StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Riker: Tell Worf and Crusher to get their fucking guns out and start shooting, as you no longer have a gun and are wearing what looks like a woman's bathing suit (they do that in Harry Potter, not Star Trek, but whatever).

Ricker: Phone the Enterprise and have them transport the attackers heads up their asses.

O'Brien: Now that you have a preposterous amount of weed for general fun-times, target Japan with the transporter, beam up authentic 20th-century bonsai tree as gift for Keiko.

Riker: Order away team to stun the opposition and seize examples of their projectile weapons as insurance for the next time we encounter The Borg.

Picard: Order Data back his to post at sensors to figure out what the hell that badly-cloaked Bird of prey was doing.

Geordi: Ruminate on the time I met Captain Montgomery Scott and wonder what the sly old dog would have to say about wanton random time travel and the notion of a Temporal Prime Directive.

You're all a bunch of idiots.

CHIEF O'BRIEN: Quickly stash HELLA NUGS in locker of CHIEF ENGINEER GEORDI LA FORGE.

Picard: Order Chief O'brien to beam up the away team and then to make him give you all your weed.

Once the away team is on board, have some fun with the weed and Crusher.

After that, go back to the 24th century.

I'm pretty sure he's not doing them anymore.

Because of you.

Zablorg wrote:You're all a bunch of idiots.

CHIEF O'BRIEN: Quickly stash HELLA NUGS in locker of CHIEF ENGINEER GEORDI LA FORGE.

Dude, he's blind, not lacking in a sense of smell...

Yeah, and he can use his visor to analyse the stuff for thc and skim off the best for himself.

I think we're doing this all wrong. O'BRIEN, replace the REPLICATOR FEEDSTOCK with HELLA NUGS.

Screw hash cakes, let's have hash everything.

Vanas wrote:I think we're doing this all wrong. O'BRIEN, replace the REPLICATOR FEEDSTOCK with HELLA NUGS.

Screw hash cakes, let's have hash everything.

A: That plan won't work, since the replicator would utterly destroy the marijuana in the process of replicating things.

B: If it did work, we're dead after the captain has come down off his fifth cup of Tea, Hash Grey, Hot, and it hits him that he spent the night in the holodeck, macking on Photonic Professor James Moriarty and Photonic Doctor Leah Brahms at the same time.

But, B would be pretty funny, though.

This is great.

< Beam ANGRY ADMIRAL on board and put him into quarantine >

I'm not sure what's funnier; unfunny people ruining an interesting idea, or unfunny people not noticing they ruined it.

Nobody's painting anything anymore!

If you really insist I'll spill the beans and tell you all exactly why.

But I can appreciate if you want to solve the puzzle on your own.

You beam back the away team. You're not even sure why then insisted on going, you could have easily beamed the SUPPLY OF ILLICIT SHOULDERPADS right away without bothering with an away team.


You are now Captain Picard.

You order the enterprise to return to the 24th century before you create any other time paradoxes.





You return to THE NEUTRAL ZONE and transport the SUPPLY OF ILLICIT SHOULDERPADS to the Romulan ship. Perhaps this is the beginning of a new era of peace between the Romulans and the Federation. The end of THE NEUTRAL ZONE?


You consider the possibility. In any event, you order the Enterprise to the nearest system to put the ship in orbit for some R&R involving that PREPOSTEROUS AMOUNT OF WEED.


Let's see what's out there.

ANGRY ADMIRAL: Punch your way into the ship through the hull using your MIGHTY FISTS OF RAGE!

The Angry Admiral doesn't have arms. He will have to headbutt his way through the hull with his MIGHTY FOREHEAD OF RAGE. No, his MIGHTY FOREHEAD OF TOS RAGE!

His forehead will deform and grow ridges from this. Afterwards, he travels back into Quo'nos in the past and Angry Admiral becomes the progenitor of the Klingon race!!!!!!

No no, first things first, ANGRY ADMIRAL retreive ARMS.

You guys are dumb. Look - we need to get ANGRY ADMIRAL into the ship and get him unangry by offering him HELLA NUGS

Once ANGRY ADMIRAL headbutts his way into the ship, we can offer him HELLA NUGS.

How is he breathing out there, anyway?

For no reason, have Data bang against a wall, repeatedly.

Mayabird wrote:Once ANGRY ADMIRAL headbutts his way into the ship, we can offer him HELLA NUGS.

How is he breathing out there, anyway?

He probably ripped his shirt a little to make sure he wouldnt need to.