ARRGH (ROTK spoilers)

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-12-22 11:03am

Spoilers to rotk below, the gist being it bit ass. Read no farther if you don't want the plot revealed.

ROTK bit ass. The ruined so fucking much i'm pissed as hell. They eliminated the battle over the shire between hobbits and Sharky (aka saruman), the fucked up the shelob scene, they removed any and all reference to adverse affects from striking the witch king anagmar, they removed the whole " the hands of the king are the hands of a healer " bit, they fucked up the planitir scene, they ruined the tower scene (when frodo was captured) by removing the watcher, they removed that city gaurd dude (the one who kept faramir and denethir from burning long enough for gandalf to get there). And _THAT_ is just what i can think of off the top of my head. Peter Jackson is a fucking moron. He did perfectly well on the first two then just fucking RUINED the best fucking book in the goddamned series!!! Fucking bastard!!!

That helped soooo much.

The Cleric · Post by **The Cleric** » 2003-12-22 11:07am

The movie was 3.5 hours long. How long did you want him to make it? It would have been insane if he actually got everything in (however, I haven't seen it yet. So I can't comment on the fucked-up-ness of the book -> movie).

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-12-22 11:10am

Before this saunters off in the general direction of fantasy section, I would have been quite happy to sit there for another hour at most, would have needed a 10 min interval, as there were several points where they could have taken a break, Sam's realisation that he let Frodo be captured, for example, they could have stopped there (I forget where it was in the film), as that's where TTT ends in the text form, and they could have left a lot more in and the film would have felt more complete, although bloody sore on the arse.

Trytostaydead · Post by **Trytostaydead** » 2003-12-22 11:22am

Eh.. I was actually disappointed by the movie. I thought a lot of the scenes became slow and stagnant and usage of colors really bugged me for some reason.

I also thought there was some homoerotic relationship between Frodo and Sam and was just waiting for one of their hugging sessions to turn to lip-locking and so forth...

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-12-22 11:57am

Trytostaydead wrote:Eh.. I was actually disappointed by the movie. I thought a lot of the scenes became slow and stagnant and usage of colors really bugged me for some reason.

I also thought there was some homoerotic relationship between Frodo and Sam and was just waiting for one of their hugging sessions to turn to lip-locking and so forth...

I got the same vibe from all that moronic hugging.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-12-22 12:42pm

Are you kidding me? The Scouring of the Shire sucked and blew. Jackson deserves a fucking Pulitzer for cutting it out. Merry did get his arm burned a bit from striking Angmar, but, frankly, that, and the whole hands of the King deal were not necessary to the plot, nor was the guard.

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-12-22 12:43pm

Purist wieners.

Trytostaydead · Post by **Trytostaydead** » 2003-12-22 01:14pm

And the "I am not a man" really just made me scratch my head. Why would the sex of the person matter?!!!

Post by **RogueIce** » 2003-12-22 01:15pm

Gah! Can't we make it a rule that if you put a spoiler notice in the title, you don't need to tinytext it? It's not so bad in here because it's only the one post, but it's worse elsewhere and this is just where I felt like ranting.

Anyway, having never read the books, I can't say any of it was fucked up.

The only bit that annoyed me was the "I am no man!" scene. Just the way she had to say it before striking him and all, and her tone. If she killed him, then whipped off the helmet and said it, maybe more softly, woulda been cooler. But that's just me.

Oh, and as for homoeroticism... I would've sworn it was Merry and Whatshisface who were the gay lovers.

And, I guess they lived in the book and stuff, but I woulda thought it would be cool to have Frodo and Sam die in the end, or at least just Frodo. Y'know, the whole "I'm thinking there won't be a return journey, Mr. Frodo" line and all?

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-12-22 01:18pm

Trytostaydead wrote:And the "I am not a man" really just made me scratch my head. Why would the sex of the person matter?!!!

Boy... you really missed that, didn't you.

The WitchKing states that 'No Man can kill me'. Therefore, Eowyn, being a woman, is able to stab him through the helm and destroy him.... with the helpful hamstring from Merry's Westerness dagger. (And no, Hobbits aren't Men either

)

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-12-22 01:20pm

Do you realize just how anti-climatic and pointless the scouring of the Shire really is? I don't care if Tolkien wrote it.

StarshipTitanic · Post by **StarshipTitanic** » 2003-12-22 01:20pm

So Eowyn is a semantics whore?

Demiurge · Post by **Demiurge** » 2003-12-22 01:28pm

Yeah, it needed to be longer. That's exactly what a 3.5 hour movie needs.

Companion Cube · Post by **Companion Cube** » 2003-12-22 01:43pm

Hell, the Scouring of the Shire was something that should've been cut from the book, let alone the film...

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2003-12-22 02:05pm

darthdavid wrote:Spoilers to rotk below, the gist being it bit ass. Read no farther if you don't want the plot revealed.

ROTK bit ass. The ruined so fucking much i'm pissed as hell. They eliminated the battle over the shire between hobbits and Sharky (aka saruman)

Anti-climatic and would have taken up quite a bit of time.

the fucked up the shelob scene

I didn't think it was bad.

they removed any and all reference to adverse affects from striking the witch king anagmar

And those two screaming and then clutching their arms as they stuck the Witch-King don't count?

they removed the whole " the hands of the king are the hands of a healer " bit

Time constraints, probably.

they fucked up the planitir scene

While it would have been nice if Aragon showed himself to the Sauron directly, I didn't think it was so bad.

they ruined the tower scene (when frodo was captured) by removing the watcher, they removed that city gaurd dude (the one who kept faramir and denethir from burning long enough for gandalf to get there). And _THAT_ is just what i can think of off the top of my head. Peter Jackson is a fucking moron. He did perfectly well on the first two then just fucking RUINED the best fucking book in the goddamned series!!! Fucking bastard!!!

What, do you want a five-hour-long movie that goes over ROTK in precise detail? Think about how much extra time -- even if you deleted Arwen's scenes -- all that stuff would take!

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-12-22 02:06pm

StormTrooperTR889 wrote:The movie was 3.5 hours long.

Dayam, it felt like only 90 minutes when I watched it.

I'm sure part of it was that I made DAMN GOOD sure that I wouldn't have to use the bathroom...

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2003-12-22 02:07pm

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
StormTrooperTR889 wrote:The movie was 3.5 hours long.
Dayam, it felt like only 90 minutes when I watched it.

3.33 hours, actually, and the last 20 minutes are credits, IIRC.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-12-22 02:09pm

The scouring is the fixing up of home aspect, just like Sheridan fixing Earth in b5(which should've been s5 mio) and i thought it was necessary, personally, to show it fucked over and burning, even if we didn't find out how it was fixed. Then when sam's got the book it'd make more sense for the adventure part of it, and it could show a montage of the shire being rebuilt.

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-12-22 03:10pm

Demiurge wrote:Yeah, it needed to be longer. That's exactly what a 3.5 hour movie needs.

IMO, the film suffered from having so much cut out of it, there were points when scenes jumped or seemed to cut too quickly, maybe I am just being purist about it, but I'd have rather sat there for another 30 minutes if it meant that the film felt like it hadnt been hurriedly hacked apart for New Line.

And as far as the Scouring of the Shire went, it may have been anti climactic but in the book it means that not even the shire escapes the changes of the War. It just felt a bit rich to have everything suddenly go back to normal, I can appreciate why, to show how little the shire changes and all that, but it felt like a big red reset button.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-12-22 03:29pm

Sorry the Shire scouring is sorta like adding that extra bump to a rollar coaster that extends into the clouds.

It's frivolous.

As for the rest of it...sorry if Jackson didn't go detail by detail, and yes there are a couple nits, but seriously the series was GOOD.

Given the potential of utter cluster fuck....I'm damn happy how well it tutrned out.

StarshipTitanic · Post by **StarshipTitanic** » 2003-12-22 03:44pm

I wish we could have seen more of Saruman.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-12-22 04:08pm

Oh and sarumans staff was NEVER FUCKING BROKEN. So now with gandalf and sauron gone saruman has a staff and plenty of time to plot an escape from orthanac. It would've taken 5 minutes to show gandalf breaking the staff and worm tounge dropping the planitir buuut nooooo, were just going to leave one of the most powerful wizzards ever sitting around gaining power to do evil crap.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-12-22 04:09pm

Oh and for all you time morons, were there not 6 fucking books? Make it based on the 6 fucking books. Hell i'd love that. Then you'd have 6 movies and you could do it fucking right. Fucking morons.

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-12-22 04:13pm

darthdavid wrote:Oh and for all you time morons, were there not 6 fucking books? Make it based on the 6 fucking books. Hell i'd love that. Then you'd have 6 movies and you could do it fucking right. Fucking morons.

DD?
Chill.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-12-22 04:24pm

DD, you are the most pathetic fucking idiotic Tolkien fanwanker I've ever seen. For fuck's sakes, it is a goddamn movie! Jesus Chirst, get a fucking grip.

I'm frankly glad they cut a bunch of bullshit like that Bombadil dipshit and the scouring of the shire. Boring bullshit, all of it. Kudos to Jackson for making the movies shine in ways the books did not.

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

ARRGH (ROTK spoilers)

ARRGH (ROTK spoilers)

Re: ARRGH (ROTK spoilers)