The truth about Phasers

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NecronLord
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The truth about Phasers

Post by NecronLord »

Today I recieved this peice of Junk-mail
Everyone.Benefits!™ has teamed up with Xerox to provide you with this special offer.

Make the shift to fast full throttle brilliant COLOR!
Finally an affordable, high-performance office color laser printer!

Introducing the NEW Phaser® 6200...
• 16 ppm COLOR at FULL 2400 dpi resolution
• FASTER than 90% of today's office printers
• High speed 500 MHz PowerPC processor
• The easiest color laser to use - ever!

Enter here for a chance to WIN!
50" HDTV Flat Plasma Screen Television ($15,999 USD value)
or Xerox Phaser 6200 Color Laser Printer ($1,999 USD value)
Thats right Phaser is a Xerox Trade Mark! The fed's main weapon is in-fact a color printer!
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Post by Mr Bean »

Before anyone else can

Sir! The Toner is going critical!


Look out he's packing Toner!

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Post by NecronLord »

CAPTAIN: ENSIGN SPEAKING PART, REMODULATE THE PHASER ARRAY!

Ensign: Pardon Captain?

CAPTAIN: CHANGE THE CATRIGES!
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Post by Alyeska »

Heh, anyone who has attempted to search for phaser props on E-bay has known this for a while now. :D
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Post by NecronLord »

Heh, and you trekkies have been keeping it quiet?
Conspiracy!!
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Post by SirNitram »

And now I will steal a Xerox copier to perform rigorous combat tests of Xerox Machien With Phaser Vs. Crazy Hick With Shotgun.

I'll be back soon.
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Post by Typhonis 1 »

Ohhhh the possibilities.... What the Frell???? It was supposed to fry him not pint his face yelllow
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Post by StarshipTitanic »

The TOS phasers must have been loaded with eraser fluid since it can make various amounts of matter disappear with impunity.
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Post by NecronLord »

Ensign:Captain our weapons have no effect

Captain: OH NO! Theyr'e Laminated!
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Post by Mr Bean »

Ensign:Captain our weapons have no effect

Captain: OH NO! Theyr'e Laminated
ROTFMAO!

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Post by NecronLord »

Worf and co fighting borg

Ensign: They've Laminated!

Crew: ARGHHHHHHH!!!!

Crew bail out in escape pods.
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Post by SirNitram »

I bring you the result of the Phaser Vs. The Shotgun-Wielding Hick:

Hick: 5
Phaser: 0
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Post by NecronLord »

Heh, just out of curiosity did the police come and remove the hick from the xerox plant after 5?
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Post by SirNitram »

NecronLord wrote:Heh, just out of curiosity did the police come and remove the hick from the xerox plant after 5?

Nah, I used broken Xerox's which were going to Xerox Hell anyway.
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Post by NecronLord »

Theres a xerox hell? :shock: I wonder how the fundies will take that? :D :twisted: :roll:
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Post by SirNitram »

NecronLord wrote:Theres a xerox hell? :shock: I wonder how the fundies will take that? :D :twisted: :roll:
We can Xerox them and find out.
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