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Madonna can be made good simply by removing Madonna. Who knew?



Someone tell James Keenan that a ten year old girl have more massive pipes than his scrawny ass does. Again, who knew?



Same ten year old girl showing James LeBrie that he's a ginormous pansy as well.



AWESOMEBALL Ball III: The AWESOMEing. (Sub this guy, he is fucking magical)

Mr. Coffee wrote:


Someone tell James Keenan that a ten year old girl have more massive pipes than his scrawny ass does. Again, who knew?

I had completely forgotten about this cover. Thank you for returning me to the ways of AWESOME. Seriously, those kids fucking KILLED it.

A Dolly Parton song sung by a Canadian


Everyone thinks this is a Linda Ronstadt song. It's actually written by Emmylou Harris


And now for something completely different

Mr. Coffee wrote:Someone tell James Keenan that a ten year old girl have more massive pipes than his scrawny ass does. Again, who knew?

I've seen this, but she can't nail the angry vocals. Therefore, your statement is false.

JLTucker wrote:I've seen this, but she can't nail the angry vocals. Therefore, your statement is false.

Keenan couldn't summon up angry vocals if I was balls deep in his girlfriend while simultaneously drinking his last beer.

Mr. Coffee wrote:

JLTucker wrote:I've seen this, but she can't nail the angry vocals. Therefore, your statement is false.

Keenan couldn't summon up angry vocals if I was balls deep in his girlfriend while simultaneously drinking his last beer.

Oh, stop saying things we all know to not be true just to be provocative, Coffee.

J wrote:And now for something completely different

You just have to be different don't you? Well fine!

Lord Relvenous wrote:Oh, stop saying things we all know to not be true just to be provocative, Coffee.

Name one Tool song that Keenan convincingly sings angry. Just one.


Also, really digging the harps, Muse. Nice stuff.

Mr. Coffee wrote:

Lord Relvenous wrote:Oh, stop saying things we all know to not be true just to be provocative, Coffee.

Name one Tool song that Keenan convincingly sings angry. Just one.

Well, this is all subjective, and knowing your contratian streak I'm sure you'll disagree, but:

Mr. Coffee wrote:

Lord Relvenous wrote:Oh, stop saying things we all know to not be true just to be provocative, Coffee.

Name one Tool song that Keenan convincingly sings angry. Just one.

Hush, Cold and Ugly, Opiate, Bottom, Crawl Away, Flood, Forty Six & 2, Hooker with a Penis, The Grudge, Ticks and Leeches, and Jambi.

Nope, Keenan still sounds like he's whining to me about his day when he sings. It's the entire reason I hardly listen to Tool anymore. I honestly think Tool would be greatly improved if Keenan would just shut the hell up. I get it, Tucker is patterning his life around the story of Keenan, but I honestly can't stand the whiny bastard, so to each their own.

Now, that said, I'm finding the lack of actual covers on this page disturbing.



If you aren't aware of who Steel Panther is then you're probably a communist.

That's a pretty good cover, but it really only made me want to load up the original. It's like trying to cover "We're not Gonna Take it." You just can't do it better than the original.

While generally considered the original, no cover can come close to the Sinatra version of Fly me to the Moon:

Honestly, there's not much he's covered I don't vastly prefer over the original or any other attempts at a cover. Damn there are some terrible versions of this song.

Gotta agree with Coffee here, Lemmy singing a song about playing cards & gambling sounds more angry than Keenan ever could.



And fucking robots playing Motorhead. The programming that makes this happen boggles my mind, I used to work with mechatronics systems and this is fucking nuts.

Here's a cover of Sabbath Bloody Sabbath, by the Air Raid Siren himself in Ozzy's place. I respect Ozzy, but just this:



And to turn it around, here's the same ten-year-old girl from before storming Normandy:

So, we've had covers that are faithful to the original, we've had covers that are innovative and unusual... How about one that inspires sublime comic pathos from its sheer awfulness?

To that end, I give you famous British football player Paul Gascoigne covering a Lindesfarne song.

Banjo's can' be metal, right?


WRONG, MOTHERFUCKER! Ok, that was pretty fuckin' metal, despite being a hick instrument...

Ukulele's can't be metal for certain, right?



TRY AGAIN, MOTHERFUCKER! Fuck, that didn't work...

Surely the Cello cannot be metal, right? Right? That fucking big wooden shitbuicut can't be fucking metal. I mean, serio...



OH, GODDAMNIT! Is there anything you can't play metal on?

That's right.

Mr. Coffee wrote:Surely the Cello cannot be metal, right? Right? That fucking big wooden shitbuicut can't be fucking metal. I mean, serio...

[snip]

OH, GODDAMNIT! Is there anything you can't play metal on?

Cellos were always metal dude

phred wrote:Cellos were always metal dude

Well, duh. THey're basically midget upright basses. Not as rediculously fuckAWESOME as an actual upright bass...



But few things are. Especially when Pat's playing it...

Seriously, if you ever get a chance to see Horrorpops live drop whatever the fuck you are doing and go see them. Even if it's your wife giving birth to your first child, it's less important to your growth as a person than seeing Patrica Day spin a bass that's twice her size.

The Toasters' cover of Chuck Berry's "Johnny B. Goode," "Johnny Go Ska."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mvrEXTWhoc

She actually made me forget why I fucking hate it when people attempt to cover this song.

A couple old ones:



This one always sits with me because Nirvana fans, at least when I was growing up, were the worst of the worst. I finally caved when I found a song of Kobain's I could enjoy outside of a "this doesn't move me in one way or the other" sort of way (much like I feel about Nickelback and bands of that nature)... which was obviously because he didn't write it.


This one is cheating because no one cared about the original. But I'm posting it because Cash singing about flying a starship is worth listening to at least once in your life.

Man, I need to find some new music to listen to, but everything on the radio is so damned.... happy lately, and that doesn't jive with my 90s "life is terrible" grunge rock bullshit I had to grow up with.

Removing Madonna from Madonna, again.




Some dude covers R.E.M.

TheFeniX wrote:Man, I need to find some new music to listen to, but everything on the radio is so damned.... happy lately, and that doesn't jive with my 90s "life is terrible" grunge rock bullshit I had to grow up with.

Man, what do you want, music to slit your wrists to?
I used to listen to depressing music in my youth as well, some of it stuck with me, but these days I'm perfectly fine listening to happy music.

But if you want depressing music

Cowboy Junkies cover of a traditional song

Pharrel Williams, guy writes some of the catchiest dmn hooks in music, and most of his stuff is just plain feel-good music you could easily plan the mother of all roadtrips around. Yeah, I really dig his stuff. Especially this one song, maybe y'all heard it?



If this pops up on my radio on the way to work I can rest assured it'll be a good day. It's just that positive and uplifting a jingle. That said, the METAL will not be denied...



Holyshit, that drummer is sicker than an Ebloa patient, yo. Someone better grab a hammer, because he fucking nailed it!