What would Chris Tolkiens most likely response to KJA be?

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-10-20 03:23am

Hypothetically if KJA started pesterin Christopher Tolkien about writting a bunch of Middle Earth Stories Which would characterize Tolkien's response.

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2003-10-20 03:31am

Summon the Lawyer Balrogs! The best of both worlds, so to speak!

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-10-20 03:57am

That's what I was thinking too, purhaps with a few Mirkwood process servers.....

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2003-10-20 04:57am

"Piss off!"

Joe Momma · Post by **Joe Momma** » 2003-10-20 05:16am

It might actually be favorable. After all, KJA seems to be working well with Brian Herbert. Both Brian Herbert and Christopher Tolkien are making a living on the leftovers of their fathers' works like the remnants of a ghoul's feast (unfortunately, neither of them could find a wood-chipper machine that would let them feed their dads' bodies into one end and have cash shoot out the other side). There's a foundation for some great books there!

KJA and CT present: Aragorn's Hobbit Fighter Academy! Watch them forge all new rings to fight Wormtooth's dreaded Goblin Assassin School!

-- Joe Momma

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2003-10-20 05:29am

The difference between Christopher Tolkien and Brian Herbert is that Tolkien actually respects his father's work...

Darth_Shinji · Post by **Darth_Shinji** » 2003-10-20 09:46am

"I would let you write some KJA, but my fathers spirit in the form of Morgoth materlized in the middle of my diner room and told me he'll stick Morgoth's warhammer so far up my ass I'll be the world's first human popisicle."

*Summon's the Lawyer Balrogs*

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-10-20 10:30am

*sound of .44 being cocked*

"You may not PASS!"

Sorry...somehow I think Brian is on drugs or whatnot...but I don't think ANYONE is going to let KJA start fucking with the fundementals of their universe.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-10-20 12:18pm

Ummm...before I respond...what is KJA?

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-10-20 12:19pm

Chardok wrote:Ummm...before I respond...what is KJA?

Kevin J Anderson...a writer(debateable...but has been published) of Science Fiction.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-10-20 12:20pm

Chardok wrote:Ummm...before I respond...what is KJA?

Kevin J. Anderson, a sci-fi author who fucked up the SW EU and is now proceeding to fuck up Dune.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-10-20 12:34pm

Hmm...Well, I don't think any wruter short of Tolkien himself could expound anymore upon The world of Middle Earth accurately or enjoyably. (is that a word?) it is so very complex and deep, the the original author himself could only know the many intricacies of said world, and even Tolkien has changed his mind and written contradictions of his own work. If he had but lived to be 200 years old, he may have perfected middle earth beyond what it is today. I honestly just don't see or forsee any author ever being able to make middle earth "Better" and I sincerely hope nobody tries.

Well, I guess I should correct myself. Certain side items, famous people and the like and their adventures might be fun to read, but, I mean, most everyone and everything is covered in the Silmarillion and, to a lesser extent, The Books of Lost Tales. Even the movies omitted HUGE parts of the book, much to my dismay. Though I enjoy the movies immensely, one can't help but speculate the theory of money grubbing offspring as the cause of the movies not being done to many people's liking is largely correct. (I may have mentioned before one of my favorite parts of the fellowship is the group of Hobbit's journey out of the shire, and their encounter with Tom Bombadil and the Barrow wights.) In short, I would say that Tolkien's response would be something akin to "Go fuck yourself." Or the stereotypically polite English equivalent.

Take from that what you will.

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2003-10-20 01:19pm

Joe Momma wrote:KJA and CT present: Aragorn's Hobbit Fighter Academy! Watch them forge all new rings to fight Wormtooth's dreaded Goblin Assassin School!

-- Joe Momma

*Cries * It would happen too!! Ugh, I should kill you jsut for saying that...I really should.

Let the Lawyer Balrogs burn the fucker.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-10-20 01:38pm

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Hypothetically if KJA started pesterin Christopher Tolkien about writting a bunch of Middle Earth Stories Which would characterize Tolkien's response.

Lawyer Balrogs.

Christopher Tolkien might be making a nice living off his father's work but he's show a great deal of respect and passion for his father's work. There's no question he would be absolutely opposed to any bastardised spin off. He opposed the movies for christ's sake. KJA wouldn't get past the door mat.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-10-20 01:42pm

Oh, and I picked the elvish siege thing.

LordShaithis · Post by **LordShaithis** » 2003-10-20 02:14pm

Though I enjoy the movies immensely, one can't help but speculate the theory of money grubbing offspring as the cause of the movies not being done to many people's liking is largely correct.

If they included everything, the movies would have each been six hours long. Furthermore, any attempt to put Tom Bombadil on film would have resulted in moviegoers fleeing the theater while roaring with derisive laughter.

Typhonis 1 · Post by **Typhonis 1** » 2003-10-20 02:26pm

Summon the Balrog lawyers with the King of the Ringwraiths serving the documents.

I think Christopher is doing the right thing so far heck theres even MERP to add more info if need be

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-10-20 02:44pm

Though I enjoy the movies immensely, one can't help but speculate the theory of money grubbing offspring as the cause of the movies not being done to many people's liking is largely correct. (I may have mentioned before one of my favorite parts of the fellowship is the group of Hobbit's journey out of the shire, and their encounter with Tom Bombadil and the Barrow wights.)

You realize that Tolkien's immediate family actualy opposed the movie? If they were money grubbing they long ago would have lincensed the hell out of the stories. Instead they actually limited the stuff licensed and have critisized the movie for over merchandising.

Those parts were cut because they would have killed the film. While they added to the book, as a part of the movie they would slowed it down to little point. As it is the movies are two and half hours long, including more, material that's less relevant would have only hurt them.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-10-20 03:44pm

No, I was not aware that the family was opposed to the movies. it just seemed that way to me since the movies certainly weren't made while Tolkien was alive (With the exception of the animated ones)...

tom bombadil would NOT make people run from the thearter laughing. He is part of what makes middle earth so endearing; immortal, timeless, powerful. and the adventure in the barow-downs would not, IMHO detract from the movie at all. Again, IMHO, I think the journey out of the shire and to rivendell was shortened too much, as that was a HUGE part of the book. too much time was spent on the council of elrond and subsequent journey to that...umm.....forest.....crap...the name eludes me...and I got a copy of FotR right there.....
Too bad. I'm at work.

I use IMHO too much. Shutting up now sir!

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2003-10-20 03:48pm

NONE of the films were made when JRR Tolkien was alive. He died in 1974, years before any of the animated films appeared.

Now shut up and stop kissing our asses.

dworkin · Post by **dworkin** » 2003-10-20 03:59pm

Chardok wrote: tom bombadil would NOT make people run from the thearter laughing. He is part of what makes middle earth so endearing; immortal, timeless, powerful. and the adventure in the barow-downs would not, IMHO detract from the movie at all. Again, IMHO, I think the journey out of the shire and to rivendell was shortened too much, as that was a HUGE part of the book. too much time was spent on the council of elrond and subsequent journey to that...umm.....forest.....crap...the name eludes me...and I got a copy of FotR right there.....
Too bad. I'm at work.

I dunno. Unless you were raised on the stuff (like all good children were) the trip from the Shire to Bree is dead boring. Most cannot get past that part. I often recomend, especially to younger readers to skip that part if their reading the 3-book or 1-book format. Actually I try to get them to read the 7-book set since this makes the entire process managable.

And the main reason KJA should not write anything is that he would give Balrogs wings.

NeoGoomba · Post by **NeoGoomba** » 2003-10-20 04:02pm

Has there been any response from the Tolkien family about the movies yet? I know one grandson of JRR did in fact endorse the movie, thus getting him expunged from the Tolkien Estate. But now that the series is just about over, has any other family members made comment on it?

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-10-20 05:13pm

Stormbringer wrote:
Though I enjoy the movies immensely, one can't help but speculate the theory of money grubbing offspring as the cause of the movies not being done to many people's liking is largely correct. (I may have mentioned before one of my favorite parts of the fellowship is the group of Hobbit's journey out of the shire, and their encounter with Tom Bombadil and the Barrow wights.)
You realize that Tolkien's immediate family actualy opposed the movie? If they were money grubbing they long ago would have lincensed the hell out of the stories. Instead they actually limited the stuff licensed and have critisized the movie for over merchandising.

Those parts were cut because they would have killed the film. While they added to the book, as a part of the movie they would slowed it down to little point. As it is the movies are two and half hours long, including more, material that's less relevant would have only hurt them.

Agreed, whilst the fact that Bombadil is the only one over whom the ring has no power, and the fact that he makes reference to being present since before the coming of Morgroth are both rather atmospheric and important (not necessarily to the story) facts, there is no way they could have been put into the film. And their absence serves as a reminder to us all not to confuse book and film.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-10-20 06:04pm

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:NONE of the films were made when JRR Tolkien was alive. He died in 1974, years before any of the animated films appeared.

Now shut up and stop kissing our asses.

My mistake, they were out in '78.
Oh and

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-10-20 06:22pm

NeoGoomba wrote:Has there been any response from the Tolkien family about the movies yet? I know one grandson of JRR did in fact endorse the movie, thus getting him expunged from the Tolkien Estate. But now that the series is just about over, has any other family members made comment on it?

He wasn't disinherieted, he was at best a minor relation to begin with and they basically told them he had no right implying the Estate officially approved.

The family's official line has simply been no comment. A few have let it be known unofficially that they feel the movies are adequate but are very much opposed to the merchandising. None of them are happy with some of the story alterations the movie made (they grew up on parts of the story after all) but were not exactly displeased by the final product.

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

What would Chris Tolkiens most likely response to KJA be?

Mostlyly Response

What would Chris Tolkiens most likely response to KJA be?

Re: What would Chris Tolkiens most likely response to KJA be