Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

FAN: Discuss various fictional worlds that don't qualify for SF.

Moderator: Steve

User avatar
One Two
Youngling
Posts: 93
Joined: 2011-10-09 12:05am

Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby One Two » 2012-09-04 04:55pm

I thought this was gonna be an animated movie, after seeing this trailer I have no idea why I thought that, but you have got to be shitting me with this.



With that said, I'll still check it out.

User avatar
Rogue 9
Scrapping TIEs since 1997
Posts: 17335
Joined: 2003-11-12 01:10pm
Location: Classified
Contact:

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Rogue 9 » 2012-09-04 05:51pm

What the hell did I just watch? :lol:
Image
It's Rogue, not Rouge!

HAB | KotL | VRWC/ELC/CDA | TRotR | The Anti-Confederate | Sluggite | Gamer | Blogger | Staff Reporter | Student | Musician

User avatar
LadyTevar
White Mage
White Mage
Posts: 18447
Joined: 2003-02-12 10:59pm
Location: Tahalshia Manor

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby LadyTevar » 2012-09-04 05:52pm

Ok, so it's going off the "Brothers Grimm" and the "Van Helsing" style of movie, but I think this will be highly entertaining no-brainer popcorn movie.
Image

Librium Arcana, Where Gamers Play!
Nitram, slightly high on cough syrup: Do you know you're beautiful?
Me: Nope, that's why I have you around to tell me.
Nitram: You -are- beautiful. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise kill them.
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP" -- Leonard Nimoy, last Tweet

User avatar
Spekio
Jedi Knight
Posts: 762
Joined: 2009-09-15 12:34pm
Location: Brazil

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Spekio » 2012-09-04 06:12pm

t's either great or awful, because:

I've watched the trailer three times now, and I still have no idea. The problem is that I don't know if the film knows how fucking dumb it is or not; if it has the slightest bit of self-awareness about its ludicrous premise, its godawful story, and insanely awful dialoge, that's one thing -- but if it doesn't, and it believes its actually a really cool movie about two badass siblings who fight witches with weapons Hugh Jackman's Van Helsing would find overelaborate, well... fuck. All I know is that there appears to be a witch with a gatling gun. But is that so dumb it's awesome, or so dumb it shoots right past awesome and ends up dumb again? I have no idea!

User avatar
LadyTevar
White Mage
White Mage
Posts: 18447
Joined: 2003-02-12 10:59pm
Location: Tahalshia Manor

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby LadyTevar » 2012-09-04 07:07pm

I think it's going to hit the A-Team Sequel "Steer a falling tank by firing its main gun" dumb-to-awesome.
Image

Librium Arcana, Where Gamers Play!
Nitram, slightly high on cough syrup: Do you know you're beautiful?
Me: Nope, that's why I have you around to tell me.
Nitram: You -are- beautiful. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise kill them.
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP" -- Leonard Nimoy, last Tweet

User avatar
Ahriman238
Sith Marauder
Posts: 4854
Joined: 2011-04-22 11:04pm
Location: Ocularis Terribus.

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Ahriman238 » 2012-09-04 10:17pm

I wonder if this isn't partially based on Fable, where Hansel became a witchhunter.

There is a red-headed witch in a medieval castle with a gatling gun. That probably guarantees I'll at least rent it.
"Any plan which requires the direct intervention of any deity to work can be assumed to be a very poor one."- Newbiespud

Simon_Jester
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 27387
Joined: 2009-05-23 07:29pm

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Simon_Jester » 2012-09-05 06:10am

I kind of dislike the trend of them making big graphics extravaganzas for grownups out of fairy tale material. It seems like the act of an industry that's having trouble finding creative inspiration, so they decide to bank off the name recognition of the classic fairy tale characters.

When I see a big extravaganza movie, I want the creative impulse behind the movie to be there to explain the extravaganza, not just there to justify having one.

User avatar
Vendetta
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 9992
Joined: 2002-07-07 04:57pm
Location: Sheffield, UK
Contact:

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Vendetta » 2012-09-05 11:52am

One would have thought the natural way to adapt Hansel & Gretel would be a Blair Witch style found footage handycam job.

Alkaloid
Jedi Master
Posts: 1020
Joined: 2011-03-21 07:59am

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Alkaloid » 2012-09-06 07:48am

So yeah, I'm going to love this, but I also seem to be the only person on the planet who actually liked the Brothers Grimm.

Scrib
Jedi Knight
Posts: 966
Joined: 2011-11-19 11:59pm

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Scrib » 2012-09-06 08:27pm

Simon_Jester wrote:I kind of dislike the trend of them making big graphics extravaganzas for grownups out of fairy tale material. It seems like the act of an industry that's having trouble funding creative inspiration, so they decide to bank off the name recognition of the classic fairy tale characters.

When I see a big extravaganza movie, I want the creative impulse behind the movie to be there to explain the extravaganza, not just there to justify having one.


Fixed that for you. They could find a bunch of good products, they just don't care enough to risk their money

I don't like these types of movies because they simply don't resonate with me, and I have a mild dislike of them remaking everything, but this looks stupid enough for me to see. As others have said as long as it's tongue in cheek it could be interesting.

User avatar
LadyTevar
White Mage
White Mage
Posts: 18447
Joined: 2003-02-12 10:59pm
Location: Tahalshia Manor

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby LadyTevar » 2012-09-06 10:18pm

Alkaloid wrote:So yeah, I'm going to love this, but I also seem to be the only person on the planet who actually liked the Brothers Grimm.

Nitram and I enjoyed Brothers Grimm.
Image

Librium Arcana, Where Gamers Play!
Nitram, slightly high on cough syrup: Do you know you're beautiful?
Me: Nope, that's why I have you around to tell me.
Nitram: You -are- beautiful. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise kill them.
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP" -- Leonard Nimoy, last Tweet

User avatar
Crossroads Inc.
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8722
Joined: 2005-03-20 06:26pm
Location: Defending Sparkeling Bishonen
Contact:

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Crossroads Inc. » 2012-09-07 08:37am

Personally I am just miffed about the whole "Evil Witch" thing...

I mean, sure, a witch CAN go bad... but "Witch Hunters" has the same ring as Vampire Hunters, IE ALL Witches are evil cackling ladies out to eat childern!

I always thought the whole story was a bit one sided really. I mean you only have the kids side of the story afterall! No one cares about the Witch in this! I mean, cooking childern in an oven? That has to be a REALLY Big oven! And how do they know she is a witch in any case? Just because an old women is a little strange and looks wierd she is a witch? All bloody suspicious if you ask me!
Image
Praying is another way of doing nothing helpful
"Congratulations, you get a cookie. You almost got a fundamental English word correct." Pick
"Outlaw star has spaceships that punch eachother" Joviwan
Read "Tales From The Crossroads"!
Read "One Wrong Turn"!

User avatar
Spoonist
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2399
Joined: 2002-09-20 11:15am

Re: Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters Official Trailer

Postby Spoonist » 2012-09-07 10:31am

Yes Crossie, yes yes yes. And those kids were of no use anyway, and their legs just looked so juicy. I mean they had it commin tempting me that way. I mean what's a warlock to do with all these tempting kids these days? Huh, witches you say? Oh, sorry never mind me. I'll just munch on this eh, this eh, turkey bone. That's right turkey bone dressed with shoes, for fun. Oh, what the hell where are those monkeys when you need them *teleports away in a huff of smoke*.


Return to “Fantasy”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Lord Revan and 1 guest