Most improbable RPG die throw?

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Post by weemadando » 2005-07-11 03:18am

I just calculated the odds of my roll - you know what - it was precisely 1 million to one odds of getting those six tens. Terry Pratchett's laws of the universe are vindicated once more.

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Post by The Yosemite Bear » 2005-07-11 03:24am

character generation rolls on some RPGs can get funny with me

my first "Stormbringer" I rolled up a melibelnibone sorceress that could treat elric as her bitch.

in Arduin AD&D I rolled young giant/ogre
rolls on the Ogre race chart get's greater gaints
rolss on the greater giants gets
half balrog.......
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Post by Erik von Nein » 2005-07-11 06:39am

Okay, so me and my friends are playing an AD&D game with my character being a crazy hermit druid who lives in a cave, his best friend is a spider, he talks to stalagmites and thinks the trees are in a conspiracy to get him. The other characters are a fairly generic half-elf druid whose mother apparently took care of my character, a fighter with a horribly dex stat and a halfling druid (I think, he was the size of a ten year old boy).

So, the first thing that happens in this campaign is we're all thrown into a prison cell with no weapons or armor only burlap sacks for cloths. The first thing my character does when he wakes up is to pee on his sack to try and do the "bend the bars with wet cloth" trick. Well, the female druid (generic one) didn't take kindly to that, so she whacks my character on the head with a bed post and knocks me out.

The guards then come in (about six of them with short swords, clubs and a net). They start to attempt to escort us out when one of the guards starts getting eaten by some amorphous blob in another cell. This is when our characters decide to fight our way out. So, the fighter grapples the one guard in our cell while my character, being the brilliant man he is, decides to use his only weapon; the wet burlap sack. Hurling it at his head I score a natural 20, narrowly missing the fighter's head, and the sack then proceeds to whip around his head with enough force to make it impossible for the guard to rip off. The guard drops his club and the halfling picks it up. So, on the halfling's turn, after watching this poor guard struggle, decides that the best thing to do is a called critical to the crotch. He succeeds with a natural 20 and all you hear is a muffled "mruuuff!" as the guard's pelvis gets crushed and he pukes into the sack. Needless to say he died.

Later on, after we managed to get our equipment back we face off against this half-black dragon slave driver in the caves where our cell was. Of course, my crazy druid pissed him off by saying something bad about his mother. So, the fight begins and we kind of do mild damage to him while he starts using the slaves as human shields. The fighter, having no real dex, of course, notices that the ceiling (about 50 feet up) looks like it could collapse. Being that he has the only grappling hook/rope he thinks it's a wonderful idea to throw it up there and rip it down on the half dragon. He not only critically succeeds on getting it to stick on the one place he needs it to he also critically succeeds on pulling down the roof right on top of the half dragon, killing him instantly.

Now, this whole campaign was supposed to be serious but me and serious D&D campaigns just do not go together. :twisted:

Oh, and I got a ton of experience as I apparently role-played my character very well.


In another campaign that was supposed to be somewhat silly, especially given the fact that my character was Mike Tyson with fish hooks on the ends of his boxing gloves. So, me, a stupidly powerful fighter and a few other characters I can't remember (been years) end up facing off against a red dragon almost as the first encounter in the game. So, after kinda doing damage to him (most from the fighter) I notice that there's something off about the neck, like a couple scales are coming loose. So, I roll to see if I can hope up onto it's back. What happens? Success! So, after not only remaining on it's back for a few rounds but also ripping off more skin I go "Screw this. I'm ripping its spine out," the DM informs me that I have to roll a 20 to do it. I roll and BAM! A 20 and I walk away from the battle with a fresh red dragon spine as a trophy.

That whole fight made up for a later one where we fought a cleric Shaq who utterly handed us our asses for impersonating a king.

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Post by Ghost Rider » 2005-07-11 11:07am

20 and a 1.

Not a game I was in but one I DMed.

(2nd Ed D&D)

At the end of this arduous campaign, the party faces the real enemy, an ancient Red. Good pitched battle, and at the end...it's down to the Elven Ranger and his blessed bow vs Tijuana(I had no idea what to name the bugger).

So he nocks one last arrow, it flies true(20) and fells the beast, and as it's falling out of the sky, I ask him to roll to get out of the way of this very large falling object. He rolls a 1.

We'll just say Derrick laughed his entire drink from his nose thinking of the image of his proud Elf going from elation to tripping over a rock and a huge shadow before the crunch.
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Post by consequences » 2005-07-11 05:15pm

Battletech. I'm running a Black Lanner(C variant I think, the one with 6 ER medium lasers). Directly in front of me, I have a Daishi Widowmaker, and some Gladiator variant or another. What do I do? Naturally, charge forward with all guns blazing. The fire of two assault mechs fails to put me down, and I peg the Daishi with 4 Er mediums, ione of which hits the head. Next turn, run directly up to point-blank range. Once again, nearly four times my mass fails to put me down, and I blow the Daishi's head clean off. Third turn, i finally lose an arm, but not one that I cared about, and I peg the Gladiator with a laser shot to the head. Then I had to leave, which sucked.

Battletech again. Running a Masakari with four ER PPCs. Unload three of them to save on heat at range. Hit, hit, hit with a twelve on 2d6. 1st hit, arm, whoopee. 2nd hit, Center torso, possible crit(2 on 2d6), then I roll a 12 for number of crits, scoring three. Gyro, Engine, Gyro, rendering the mech into a helpless pile of metal that can barely do squat from now on. For shits and giggles I roll the third location, scoring a 12, blowing its head clean off as it falls.


Heroes Unlimited. Playing a martial artist type who lucked out into Gravitational control, facing a bastard metal monstrosity four levels higher than me(killer gm), who keeps scoring criticals(and laughing, bastard killer gm), despite the fact that he only gets one laser beam attack each round as I am holding him to the earth with my power. So far, my kevlar is gone, as is my left arm and my desire to continue messing about. So I jump down next to him, and announce "I'm going to attack him with my Withering Flesh Atemi. You are going to have to decide how its reduction of half the target's SDC interacts with the super power of Alter Physical Structure: Metal, but its not going to matter right now, because I'm going to fumble". I promptly roll a 1. I then roll on the fumble chart, and learn that I have bit off the tip of my tongue. I then pass out from shock, failing my endurance roll, when losing an arm didn't faze me. At this point the metal marauder gets up as I am no longer holding him down, and goes through the nearest wall. The building then falls on me. The coroner's report: 'Subject has sustained numerous contusions, abrasions and fractures as a direct result of the building falling on him. Subject has also been subjected to weapons grade lasers, resulting in second and third degree burns, and the complete removal of left arm. Tip of subject's tongue has been severed, in all likelihgood by his own teeth. Cause Of Death: Drowning.'
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Post by Nephtys » 2005-07-11 09:09pm

Another battletech adventure. Enemy clan star is against an isolated pair of mechs. They've got a Mad Cat Prime, Vulture C, Shadow Cat Prime, Uller A and I think a Daishi Prometheus. I've got a Fafnir, a pair of pathetic Jenners, and a Centurion. The rest of my force was WAY far away.

Turn one, both HGR fired into the Daishi blow it's head off, with massive overkill (25 point hits).
Turn two, one HGR headcaps the mad cat, next HGR blows off a vulture side torso with a TAC.
Turn 3. Both HGRs hit the Vulture, crush it's center torso. Gone.
Turn 4. My totally intact Fafnir with minor armor damage blows the living daylights out of a fleeing Shadow Cat, while the CN9 unloads into the Uller. Hideous victory. :P

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Post by Imperial Overlord » 2005-07-11 11:56pm

Battletech. Massive battle between PC mercs and Smoke Jaguar Assault Star. Heavy damage to several PC 'mechs, one omni down, one moderately damage, and heavy damage to a Summoner (Thor) that has been ripping up the PCs pretty good with its firepower and outmaneuvering them. A Warhawk (Masakari) has also been giving them serious trouble.

PC comes late to the battle with a high jacked Clan Warhammer II-C. He decides to open up on the completely undamaged Warhawk instead of finishing off the Summoner. The group leader (The Dude) looks at him.

The Dude:"What, are you crazy? The Warhawk is untouched. Finish off the Thor."

Player: "Well, I could get lucky and hit the cockpit with an ER PPC."

The Dude: "Are you crazy? Do you know how unlikely that is? It's armoured like a Battlemaster. Finish off that damn Thor and then we can gang up on the Warhawk."

Player: "I'm going to do it anyway."

The Dude: "If you do this and don't succeed, I will kill you if the Clan doesn't get to us first."

Player: "Okay." Not only hits with the ER PPC, but hits the cockpit. Warhawk crashes to the ground with a dead pilot.
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Post by Darth Lucifer » 2005-07-12 12:05am

weemadando wrote:For some reason in L5R I am forever just rolling 10s, just all the fucking time.
As a GM, a dick-swinging player better pray that my d10's don't decide to explode like firecrackers. One of my players was playing a wanked out Togashi Monk who trained in the Mirumoto dueling style. I know that would probably never happen in the storyline, but I allowed the character into the game just to let the rest of the players know how I like to handle people who minimax during character creation.

On the battle table, there's a dice result where you have a duel on the battlefield. The Scorpion Bushi should not have gotten the first strike, but somehow he did, rolling 5k3 for damage. Four dice came out 1, 1, 1, 3, but the fifth dice was a 10. 14 + an additional 3 re-rolls, then a nine for a grand total of 53 points by yours truly.

Meanwhile, the tattoed monk swordsman can only take 48 points of damage. Dragon boy decides to use his "Great Destiny" advantage to avoid death, reducing him to one hit point. "OMFG!! teh rulz sez I can't die!!!11one+shift11wun1oneshifteleven111!!

"Fine," I say. "You've got one hit point. You're lying on the ground bleeding at your enemy's feet. But the Scorpion Bushi decides to decapitate his enemy's corpse, careful not to touch unclean dead flesh."

He goes fucking ballistic and rips his character sheet in half. I calmly tell him to make a new character and this time make a more balanced character. :twisted:

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Post by weemadando » 2005-07-12 01:01am

Nothing I hate more than players who can't hack having their characters die...

In a game of Conspiracy X, a player who was a DEA field agent got *spattered* by a burst of M4 fire from a "mercenary". He was still alive, but due to his bad luck/judgement his body was still exposed to fire and noone was willing to risk dragging him back into cover - so he bleeds out, the rest of the cell finish the investigation, then plant evidence etc to make it look like he died (they dumped his body in the river IIRC) in an undercover deal gone bad. The guy was spitting chips the whole fucking time. Too fucking bad - come up with a better plan for infiltrating the enemy compound next time - no one else in your team even got a scratch, so it was obviously something YOU did as self-appointed team leader...


And, as for my character that took down the Ogre Bushi in one hit? Too bad there were two of them. And the second one turned me into samurai-ko paste. But hey, she was a death-seeker, it was to be expected.

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Post by The Yosemite Bear » 2005-07-12 02:11am

I remember a whole party of 12-15th level players getting ambushed and beaten by a party of 5th level bandits....

ok the party had a monk, two Rangers who specialized in the terriane, a wild elf. All of which had to roll a one not to spot the ambush well ahead....

first round the bandits roll 4 20s!!!
dropping half the party in their opening volley of nets and bolos....

in two rounds the bandits had captured the entire party.
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Post by Oni Koneko Damien » 2005-07-12 02:29am

Werewolf: The Apocolypse campaign. My character happened to be on a flight from Egypt to New York (minus one arm, that's a story in itself) where the rest of the pack was waiting.

While there, they ran into a pack of Spiral Dancers known an 'The Phreakers'. Basically, their MO is that they act like your pack's best friends, and then split you up and try to put each individual through an 'urban legend' setting. Seeing as how I was the only one in the pack with Sense Wyrm, and I was gone, it was rather easy for them to set up the rest of the back.

Morgan, a female Bone Gnawer Ragabash, gets invited on a 'date' by one of the Phreakers. Halfway through the date, another Phreaker, with a hook for a hand, starts scratching on the side of the car. Morgan takes a composure roll...and botches it. She decides to take a rage roll to take out her date who is suddenly trying to murder her...she botches that. She takes a third roll to try and pull herself out of the rage, and botches that, causing the DM to declare that she's gone into a Wyrm Rage.

By this time, the rest of the pack has figured out something's up, find the rather large Spiral Dancer with hooks outside the car, and our sniper starts trying to take him out. Seven shots later, and not a single success has been scored. At about this time, Morgan rips the car in half, slaughters both BSDs, and incapacitates half the pack before she's calmed down.

I arrive back in town the next day, wondering why the hell only two of the pack members are still able to walk.

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Post by Pablo Sanchez » 2005-07-12 03:44pm

Not really improbable as much as funny. I was playing a D&D campaign as a bard, and I had rolled pretty well, so I was able to throw an 18 into charisma. I was RPing him as a bit of a lech, so when a young nobleman's daughter came to ask us for help rescuing her poor kidnapped father, I tried to make a bluff roll to convince her that my character was a wonderful altruist and would do it for no cost because he found her story tragic. The GM said I needed an 8 or better (she was desperate and scared) to convince her, which really meant 4 with my modifier. I rolled a one.

The GM said, "You stare at her breasts, drooling, before mumbling something about being glad to help. She is greatly offended and will not speak to you again."
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Post by White Haven » 2005-07-12 04:35pm

Hehe, this should be fun...

First, there was the Cyberpunk game my room-mate was in. The party is being chased through the city streets by an AV (VTOL gunship-type-thing), running away in a truck. One character says he's going to snipe it. GM tells him he's off his rocker, but the guy insists. Rolls his D10. Ends up with a /fifty-two/ thanks to open-ended dice, and blows the pilot apart, from a moving truck, against a flying AV.

The next two are from games of Battletech I've been in. First, one of the players was running an Uziel in an official event game. Fires an SRM-6 at an undamaged Hellspawn...and scores not one...not two...but three crit-chances through center torso armor. Ends up with SIX critical hits there, destroying both the gyro AND the engine.

And the last happened to yours truly...was running a heavy lance, had a Marauder, a Crusader (Both the HGR-toting versions), an Avatar (F-vatiant, with an LB-20X), and some other heavy I can't recall right now. Anyway, my lance takes a grand total of three through-armor floating crits the entire game. Both heavy gauss rifles are struck, exploding violently. The Marauder survives due to CASE, but is gutted, the Crusader is destroyed outright. The Avatar takes the third crit, which is a through-armor crit to the head, which hit the cockpit. My last mech was simply headchopped by a gauss rifle.

Oh, and then there's Wink Baufield, out merc unit's star aerospace pilot. In total seriousnes, I don't think he's EVER rolled beneath a 12. Ever. He took out the Red Corsair's custom clantech Battlemaster in a Sparrowhark, solo, in two different engagements. He's gyro-TAC'd multiple Clan mechs on the battlefield. He slices through Clan aerospace assets like monofilament through butter. HE's REDICULOUS...and he's played by my roomie, who only ever rolls that well when rolling for Wink. His own mechwarrior rolls sub-par most of the time.
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Post by Eleas » 2005-07-14 07:37am

I recall this weird fantasy RPG session where a younger friend of ours, Martina, played a spoiled brat of a wood elf with the improbable name of Raya. She wasn't very skilled at, well, anything - she had a bit of magic and a sword she could hardly use. Then she starts tracking these Death Bringer soldiers (basically, they're elven commandoes), having nothing else to do. Of course, you don't sneak up on highly trained killers without a damn good reason.

The commandoes, understandably, don't enjoy the company and attempt to capture her... which is when Martina's truly bizarre winning streak begins. In a system based on a d20 (the lower you roll, the better), she doesn't roll above 4.

For twenty rolls or so. Every single roll is a "perfect" (1), a "special" (2) or a success (3 or 4). And a lot of those were to determine if there was a critical hit (and there was). The threee commando soldiers were completely decimated by this slip of a girl with no training and no plan, who just casually handed them their asses, in fact without even trying to. The rest of us had to wade in in order to save them...
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Post by irishmick79 » 2005-07-14 02:34pm

Probably the craziest string of dice rolling I've ever seen happened in a home brew D20 star wars campaign. We had set up a system where the lower the roll the better you do, with a "1" resulting in a spectacular success and a "20" being a spectacular failure.

We were trying to seize data being stored on the bridge computer of a Star Destroyer in a covert operation. We had to gain access to the Star Destroyer's computers, make the data acquisition, and leave. Part of our team was to help secure the bridge while he did his work, and the other part was to keep the shuttle ready for the inevitable emergency evac.

The plan began without a hitch. The dice were hot, the decision making was crisp, and we had managed to land our captured Imperial shuttle in the docking bay and had quickly secured the bridge without alerting the ship to our presence. As we set up our computer expert to do his dirty work, the mission was beginning to look like it was going to be a cake walk.

Then, things just started going wrong. Rolling a 20 on his initial slicing attempt, our expert (who had a slicing skill of 19) managed to lock the doors to the bridge and issued a call for troop reinforcements. Reports quickly began coming in that stormtroopers were on their way to the bridge, in at least company strength. With half of our team locked in the bridge and a strong detatchment of enemy troops on the way, our computer guy panicked and tried to depressurize the accessways the troops would use to approach the bridge.

Again, he rolled a "20". Instead of a limited depressurization of certain passageways, our computer expert depressurized the entire ship, asphyxiating most of the unfortunate crewmembers. The hangar bay repulsorlifts which had served as the docking mechanism for our shuttle, no longer restrained by a pressurized compartment, temporarily lost control of the shuttle and shoved it into a nearby wall, causing minor damage. The only thing that prevented the bridge team from getting killed was a seperate system of pressurization used to stabilize the bridge atmosphere.

Fully alerted to our presence, Imperial forces, what was left of them, mobilized in force to stop us. Desperately trying to stabilzie a situation spiraling out of control, one of our bridge team members yanked the computer guy out of the chair and jockeyed the console himself, despite his slicing skill of 6. He began to hack the system and download information, and miraculously rolled a "1". He had gained access to virtually the entire Imperial Network, promptly downloaded the data we needed, and repressurized certain passageways that the Bridge team would use as an escape route.

Our Bridge team had an easier time working their way back to the hangar bay, thanks to the disarray of Imperial forces. There were several firefights with isolated imperial units, but the bridge team managed to make it back into the hangar bay relatively unscathed.

At that point, imperial troops hit us, and hit us hard. Our guys had to fight off the company that had been trying to find us before they could board the escape shuttle, and during the firefight one of our guys rolls a "20" when dicharging his weapon at a Stormtrooper. The weapon explodes and blows off his hand, causing him to pass out and nearly bleed to death. Our medic worked his way over to him, and promptly rolled a "20" in his effort to treat the arm injury. While slapping on the medpack, the medic slipped and sliced open an artery in the arm, forcing the wounded guy to make a damn near heroic strength check. He rolls a "1", and gets lucky with a miraculous blood clot that stops the bleeding.

After that, we somehow managed to pull our party together and get out of there. That night was just the craziest night of dice rolling I have ever seen. EVERYBODY was either rolling 20's or rolling 1's at key points in the plot. That's just unheard of, and it really made for a weird operation.
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Post by Rogue 9 » 2005-07-15 12:50am

My brother was DMing. He wanted my character to die. He therefore separated my character from the group through a Plot Device™ and eventually landed me in some underground pit surrounded by drow who would make me fight progressively tougher monsters until I died.

He planned for me to kick the bucket at the juvenile blue dragon, having been progressively weakened by the preceding umber hulk and land shark (bulette). However, when the bulette charged me upon being released into the pit, it rolled two natural 1s in a row. Upon consulting his evil critical miss chart, my brother decided that it had tripped and slid past me. I therefore incurred an attack of opportunity against it. Two twenties and a nineteen later, I had scored an instant kill on the thing that was supposed to chew me up and spit me out. :D
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Post by Edi » 2005-07-15 03:51am

Star Frontiers, character creation, we go with what you roll on d100 is your ability scores instead of using the chart in the game. I roll 95 for Strength/Stamina, 00 for Dexterity/Reaction Speed, 72 for Intuition/Logic and 89 for Personality/Leadership, then add five to Int/Log for the human modifier (+5 to any one stat of player's choice).

I can't even remember all the crazy die rolls I got in that campaign, there were so many, but a typical one was when my character had his fighter shot out from under him and had to make a Reaction Speed check with a -90 (yes, you read it right, -90) modifier to get out in time. I rolled 03 and the character survived.

Another time, flying a bomber and facing one of the most skilled enemy aces in the whole theater, who is flying a heavy fighter, I make a shot at extreme range and hit him right on the nose despite a ridiculous -50 or thereabouts modifier (to a skill that was around 55 or 60). He's obviously pissed off and takes me as a target, then misses all of his shots and I manage to turn after him enough to fire off a missile at him, which hits, blows his ship's structural integrity to hell, and he fails his RS check (against RS 90) to the tune of 97 or something when he had a -30 modifier to begin with. My character gets another instant boost in reputation. That is, on top of everything else he and the others got from that escapade, since it was a rogue, unsanctioned operation born out of sheer desperation and insanity that worked out beyond all expectations and resulted in the loss of two enemy carriers with full fighter complements, three cruisers, three destroyers and a supply depot plus some twenty-odd other fighters vs. less than ten fighters on our side.

Dragonquest solo campaign I was GMing, my friend Niina's character Miriel didn't acknowledge the concept of impossible. Very early on when she was still a complete neophyte (equivalent to around lv 2 in D&D or something like that) and faced with a chimaera (a really serious grade A nightmare in DQ, much worse than in D&D) due to me not reading the stats of the critter all that closely before randomly picking it as the monster in the woods, she casts a fear spell and succeeds in freezing the thing in panic for a moment and giving it a +20 modifier (penalty) on fear rolls for the rest of the day. The party's fighters don't even manage to dent the critter through its tough hide and it shakes off the spell and is right about to maul them beyond recognition when Miriel hits it with a second fear spell. Failed resistance roll, 96 on the fear chart, +20 modifier, whoops, chimaera collapses of a heart attack and expires, and she gets a completely unmarked chimaera pelt in the bargain. A white one too, as the first fear roll also turned the critter's fur white from shock.

Same DQ campaign, planned encounter where Miriel's party was supposed to be taken prisoner by a dragon (in DQ dragons are ~25 to 30 foot critters) who wanted to blackmail them into helping it out by killing a sorcerer that held it in thrall by its true name, things went anything but according to script. Dragon attacks the party from ambush and tries to get the horses to panic and throw the party. Miriel is the only one who does get unhorsed, and only because the dragon knocked the horse over. The rest of the party flees. On foot, Miriel decides to go on the offensive instead of running, figuring she has no chance anyway. Dragon wins initiative and attacks, only to have her parry and riposte the first claw attack with the result of a critical hit that cripples the front limb. The rest of its attacks miss (I'm not believing my eyes or my dice at this point). On her own turn, she scores another critical hit that maims the drake so badly that it's going to take nearly four months to recover from the single blow and effectively forces the dragon to surrender, especially when the planned plot devices came to play but in reverse of what was originally intended.
The dragon was supposed to be a reluctant ally and to boss them around, but instead it effectively ended up as Miriel's servant and offered her a dragon bonding on its own initiative. Worked out great for the plot, but it was certainly unexpected. After the dragon incident, there was no chance of anybody convincing any of the NPCs that there was something she couldn't do.

Another DQ incident, again with Miriel saving the party's bacon: the group gets ambushed by a hobgoblin (nasty, dangerous critter in DQ, generally superior to a highly trained soldier) raiding party in the middle of the night. Coming out of sleep, no armor on and everything going straight to hell, it looks like they are doomed (the dragon was off on an errand of its own). So Miriel grabs her sword and dagger, ripostes the first hobgoblin to come at her and kills it with a direct critical hit. On her turn she scores a critical hit and stabs one hobgoblin through the eye and then lops the head off a second one. With the rest of the party struggling for its life and being cut to pieces, five hobgoblins decide to gang up on her. Big mistake, knowing she can't fight them all at once, she drops her weapons and casts a spell of black flames at them in another desperate move and again succeeds with a critical roll despite the minuscule chances of it happening. Double effect spell kills one hobgoblin, maims a second one to the point of uselessness, paralyzes a third and sends the remaining two running for their lives. She then picks up her weapons and kills two more of the creatures and the rest decide they've had more than enough of the crazy woman and her just as crazy warhorse that had already brained one hobgoblin to death on its own and was looking to do more.

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Post by Master Arachnos » 2005-07-19 11:59am

Games Workshop Newcastle.

Warhammer Fanasty Battle (2ed I think), demonstration game with my orcs & goblins against elves.

OK then, my turn and it's orc & goblin animosity test time. 12 rolls later (and twelve one's in a row, not with the same die, so that was'nt the reason) and my army have forgotten that they have an enemy to fight and are slugging it out amongst themselves...

staff workers said it was the most awesomely crappy display of dice rolling they'd ever seen in years....

Is'nt it amazing how it's always the bad things you remember.....

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Post by Civil War Man » 2005-07-19 12:28pm

D&D 3E. Our party was participating in a fighting contest. Naturally, my character being a fighter, I decided to participate.

My character was a human wielding a two-bladed sword (he had also been possessed by a demon, but that's another story entirely). The crowd also hated him, though I can't remember why (I think he did something really cheap in his first battle of the tournament).

Unfortunately, my character didn't win (something which greatly pleased the crowd), but he was squaring off in the loser bracket and fighting for third place. His match was against a mid-level monk (so not uberwank, but still pretty wankish).

The fight was getting down to the wire. I only had around 3 hitpoints left. The monk was also badly hurt, but was still doing better off than me. Most likely my next attack would be my last.

So I attack with my sword. Critical hit. I roll damage. About as massive damage as you can get (WAY more than 50 damage done in 1 attack). Brought him down to about -30 hitpoints.

A description of how it was seen in-universe:

As the monk closes in to finish you off, you draw upon the last reserves of strength. With a loud bellow, you strike as him with everything you have left. When the dust clears, you are standing there covered in blood, with pieces of what used to be the monk scattered around you. As clerics rush the arena, you pass out, no longer having the energy to even remain conscious. For several moments, the arena is silent, but then the crowd erupts into deafening applause.

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Post by Hotfoot » 2005-07-19 05:22pm

A game of Heavy Gear I was running, specifically the now famous Black Pigs campaign. The way Heavy Gear works, the higher your skill, the more dice you roll. It gets much more difficult to fumble the higher skilled you are, as you have to roll ALL ones in order to fumble. Meanwhile, crits get easier, because you have a better chance of rolling multiple high numbers with more dice, and it's not all or nothing like fumbles are.

So, anyway, the Black Pigs had just cleared out the control room of the Arcology's Nuclear Reactor of terrorists. Just as they're assessing the situation, six civilian Gears come through an airlock, carrying barrels of radioactive materials. Now, Gears, if you're unfamiliar with the system, are relatively small walking mecha that bridge the line between LAV and Infantry. Civilian models are usually open, similar to the powerloader Ripley uses in Aliens, but in this case, these Gears were heavily shielded to allow crews to work with large amounts of radioactive materials. This same shielding, of course, made them highly resistant to small arms, which is what the vast majority of the Black Pigs carried.

In possession of a precious few weapons capable of penetrating the Gears, the Pigs desperately racked their brains for ways to handle the Tangos in the suits. When the Gears noticed the lack of activity in the Control Room, they attempted to check in and see what was going on.

Me: They're asking for a response? What do you do?
Marcao: I'm going to try and bluff my way out of the situation. Burning an emergency die so I roll three. I get on the radio and say, "Uh, yeah, we've got a bit of a technical problem up here. We need some help, mind coming up?"
Me: Okay, roll it.
*We both roll at the same time, he rolls three sixes, I roll two ones. End result, a Margin of Success of 9, which in Heavy Gear is insane.*
Me: ...you've got to be fucking kidding me.
Everyone else at the table: Woo-hoo! Kickass!

I take a short walk upstairs, to try and figure out what the hell the result is going to be. Finally, I come back down, and what results isn't even combat, it's a bloodbath. The pilots come up, having left their Gears behind, and get mowed down by a squad support weapon. The remaining guards outside were taken by surprise and rushed in, once again getting mowed down. The last guards tried to prepare before rushing in, but were mowed down by another player from a different angle.

Now, of course, this same player who got a full crit on three dice has also, in the same game, had numerous fumbles with three dice, including one where he had a chance of taking down the primary antagonist partway through the game.
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Post by loomer » 2007-03-28 01:54pm

The exact details I can't remember, but I do recall that in one game of my homebrew SciFi RPG, the party had been imprisoned by the military for gunrunning and were currenlty being held on a Dreadnaught orbiting Earth. Through a series of miraculous rolls, they overpowered and murdered the guards, snuck into the maintenance elevator, and boarded the bridge.

And then they fired the nuclear missiles on Earth. And targeted nuclear reactors to spread more radiatioactive fallout. I think they may also have set the ship to crash into Antarctica at vast speeds to melt the ice cap, but I'm not sure of that. A whole metric fuckton of lucky rolls, and six men have just pretty much rendered a planet uninhabitable.
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Post by Keevan_Colton » 2007-03-28 02:19pm

This thread is over 2 years old, but I suppose some more improbable die rolls have happened.

This thread just passed a save at -10 vs. locking.
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Post by SirNitram » 2007-03-28 02:21pm

I played paladins in 2nd ed. This meant I quickly had to develop the ability to throw 3 sixs out of every 4 d6's I had when I needed it. Anyway, one Spelljammer game, it became silly. I had been thrown overboard, and needed to propel myself back to the ship, while a Nautiloid bore down on me.

I raised the Arquebus. Being in the void with only my own air pocket, I used Burning Hands to ignite the powder.

I hit without a problem. It's too big to miss.

I started rolling 6's. It kept coming up, I kept rolling. The open-ended nature of 2nd ed D&D firearms meant that when I stopped rolling, I had fired through the frontal armour, three rooms, and directly into the Elder Brain controlling the ship.
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Post by Faram » 2007-03-28 03:02pm

Holy evil Jesus, Die zombie DIE!
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