Anyone Want a Good Laugh?

[Darth Wong]

Oooooh. Darkstar can spout ominously threatening tough-guy rhetoric on the Internet. I'm sooo scared now.

[Elfdart]

What I meant was that he's so hopelessly obsessed with the debate he puts it in front of everything else in his life (at least that's the impression I've gathered). Sort of like captain Ahab or something.

Nah, he's more of a Mopey Dick.

[Elfdart]

The thing with RSA is, he feels he was "challenged", by a slap in the face with a white glove. He's said before that "we've" come to know he won't back down, and that he can be an stubborn SOB about it, to our chagrin.

It's that absurd sense of his own importance which makes him so comical. He's like Ted Knight's character in Caddyshack.

You'll get nothing and like it!

Seriously, Dorkstar is more like the Bill Murray character, only Carl Spackler is deranged from smoking too much weed, but I'm sure both jack off to old grannies on golf courses and have unhealthy obsessions with rodents. I can just picture Scooter practically holding some poor kid hostage with a pitchfork and making him listen to some incoherent bullshit:

And I say, "Hey Data, how about a little something, you know, for the effort?

But when he dies, on his death bed, he will receive total consciousness. So he has that going for him. What an asshole.

[Dooey Jo]

What math, anyways? Is he expecting us to magically calculate the aproximate physical attractiveness, metal capability and social skills and average them out or something, over the internet?

That'll never work. He is incapable of being metal.

Obviously, we must take a few select quotes, such as:
"I have [...] exploded with [...] the liberated energy of a small artificial sun [...] in [...] a huge, gaping vagina."

Next, we conclude that Darkstar has fusion-powered balls, and for the sake of the argument we assume that this represents the natural state of Darkstareans. Then, based on an unspecified chain-reaction theory producing invisible bands of brightness, we estimate that the output of Darkstar's reactors is ~28 GW. Assuming Darkstar is 100 years old, this works out to be about one ton of semen. A fair estimate is that Darkstar deposits about one hectogram of semen in every vagina he visits, and assuming he became sexually active at age ten, and is not a wanker, he must have about one hundred different women per year.

Truly, maths shows him to be the king of getting laid often!

[Darth Servo]

What math, anyways? Is he expecting us to magically calculate the aproximate physical attractiveness, metal capability and social skills and average them out or something, over the internet?

That'll never work. He is incapable of being metal.

Obviously, we must take a few select quotes, such as:
"I have [...] exploded with [...] the liberated energy of a small artificial sun [...] in [...] a huge, gaping vagina."

Next, we conclude that Darkstar has fusion-powered balls, and for the sake of the argument we assume that this represents the natural state of Darkstareans. Then, based on an unspecified chain-reaction theory producing invisible bands of brightness, we estimate that the output of Darkstar's reactors is ~28 GW. Assuming Darkstar is 100 years old, this works out to be about one ton of semen. A fair estimate is that Darkstar deposits about one hectogram of semen in every vagina he visits, and assuming he became sexually active at age ten, and is not a wanker, he must have about one hundred different women per year.

Truly, maths shows him to be the king of getting laid often!

"Do the math" is just another one of Scooter's phrases he stole from "the evil warsies" and has turned into a cliche. If you "do the math" you'll see ALL of his conclusions make sense (without presenting any actual math though).

Of course, Scooter won't be posting any names or pictures of the women he's supposedly scored with. That would "endanger" their safety, exposing them to the dreaded warsie jihad.

[Master of Ossus]

What math, anyways? Is he expecting us to magically calculate the aproximate physical attractiveness, metal capability and social skills and average them out or something, over the internet?

That'll never work. He is incapable of being metal.

Why not? This is a guy who seriously argued that humans in the SW universe have spinal columns composed largely of metal. No one could seriously advance this claim unless their cranium was made of an inordinately dense substance, and metal would seem to fit the bill.

[Thanatos]

Man, he really likes to spam his own comments section.

[Darth Servo]

Man, he really likes to spam his own comments section.

Its how he manages to sleep through the night.

[Darth Servo]

If you do that math, you ought to come to the correct conclusion that I'm doing just fine in the getting laid department, but I do thank you for your concern.

Sorry Darktard, but the half-dozen idiots at StarfleetJedi metaphorically sucking your dick doesn't constitute "getting laid".

[harbringer]

You have to say one thing for darkstar he is a bust a gut comedian... the best part is he plays the "straight guy" so well you would think he had no idea he was such a gifted comedian. The bit where he boasts about getting girls is priceless I swear I nearly pissed myself. I mean how does some guy who has never been out of his basement for any reason other than work going to pull a girl? maybe a young woman sits in the same room as him at work and he counts work hours as time spent with a woman?. Well I just had my hysterical laughing fit of the week thanks darkstar your a true entertainer never let the spotlight drift hey ohh by the way say hi to mum.

[Vympel]

I take a dim view of such pointless necromancy.