Ship That Deserve Mocking

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Abacus
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Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Abacus »

Hey all. So, here in this thread I would like everyone to (a) remember that this is mostly in jest and that (b) we've long come to the conclusion that there are times when our favorite thing (ie Star Wars) is silly beyond words. As such, in light of coming across what can only be described as the Fridge-class Star Fridge, I've decided that we needed a bit of deserved lancing at ship designs and concepts that are just...dumb. Silly. Absurd. Ridiculous. Etc, etc, etc.

So, post a link or image to a ship (any class or size) and explain why you think it's foolish or silly.


My example: The Razor-class Frigate, which does nothing to live up to that name. To be fair to the artists, he did admit that "if he had a chance to do it, again, he would with a sleeker design with far more weapons emplacements."
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Rhadamantus »

That's a garbage can.
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Khaat
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Khaat »

Not a garbage truck?
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(That's the Quark, from the show of the same name. Edit: Sorry, Quark is the captain's name.)
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Captain Seafort »

Rhadamantus wrote:That's a garbage can.
It looks like an LCA with an ISD bridge tower.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Adam Reynolds »

The Star Wars EU has more than enough examples of this, but nothing beats this:
Image

Though that was the same battle that included actual arrows:
Image

Fortunately the Darth Bane trilogy mostly rewrote this to actually be sensible and more in line with the films and KOTOR(as it was written by Drew Karpynshen, who also wrote KOTOR and Mass Effect 1). I would love to see all of this remain in canon, though I won't hold my breath.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Lord Revan »

At least that monstrosity was later rewrote as ceremonial ship for a high ranking Jedi master (both within the order and among his own race) so it not looking like a practical warship makes some degree of sense, also the way it's depicted in the novels reminds me more of the eldar ships from WH40K then a 17th century man-o-war.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Imperial528 »

Abacus wrote:My example: The Razor-class Frigate, which does nothing to live up to that name. To be fair to the artists, he did admit that "if he had a chance to do it, again, he would with a sleeker design with far more weapons emplacements."
It's not quite a razor, but....

Image
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Rhadamantus »

What would the possible rationale for that even be?
"There is no justice in the laws of nature, no term for fairness in the equations of motion. The Universe is neither evil, nor good, it simply does not care. The stars don't care, or the Sun, or the sky.

But they don't have to! WE care! There IS light in the world, and it is US!"

"There is no destiny behind the ills of this world."

"Mortem Delenda Est."

"25,000km is not orbit"-texanmarauder
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Elheru Aran »

Rhadamantus wrote:What would the possible rationale for that even be?
It's basically a box. A pretty efficient use of space for carrying starfighters around.

Not very attractive, mind. And since it's a frigate, not a carrier... not even that efficient.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Joun_Lord »

The Uglies. Sorry ass hybrid fighters that seem to exist solely because people are too lazy to come up with new designs. In universe seem to take all the worst elements of whatever ships they were off of. They certainly live up to the names too. One can appreciate the sleep design of the TIE Fighter and appreciate the stripped down workhorse look of the Y-Wing, few are going to appreciate a TIE cockpit with Y-Wing engines welded on or a Y-Wing cockpit with some TIE solar panels welded on.

Honorable mention, the U-Wing from Rogue One. It looks like an Ugly in that it looks like they robbed a bunch of design elements of existing designs.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Lord Revan »

at least with the U-wing the final design looks like all it's parts belong where they are even if the ship is ugly in the more traditional way, with the uglies not only are they ugly in the more traditional way (as in the asthetics suck in 9 cases out of 10) most of the time they look like kitbashes.

In my honest opinion (and you're free to disagree) a good kitbash is something that if you see it the first time and haven't see any other designs of that franchice you wouldn't recognize as a kitbash, for example the Miranda-class from star trek and to lesser extent the Nebula, sure if you've seen a Connie or a CGS before you recognize the kitbash pieces but the kitbash nature isn't obvious right of the gate, I belive the U-Wing belongs here as well as it's not obvious it's taking elements from other design unless you're familiar with those designs.

Most of the EU uglies on the other hand are obvious kitbashes right from the gate, you might not be able to tell where the parts come from but it's clear there's at least 2 totally different designed things that are lazily glued together, another good example of this would that Star Trek ship that used the saucer section and nacelles of on intrepid-class and combinied that with the main body of marquis raider as the engineering hell and nacelle pylons, it's blindingly obvious there where 1 design starts and the other begins.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Galvatron »

I always thought the K-wing from the Black Fleet Crisis sounded dumb, but I actually like this illustration of it since it seems to incorporate elements of the older Y-wing, ARC-170 and LAAT/i all in one design without looking overly kitbashed.

Image

I'm sure it would look even better with a little carbon scoring and rebel livery.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Ave Dominus Nox »

I always though the Republic Class Star Destroyer was a ugly looking design
Image

especially when compared with the Nebula Class Star Destroyer which came out at the same time
Image
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by The Romulan Republic »

Oh good God, the Republic class looks like a stoned turtle with a skin condition.

The K-wing, up above, looks very very close to being an aesthetically good design.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Q99 »

I personally feel the K-Wing is too busy with all the hardpoints and mini turrets. Simple it down a bit and you'd be in a good place.


As for the Uglies, I will defend them as being *in-universe* kitbashes. They literally are made from spare parts, after all.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Galvatron »

Q99 wrote:I personally feel the K-Wing is too busy with all the hardpoints and mini turrets. Simple it down a bit and you'd be in a good place.
That's pretty much the same way I feel about the ARC-170: too many cockpits and seemingly pointless S-foils. Simple it down a bit too and I'd like it a lot more.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by fractalsponge1 »

Endurance-class fleet carrier before I got to it:

Image
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Rhadamantus »

fractalsponge1 wrote:Endurance-class fleet carrier before I got to it:

Image
Wow. That is weird looking.
"There is no justice in the laws of nature, no term for fairness in the equations of motion. The Universe is neither evil, nor good, it simply does not care. The stars don't care, or the Sun, or the sky.

But they don't have to! WE care! There IS light in the world, and it is US!"

"There is no destiny behind the ills of this world."

"Mortem Delenda Est."

"25,000km is not orbit"-texanmarauder
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Q99 »

Some designs really feel like they came out of a different ship paradigm.

The Thrustships from the Black Fleet Crisis:
Image

Are basically ugly versions of Battletech's union-class dropships.

And their fighters? Just modern fighters with extra wings:
Image

It's like they were a precursor to the Vong, except instead of 'let's make their ships weird and different, real Jedi vs Aliens stuff,' it was 'let's make their designs as bland and boring as possible.'
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Ave Dominus Nox »

fractalsponge1 wrote:Endurance-class fleet carrier before I got to it:

Image
I think this is the actual image. I think what you have is the concept art

Image

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Enduranc ... s_EGTW.jpg

its still odd looking though
"My sons, the galaxy is burning. We all bear witness to a final truth -- our way is not the way of the Imperium. You have never stood in the Emperor’s light. Never worn the Imperial eagle. And you never will. You shall stand in midnight clad, your claws forever red with the lifeblood of my father’s failed empire, warring through the centuries as the talons of a murdered god. Rise, my sons, and take your wrath across the stars, in my name. In my memory. Rise, my Night Lords."

— The Primarch Konrad Curze, at the final gathering of the VIII Legion
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Imperial528 »

Fractal posted what was originally the only depiction of that ship class.

He's the artist who made the new model for the Essential Guide to Warfare.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Eternal_Freedom »

In fairness, many ships deserved mocking until Fractal got his hands on them.
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Q99 »

Of bad ships, there's different types of bad as well. Better weird-bad than boring-bad, IMO ^^
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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Galvatron »

How about this monstrosity from Empire's End #2?

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Re: Ship That Deserve Mocking

Post by Eternal_Freedom »

Compared to other fugly ships we've sen, that command ship isn't so bad, even if they did just put a (WW2 vintage) carrier IN SPAAACE! with some stuff on the underside.
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Baltar: "What are you babbling about other...it's impossible!"
Centurion: "No. It is a Battlestar."

Corrax Entry 7:17: So you walk eternally through the shadow realms, standing against evil where all others falter. May your thirst for retribution never quench, may the blood on your sword never dry, and may we never need you again.
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