'm giving a lecture on the War of the Fucking Roses. I couldn't get a dance to save my life. I practically begged this one guy who I talked to for about an hour, like, "Listen, you're an accountant, right? If somebody came in your office knowing what it was and started asking you for tax advice without paying for it, you'd be totally pissed, right?" And Dickface tells me, "Duh, I'll rock, paper, scissors you for it. If you win, I'll buy a dance, but if I win it's free."

YOUR DRIVER: What a douche. You didn't actually do it, did you?

MY FAVORITE STRIPPER: [sigh] Yes. I told him best of three, and won the first two, and he still didn't do it! He just bought me a shot, which I didn't even want until right then, and can get for free. So the club made ten dollars. I drank it, looked him right in the eye, told him, "Fuck you, a bet is a bet," and walked away.

YOUR DRIVER: Fuck. So, we're drinking?

MY FAVORITE STRIPPER: You're damn straight we're drinking.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

YOUR DRIVER: No drinks in the cab! YOU, Sir. No drinks.

TWO-MINUTE TOMMY: This isn't a drink, it's a spit cup for my dip.

YOUR DRIVER: Okay, okay. Just don't spill it.

TWO-MINUTE TOMMY: I won't spill it! You see this ring? I played against Elway!

YOUR DRIVER: I don't give a fuck about that, just don't spill the dip juice.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Vain »

Raw Shark wrote:YOUR DRIVER: I don't give a fuck about that, just don't spill the dip juice.
Christ, you're a disappointment. I'm positive that the chance to bask in John Elway's distantly reflected glory is the whole reason this dude is in Denver in the first place. I assume this was a class ring? The Vikings never won shit.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

Vain wrote:
Raw Shark wrote:YOUR DRIVER: I don't give a fuck about that, just don't spill the dip juice.
Christ, you're a disappointment. I'm positive that the chance to bask in John Elway's distantly reflected glory is the whole reason this dude is in Denver in the first place. I assume this was a class ring? The Vikings never won shit.
He was so drunk, being mean would've been pointless. He's a college hall-of-famer (yes, my curiosity lead me to Wikipedia), but didn't accomplish shit other than that aside from being there for twenty years in the NFL. Probably why he gets drunk as a skunk now.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Vain »

Raw Shark wrote:He was so drunk, being mean would've been pointless. He's a college hall-of-famer (yes, my curiosity lead me to Wikipedia), but didn't accomplish shit other than that aside from being there for twenty years in the NFL. Probably why he gets drunk as a skunk now.
To be fair to Kramer, twenty years in the NFL, even as a journeyman, is nothing to sneeze at. Still, you are truly great beyond compare when a man with two decades in the league brags to strangers about merely having been on the same field as you.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

Seriously. I'm kind of sad to participate in this, but it can only be a credit to Elway. I joke that when you see a lost dog flyer here, there is a 50/50 chance that the name Elway appears.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Borgholio »

Abortion Clinic! You rape 'em, we scrape 'em!
You owe me a new keyboard.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

Borgholio wrote:You owe me a new keyboard.
I should probably do more posts where I just compile this girl's random one-liners. My all-time favorite abortion clinic joke was, "Bob's Abortions! No fetus can beat us!" :D

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Borgholio »

Oh she's definitely a keeper.
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

Got to get her before I can keep her. She doesn't want a boyfriend, she wants a geeky older brother with a minor drinking problem, and, lust on my end and genetics notwithstanding, she's pretty much accomplished that right now.

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by LadyTevar »

Raw Shark wrote:
Borgholio wrote:You owe me a new keyboard.
I should probably do more posts where I just compile this girl's random one-liners. My all-time favorite abortion clinic joke was, "Bob's Abortions! No fetus can beat us!" :D
Much better than the Funeral Home jokes we did. "You stab 'em, we slab 'em."
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Venator »

The hidden benefits of Bluetooth: less aggressive outlets for road rage!

*Getting tailgated, cut off and bullied by a work van along with several other cars.*
Me: *Voice-dials number on the truck*
Guy: "Hey, <Auto Glass Shop>."
Me: "Hey, could you do me a favour?"
Guy: "Sure?"
Me: "Tell whatever asshole you have driving your white van to stop trying to CAUSE auto glass damage? Thaaaanks!" *click*
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by SCRawl »

LadyTevar wrote:
Raw Shark wrote:
Borgholio wrote:You owe me a new keyboard.
I should probably do more posts where I just compile this girl's random one-liners. My all-time favorite abortion clinic joke was, "Bob's Abortions! No fetus can beat us!" :D
Much better than the Funeral Home jokes we did. "You stab 'em, we slab 'em."
How about "City Morgue. You kill 'em, we chill 'em." (That one I got from "Moonlighting", a show in the mid-1980s. It made Bruce Willis famous.)
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Re: Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

Post by Raw Shark »

YOUR DRIVER: Rough night?

CRYING LADY: Uh-huh!

YOUR DRIVER: Want to talk about it?

[time passes]

CRYING LADY: [ends long rant that can be summed up as her husband is a hyper-aggressive asshole when he drinks, and they had a fight, so I'm driving her to her Mom's house] I mean, really, how can this evening get any worse?

YOUR DRIVER: . . O (Here we go...)

[time passes]

CRYING LADY: [on the phone] WHAT!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE GOT STABBED!?

YOUR DRIVER: That escalated quickly...

"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
Locked