Just got the ultrasound results....

[Kodiak]

and it's a BOY! I had to come straight back to the office, so I'll post pictures later. Now all we need is a name for the little guy. Right now our top choices are going for a junior (Kodiak Jr.), Owen, or Malcolm. I'm open to suggestions.

[Terralthra]

Michael.

[tim31]

You brown nose.

I suggest Timothy.

[Count Chocula]

Given that you're now at post 666, might I suggest: Old Nick?

[Mr Bean]

and it's a BOY! I had to come straight back to the office, so I'll post pictures later. Now all we need is a name for the little guy. Right now our top choices are going for a junior (Kodiak Jr.), Owen, or Malcolm. I'm open to suggestions.

First off let me tell you, a Jr means your a dick. Three Jr's mean your entering the George Forman scale(Five+ kids all named George). I mean come on, can you think of a bigger dick move then naming your kid after yourself?

May I recommend naming the kid after ooh I don't know old Final Fantasy Villains or perhaps former Prime Ministers of Canada?
That's how you get a name you'll remember and will set you child on the path to success
Or you know, you can set him on the path to failure and call him something like Owen. Malcolm is only passable if you give him some sort of kick ass middle name.

[Kodiak]

and it's a BOY! I had to come straight back to the office, so I'll post pictures later. Now all we need is a name for the little guy. Right now our top choices are going for a junior (Kodiak Jr.), Owen, or Malcolm. I'm open to suggestions.

First off let me tell you, a Jr means your a dick. Three Jr's mean your entering the George Forman scale(Five+ kids all named George). I mean come on, can you think of a bigger dick move then naming your kid after yourself?

May I recommend naming the kid after ooh I don't know old Final Fantasy Villains or perhaps former Prime Ministers of Canada?
That's how you get a name you'll remember and will set you child on the path to success
Or you know, you can set him on the path to failure and call him something like Owen. Malcolm is only passable if you give him some sort of kick ass middle name.

My biggest obstacle is the wife. I want to give the boy a name like Cyrus or Maximilian or even Omicron, but then she comes back with names like Riley or Kale. It's a compromise, honestly, and I'll keep you all posted as this develops.

[Count Chocula]

My wife and I chose a standard name because "Megatron" didn't go with our last name. And she would have kicked my ass. Congrats, Kodiak.

[Lusankya]

and it's a BOY! I had to come straight back to the office, so I'll post pictures later. Now all we need is a name for the little guy. Right now our top choices are going for a junior (Kodiak Jr.), Owen, or Malcolm. I'm open to suggestions.

First off let me tell you, a Jr means your a dick. Three Jr's mean your entering the George Forman scale(Five+ kids all named George). I mean come on, can you think of a bigger dick move then naming your kid after yourself?

QFT. Jr is a dick move.

I recommend something like Zachariah. Or just plain Zachary. Or Alexander. Unacceptable names include: one-syllable names and names that start with a "J". Don't call him Cecil either, because that will just get him beaten up. Also, celtic names that are spelt completely differently from the way they sound are also poor form.

[CorSec]

Bob. Bob is a good, solid name.

[Terralthra]

You brown nose.

My name is Michael. I was self-aggrandizing, not brown-nosing.

[Coyote]

Lucifer. Or George Bush.

[Lonestar]

Benedict.

Benedict is a strong name.

[Mr Bean]

My biggest obstacle is the wife. I want to give the boy a name like Cyrus or Maximilian or even Omicron, but then she comes back with names like Riley or Kale. It's a compromise, honestly, and I'll keep you all posted as this develops.

Your missing her tatic, you come back with slightly off the wall names(Which will set your child on THE PATH TO GREATNESS!) and she comes back with lazy-mctop ten baby names list.

Which is why you need to build a list of crazy names and then end it off with a named filled with success but so resonable that she's jump on it.

List of Unreasonable names to good for your child.
Grigori, Lex, Viktor, Gaius, Saul, Conan and of course Mumm-Ra
Satisfied that your wife is now conviced you are insane right after the Mumm-Ra you hit her with your fake actual selection which she will counter and then hit her with the real name you want. For your fakeout I suggest Adolf.

[Coyote]

Cundellini.

Then, years from now when society breaks down, he and his friend Toecutter can find Max's wife, Jessie, and say, "This is Cundellini. And Cundellini want's his hand back..."

[Gandalf]

How about Bruce?

That way, the middle name can be Wayne.

[Phantasee]

How about Bruce?

That way, the middle name can be Wayne.

I thought I had a brilliant suggestion, but this tops everything.

[Kodiak]

My biggest obstacle is the wife. I want to give the boy a name like Cyrus or Maximilian or even Omicron, but then she comes back with names like Riley or Kale. It's a compromise, honestly, and I'll keep you all posted as this develops.

Your missing her tatic, you come back with slightly off the wall names(Which will set your child on THE PATH TO GREATNESS!) and she comes back with lazy-mctop ten baby names list.

Which is why you need to build a list of crazy names and then end it off with a named filled with success but so resonable that she's jump on it.

List of Unreasonable names to good for your child.
Grigori, Lex, Viktor, Gaius, Saul, Conan and of course Mumm-Ra
Satisfied that your wife is now conviced you are insane right after the Mumm-Ra you hit her with your fake actual selection which she will counter and then hit her with the real name you want. For your fakeout I suggest Adolf.

I think I might substitute Optimus for Mumm-Ra, but I do like your suggestion. Also, Bruce Wayne is sheer Brilliance but I'm afraid it might lead to my wife and I getting shot outside a theater when he's 10.

[Mr Bean]

I think I might substitute Optimus for Mumm-Ra, but I do like your suggestion. Also, Bruce Wayne is sheer Brilliance but I'm afraid it might lead to my wife and I getting shot outside a theater when he's 10.

Optimus works as well. However if your worried about being shot may I suggest never going to "the theater" after the kid hits about age six? You can watch DVD's until he's 14 can't you?

[Superman]

Kodiak, you're a genuinely good guy who even put up with my Mormon magic underwear comments. Congrats dude.

Now stop having kids, damnit. The planet is running out of resources. Just busting your balls, bro...

[Phantasee]

Don't go to the theatre, then. Plays aren't that good usually, anyway. Go to the cinema instead! Or the circus. I doubt there's an alternate reality where Batman's parents were shot outside a circus.

[Duckie]

Don't go to the theatre, then. Plays aren't that good usually, anyway. Go to the cinema instead! Or the circus. I doubt there's an alternate reality where Batman's parents were shot outside a circus.

There is- Dick Grayson's parents are shot inside a theatre and he becomes Batman and Bruce Wayne's are shot outside a circus so he becomes Grayson's sidekick, Robin.

[Phantasee]

Don't go to the theatre, then. Plays aren't that good usually, anyway. Go to the cinema instead! Or the circus. I doubt there's an alternate reality where Batman's parents were shot outside a circus.

There is- Dick Grayson's parents are shot inside a theatre and he becomes Batman and Bruce Wayne's are shot outside a circus so he becomes Grayson's sidekick, Robin.

:facepalm:

Of course there is. Fucking Robin.

[Kodiak]

Kodiak, you're a genuinely good guy who even put up with my Mormon magic underwear comments. Congrats dude.

Now stop having kids, damnit. The planet is running out of resources. Just busting your balls, bro...

Mormon children are raised on a strict diet of JelloTM and casserole made of leftovers (ever had a casserole casserole?) until they're 18, at which point we send them off to BYU or the UofU or maybe just a JC until they go on their mission. I've seen many Mormon families where they give all their kids names with the same first letter (Joseph, Jeremy, John, Jennie, Janice, Judy, etc.) and I vowed to put an end to that. As well I foreswore any and all "alternative spellings" to common names (my wife has a friend whose daughter is Madylenne- WTF was wrong with Madeline?). I think all in all we're planning on having 4 or 5 kids (my wife has the final say, really) and I'm fortunate enough to have a degree where I can provide for them.

And yes, DVD's until little Bruce Wayne Kodiak is 14 would surely be doable.

[Darth Wong]

and it's a BOY! I had to come straight back to the office, so I'll post pictures later. Now all we need is a name for the little guy. Right now our top choices are going for a junior (Kodiak Jr.), Owen, or Malcolm. I'm open to suggestions.

I'm a big fan of very solid, traditional names. Just look at how I named my own sons: David and Matthew.

First off let me tell you, a Jr means your a dick. Three Jr's mean your entering the George Forman scale(Five+ kids all named George). I mean come on, can you think of a bigger dick move then naming your kid after yourself?

May I recommend naming the kid after ooh I don't know old Final Fantasy Villains or perhaps former Prime Ministers of Canada?
That's how you get a name you'll remember and will set you child on the path to success
Or you know, you can set him on the path to failure and call him something like Owen. Malcolm is only passable if you give him some sort of kick ass middle name.

My biggest obstacle is the wife. I want to give the boy a name like Cyrus or Maximilian or even Omicron, but then she comes back with names like Riley or Kale. It's a compromise, honestly, and I'll keep you all posted as this develops.

Just remember that he might have to give his name to someone over the phone someday. It's nice to have a name where nobody ever has to ask twice.

[Alyrium Denryle]

Congrats on your fitness maximizing male offspring may he provide you many many grandkids, not necessarily all with the same females (You might not prefer this, but genetic variation is good) so as to increase the genetic diversity of your grand-progeny and (through increased chances that at least some of your offspring have adaptive phenotypes) ensure the representation of your genes in the gene pool until an asteroid or nuclear holocaust wipes out humanity

Also: I would go with Owen. I know an unbelievably sexy US Marine/Primatologist named Owen, you cant go wrong with that one.