StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Eternal_Freedom wrote:"Really? Oh well, someone else's problem..."

"On the contrary, Director", a man said upon walking in. He had the most outrageous moustache, and also a huge and prominent badge on his belt, "It is very much your problem, as I have just decided to make it such."

"And you are?", von Braun was not intimidated. Thanasian secret police had vastly more impressive badges than this...FBI.

"Dick Fisher of the FBI. My men reported that the Zenobian, uh, Ivanich or whatever his last name was, escape your facility last night. I wonder who might've tipped him off, hmm?"

Johnny glanced at Sam, but instantly took the side of his employee, "I have no idea, Mr. Fisher. Perhaps you have a leak at your organization?"

"Why yes of course! And one of my men used some sort of secret hand-held telephone that does not use land lines to call Drago and warn him they were coming!"

"Perhaps. You never know, with those Zenobians. They are really crafty."

"Oh, shove it. I told your man Francisco here that we'd both lose our jobs if he tried any funny stuff. Well then, I am about to lose mine, so he better watch his step.", Fisher extracted a piece of paper from his pocket, "Here's a search warrant for the premises of this fine facility. You can now stand aside and not touch the evidence while my men secure it. I have also taken the liberty of waking up your personnell so that they can be interviewed by my people."

Fisher's smug grin just begged for a snide and accurate response from von Braun...

FaxModem1 wrote:I'm missing a joke here.

Korolev had his first heart attack in 1960.

EDIT: And on another note...man, no volunteers for the glorious and most manly Murcan Astronaut Corps?

It's almost like people here are in love with Soviet Russia Zenobia!

Hey, my guy was a volunteer, but life got in the way. Murca changes its tune, and they'll get another volunteer.

Sergei Pavlovich Korolev historically had a heart attack in December 1960.

The other jokes in that post were:
1) The origins of a popular Russian joke about Ukrainians, bastardized into this setting, and...
2) Evidence that in 1939 there was a (very lost) Bragulan wandering around the wastes of Zyberia hitting gulag inmates with a large stick.

FaxModem1 wrote:Hey, my guy was a volunteer, but life got in the way. Murca changes its tune, and they'll get another volunteer.

Or one of his numerous brothers could volunteer

PeZook wrote:It's almost like people here are in love with Soviet Russia Zenobia!

Clearly they are all of sound patriotic mind, trying to become new Zenobian mangs! Who will help spread our Commienist Republic to the whole world! And really who wouldn't, it's much more fun and less crazy then filithy capitalist Murica, where they sell thier own mothers for drinking money, and anyone is allowed to shoot people who disagree!

While everyone knows it's only the NKVDVDROM who are allowed to shoot people who have non-patriotic ideas.

Fox Modem entered the base. He examined the map he was looking at, apparently he had a meeting with a Mr. Von Braun.

Eventually he found the office, and inside were three men, two were wearing lab coats, the other was sporting a fedora and a badge.

"Fox Modem, reporting for duty sir." decried the young man.

Sam keeps an innocent expression while the man from the FBI rants
"Idiot man lost his state pension. Ha!" he thinks to himself.
He looks up as a man walks in. "Chiselled jaw, manly muscles, he looked exactly like.... Oh, he's Fox modem... I guess this is one of those infamous brothers we heard was so much fun on cold night." Sam thinks, chuckling
"Welcome to the project Fox. I hope you're as good as your brother?"

Fox paled at that comment. 'Good as my brother?' Did they know? Better to play it off as nothing.

"Sir, Fax is the amateur in the family. I'm who you go to if you want it done right."

FaxModem1 wrote:"Sir, Fax is the amateur in the family. I'm who you go to if you want it done right."

"Well, the enthusiasm and confidence is certainly there. We're just going to have to see how you... manage amongst the other astronauts, aren't we..." Sam says, grinning evily.

"Now, first me and my men are goin' to have a little chat with mr.Fox Modem.", Dick Fisher said, "You two gentlemen can follow me, while my people go through your papers here. Thank you for your cooperation."

Outside, dozens of FBI vehicles were parked in fron of the brand-new Administration building. Paramedics were loading the mummified body of the gate security guard onto an ambulance, while FBI specialists were loading boxes full of papers into vans.

"So, Mr. 'Fox' Modem, what is your relationship with your,hmm,'brother'?"

Fox looked at the FBI agent like he was an idiot. "He's my brother. You just answered your own question."

PeZook wrote: "You two gentlemen can follow me, while my people go through your papers here. Thank you for your cooperation."

"You realise only a very small percentage of your men will be able to understand much of my, or any other scientists, drawings yes? But if you want to get confused by parabolic wave equations and re-entry burn calculations, be my guest. It's not very interesting though." Sam says, sighing at the entire situation.

FaxModem1 wrote:Spoiler

What happened to the security guard and why is he mummified?

Spoiler

barnest2 wrote:

FaxModem1 wrote:Spoiler

What happened to the security guard and why is he mummified?

Spoiler

He was mentioned as possibly dead on the first page. It might be that he was in fact dead, and no one noticed him for the last four years

Spoiler

"He'll pull through," the news slowly spread throughout the entire Cosmodrome, and finally into the cold machine shop. Grzegorz sighed as he heard the news he had been hoping for, ever since the Comrade Chief Designer broke down.

"Great man, strong as bull," he thought as he took another big iron piece and hauled it over to the loading area.

"Unlike poor Grandpa Krzysztof. What a pity," the though hit him as he laid it onto the neat pile of finished parts, waiting for the truck to come by on it's next round.

He took a deep breath to clense the memories from his mind. He could still see it - he had just come back from school when he had noticed his grandpa acting weird. At least he had had a long, fruitful life - had had lived to a ripe age of thirty-eight when it had happened...

FaxModem1 wrote:Fox looked at the FBI agent like he was an idiot. "He's my brother. You just answered your own question."

"You're lucky Edgar Vacuum is busy with other things, smartass. I was asking about your relationship. Are you two close?"

The question seemed...pointed somehow.

"Sir, I really don't know what you mean. Of course we're close. We're brothers."
Spoiler

You can make any country look like cheese eating surrender monkeys if you selectively quote only its defeats.

Anyways...

----------------------------



Vladimir Lennon State Hospital
Moosecow, Zenobia

Stanislav Shroomanski entered the private room where one of the greatest men in Zenobia was recuperating after his episode. The room was spacious and well-lit, with a magnificent view of the city - no expense would be spared on saving Syrgy Pavyllyvych, Chief Designer of Zenobia's space program! That was the Premier's wish and directive, and nobody - not even his sworn enemies in the Politburo - dared oppose it.

"Comrade! How are you today?", the Premier beamed. The patient did not look too bad, actually.

"A bit under the weather, comrade premier.", Syrgy replied with his usual reserve, "I cannot wait to get back to work, there's so much to do this season."

"Ah, comrade, do not worry. Your assistant has everything well in hand, and the doctors said you needed rest. They give me daily reports on your condition, da."

"I am flattered, comrade, but it is not necessary"

"On the contrary!", Shroomanski exclaimed, gesticulating wildly, "It is completely necessary! Your work, comrade, has given Zenobia prestige and standing in the world! We have proven to all that a commienist nation is capable of outdoing even the largest dens of capitalist depravity!"

"Surely you use hyperbole, comrade. I was merely doing my job..."

"Da! And it was a fine job! Anyways, I am here for another matter. You should take a vacation, comrade. I have ordered the Foreign Ministry to issue you a passport, da. You are going to attend the International Air Show in Baris this spring!"

Syrgy's eyes went wide with surprise, and a bit of shock, "But my work..."

"Your work will wait. The manned launch has been cancelled, regrettably. Your team will use that time to restore the rockets to their former glory, da, and you will recuperate. And bring us information on what the Murcans are up to."

"So I am to be a spy?"

"No, no, merely a representative of the people. Comissar Omeganski will handle that part, da. He has volunteered, and though the NKVDVDROM was wary to let him go due to the recent streak of sabotage and desertions from the space program, I overruled them. The comissar can redeem himself by stealing us some Murcan rocket technolgy for us to study, da. While inferior product of the opressed masses, perhaps it can still tell thing to your team. Like what not to do, ha?"

Shroomanski laughed heartily and patted Syrgy on the shoulder, "It will be great fun, you will see! You should go, da? Or else! Haha!"

FaxModem1 wrote:"Sir, I really don't know what you mean. Of course we're close. We're brothers."

"How close, exactly? Do you know where your brother is now?"