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Quote of the Week: "History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives." - Abba Eban, Israeli statesman (1915-2002)


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 Post subject: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-17 08:07am
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(Note: A mixture of bad health and being busy means I'm not in a state to think too intelligently, so I'm going to just ask people their views and not comment since I can't properly)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_(mythology)

Assumptions:
-You are in Paris's posistion, with the prospects of sucess and failure
-You have your knowledge of Greek myth in general, but don't know things relating to Paris/the Trojan War- that is OOC info you can't use.
-In the case of inconsistent myths where Paris wouldn't know, you've heard conflicting stories and haven't verified either version
-Slight potential variation: Aphrodite being genuinely the most beautiful vs the three being equally beautiful.
-What you want out of life and your personality remains the same, but somehow you're in this posistion anyway

What would you do?

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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-17 10:06am
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Straight up myth with no alteration RAR? That's new.

The obvious choice is Athena, she's most consistent in her blessings and favor. Love of the world's most beautiful woman? For how long, and how will it end? King of the World? Same question. Wisest man in the world and never loses a fight? Not really something anyone but the gods can take away. And if I wanted to be king of the world (I don't) now I have the option of getting there the hard way.

Of course, prince of a wealthy and civilized nation when it happens will suit me just fine. I can live in luxury while playing around at making people's lives better and nevermind the filthy barbarians around the Aegean.



"Any plan which requires the direct intervention of any deity to work can be assumed to be a very poor one."- Newbiespud

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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-17 01:38pm
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Before delivering my choice, I'd say I could not render a verdict that no harm be done to me or my fellows for the decision being made.

Because I know my myths and Gods are pricks.

Int he end, I'd go with Athena -- and Justify it. If Aphrodite is the most physically beautiful off the gods, I'd say Beauty is more than that. Talents, skills for long term care -- those all exist in both Hera and Athena. But Athena edged out as simply a mater of the judge's wants as a young man. her Talents have a broader range and greater attraction for Young Man. Therefore, she is the most Beautiful of the three to the judge.

By choosing one Judge, they have to abide by his opinion primarily.

. . .

I'm so getting Thunderbolted.



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-17 07:34pm
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Hottes chick there man. Bada-bing!



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-17 07:37pm
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Well wait a second... I'm me... just in Paris's body basically... so, I am literally like God's gift to women?

Sheeeeeit, I tell the Gods to hold their Trojan Horses and I go on a "I'm too sexy for my shirt" world tour. I mean we are talking sex with pretty much any woman I want PRE STDs! Jackpot!

The worst thing that happens is that I start a war right? :lol:



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-17 11:43pm
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Havok wrote:
Well wait a second... I'm me... just in Paris's body basically... so, I am literally like God's gift to women?

Sheeeeeit, I tell the Gods to hold their Trojan Horses and I go on a "I'm too sexy for my shirt" world tour. I mean we are talking sex with pretty much any woman I want PRE STDs! Jackpot!

The worst thing that happens is that I start a war right? :lol:


Wait, what?

You think the body of a shepherd makes you "God's gift to women?"



"Any plan which requires the direct intervention of any deity to work can be assumed to be a very poor one."- Newbiespud

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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-18 02:10am
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Dude... he was so good looking that his beauty betrayed his royalty. :lol:



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-18 05:51am
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wasn't that AFTER Aphrodite blessed him?

the problem I have is if you pick athena, you get aphrodite and hera after you. Permanent impotence, warts and halitosis and then I get to spend my life running from Hera ala Hercules.



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-18 06:03am
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You are screwed if you pick any of the three.

My way is much better. :D



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-18 02:05pm
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I'm with Gojira. Before rendering any decision, extract binding oaths from all three not to seek any retribution for my choice. The Olympians are reknowned for their petty vindictiveness, so you have to do something to protect yourself.



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-18 02:53pm
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must resist temptation to make bad voyager joke about siccing ones pregnant klingon girlfriend on the spartans.

have to go with give apple to eris' twin sister, (this obviously brlongs to truth and harmony since it's from discord)



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-18 11:03pm
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Option 1: I mix mythologies and split the apple into three equal parts, saying that no mere mortal's eyes could possibly judge this contest properly.

Option 2: I smash the apple, then snort it.



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-19 12:40am
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Actually this is a classic. Several women ask you to rate them, you're f-ed.

The best thing is to negotiate on your own terms, ask Aphrodite for your choice in women, Athena is probably the wisest option, the least likely to backfire, but the least likely to benefit one's self, Hera. Well, you can't really have any of the options offered without the other two.



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-19 03:19am
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I still figure that knowing who the apple is from giving it to eris' sister who nade no claim for iy\t would actually work as Ares and Aphrodite;s kid primary job is patching these kinda things up. I just wish I could remember yhe name of the goddess of harmony



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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-19 10:03am
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The Yosemite Bear wrote:
I still figure that knowing who the apple is from giving it to eris' sister who nade no claim for iy\t would actually work as Ares and Aphrodite;s kid primary job is patching these kinda things up. I just wish I could remember yhe name of the goddess of harmony


Harmonia
http://www.pantheon.org/articles/h/harmonia.html



"This is supposed to be a happy occasion... Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who."
-- The King of Swamp Castle, Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"Nothing of consequence happened today. " -- Diary of King George III, July 4, 1776

"This is not bad; this is a conspiracy to remove happiness from existence. It seeks to wrap its hedgehog hand around the still beating heart of the personification of good and squeeze until it is stilled."
-- Chuck Sonnenburg on Voyager's "Elogium"

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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-19 04:55pm
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Interesting Scenario.

First, I request they elevate me to divinity, even temporarily, as no mortal is qualified to judge divine beauty.

Then, I point out to them Discord is probably doing this to get them upset with each other and cause problems.

Then, if they STILL want me to judge, I do so on the condition they accept the judgement, and no consequences towards mortals.
Zeus and every other Olympian Deity has to agree to reinforce this clause.

Then, I tell them I've made my decision, and give up my divinity.

Then I ask them "So, which one wants to marry me, elevate me to divinity for permanent, have a family, and not horse around on me with another male?"

Then, if they decide to blow me apart or smite me or something, I give the Apple to Perspheone, so she can talk Hades into transfering me to Elysium.
(Cause I know those three are about to send me to afterlife).

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 Post subject: Re: Paris's Choice RAR PostPosted: 2012-10-20 06:39am
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I give the apple to Persephone, and ask her to put in a good word with Hades for me so I become basically immortal.

Then the other three goddesses team up to capture me, tie me to a rock and drip acid in my eyes for the next thousand years, and I curse whatever fates got me stuck dealing with Olympus.



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