Anyone Want a Good Laugh?
Moderator: Vympel
- Darth Wong
- Sith Lord
- Posts: 70028
- Joined: 2002-07-03 12:25am
- Location: Toronto, Canada
- Contact:
Oooooh. Darkstar can spout ominously threatening tough-guy rhetoric on the Internet. I'm sooo scared now.
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
Darth Wong wrote:It's that absurd sense of his own importance which makes him so comical. He's like Ted Knight's character in Caddyshack.Lord Poe wrote:The thing with RSA is, he feels he was "challenged", by a slap in the face with a white glove. He's said before that "we've" come to know he won't back down, and that he can be an stubborn SOB about it, to our chagrin.
You'll get nothing and like it!
Seriously, Dorkstar is more like the Bill Murray character, only Carl Spackler is deranged from smoking too much weed, but I'm sure both jack off to old grannies on golf courses and have unhealthy obsessions with rodents. I can just picture Scooter practically holding some poor kid hostage with a pitchfork and making him listen to some incoherent bullshit:
But when he dies, on his death bed, he will receive total consciousness. So he has that going for him. What an asshole.And I say, "Hey Data, how about a little something, you know, for the effort?
- Dooey Jo
- Sith Devotee
- Posts: 3127
- Joined: 2002-08-09 01:09pm
- Location: The land beyond the forest; Sweden.
- Contact:
That'll never work. He is incapable of being metal.Zablorg wrote:What math, anyways? Is he expecting us to magically calculate the aproximate physical attractiveness, metal capability and social skills and average them out or something, over the internet?
Obviously, we must take a few select quotes, such as:
"I have [...] exploded with [...] the liberated energy of a small artificial sun [...] in [...] a huge, gaping vagina."
Next, we conclude that Darkstar has fusion-powered balls, and for the sake of the argument we assume that this represents the natural state of Darkstareans. Then, based on an unspecified chain-reaction theory producing invisible bands of brightness, we estimate that the output of Darkstar's reactors is ~28 GW. Assuming Darkstar is 100 years old, this works out to be about one ton of semen. A fair estimate is that Darkstar deposits about one hectogram of semen in every vagina he visits, and assuming he became sexually active at age ten, and is not a wanker, he must have about one hundred different women per year.
Truly, maths shows him to be the king of getting laid often!
"Nippon ichi, bitches! Boing-boing."
Mai smote the demonic fires of heck...
Faker Ninjas invented ninjitsu
Mai smote the demonic fires of heck...
Faker Ninjas invented ninjitsu
- Darth Servo
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 8805
- Joined: 2002-10-10 06:12pm
- Location: Satellite of Love
"Do the math" is just another one of Scooter's phrases he stole from "the evil warsies" and has turned into a cliche. If you "do the math" you'll see ALL of his conclusions make sense (without presenting any actual math though).Dooey Jo wrote:That'll never work. He is incapable of being metal.Zablorg wrote:What math, anyways? Is he expecting us to magically calculate the aproximate physical attractiveness, metal capability and social skills and average them out or something, over the internet?
Obviously, we must take a few select quotes, such as:
"I have [...] exploded with [...] the liberated energy of a small artificial sun [...] in [...] a huge, gaping vagina."
Next, we conclude that Darkstar has fusion-powered balls, and for the sake of the argument we assume that this represents the natural state of Darkstareans. Then, based on an unspecified chain-reaction theory producing invisible bands of brightness, we estimate that the output of Darkstar's reactors is ~28 GW. Assuming Darkstar is 100 years old, this works out to be about one ton of semen. A fair estimate is that Darkstar deposits about one hectogram of semen in every vagina he visits, and assuming he became sexually active at age ten, and is not a wanker, he must have about one hundred different women per year.
Truly, maths shows him to be the king of getting laid often!
Of course, Scooter won't be posting any names or pictures of the women he's supposedly scored with. That would "endanger" their safety, exposing them to the dreaded warsie jihad.
"everytime a person is born the Earth weighs just a little more."--DMJ on StarTrek.com
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com
"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com
"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
- Master of Ossus
- Darkest Knight
- Posts: 18213
- Joined: 2002-07-11 01:35am
- Location: California
Why not? This is a guy who seriously argued that humans in the SW universe have spinal columns composed largely of metal. No one could seriously advance this claim unless their cranium was made of an inordinately dense substance, and metal would seem to fit the bill.Dooey Jo wrote:That'll never work. He is incapable of being metal.Zablorg wrote:What math, anyways? Is he expecting us to magically calculate the aproximate physical attractiveness, metal capability and social skills and average them out or something, over the internet?
"Sometimes I think you WANT us to fail." "Shut up, just shut up!" -Two Guys from Kabul
Latinum Star Recipient; Hacker's Cross Award Winner
"one soler flar can vapririze the planit or malt the nickl in lass than millasacit" -Bagara1000
"Happiness is just a Flaming Moe away."
Latinum Star Recipient; Hacker's Cross Award Winner
"one soler flar can vapririze the planit or malt the nickl in lass than millasacit" -Bagara1000
"Happiness is just a Flaming Moe away."
- Darth Servo
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 8805
- Joined: 2002-10-10 06:12pm
- Location: Satellite of Love
Its how he manages to sleep through the night.Thanatos wrote:Man, he really likes to spam his own comments section.
"everytime a person is born the Earth weighs just a little more."--DMJ on StarTrek.com
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com
"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com
"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
- Darth Servo
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 8805
- Joined: 2002-10-10 06:12pm
- Location: Satellite of Love
Sorry Darktard, but the half-dozen idiots at StarfleetJedi metaphorically sucking your dick doesn't constitute "getting laid".In his blog, Darkstar wrote:If you do that math, you ought to come to the correct conclusion that I'm doing just fine in the getting laid department, but I do thank you for your concern.
"everytime a person is born the Earth weighs just a little more."--DMJ on StarTrek.com
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com
"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com
"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
- harbringer
- Padawan Learner
- Posts: 479
- Joined: 2003-12-01 09:02am
- Location: Outreach - Lyran Alliance
- Contact:
You have to say one thing for darkstar he is a bust a gut comedian... the best part is he plays the "straight guy" so well you would think he had no idea he was such a gifted comedian. The bit where he boasts about getting girls is priceless I swear I nearly pissed myself. I mean how does some guy who has never been out of his basement for any reason other than work going to pull a girl? maybe a young woman sits in the same room as him at work and he counts work hours as time spent with a woman?. Well I just had my hysterical laughing fit of the week thanks darkstar your a true entertainer never let the spotlight drift hey ohh by the way say hi to mum.
"Depending on who you talk to, a mercenary can be anything from a savior to the scum of the universe. On the Wolf's Dragoons world of Outreach, the Mercenary's Star, we know what a merc really is - a business man." - Wolf's Dragoons, Outreach (Merc World mag. 3056)
I take a dim view of such pointless necromancy.
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