Search found 3119 matches

by Raw Shark
2020-05-24 06:04pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

ME: Okay, next up are the demographic questions. "Other" and "Choose not to answer" are valid for most of these. OLD SOUTHERN LADY: Okay. ME: First off, what is your gender? OLD SOUTHERN LADY: Now what kind of question is that!? ME: I have to ask all of them as-written. Should I put "Choose not to a...
by Raw Shark
2020-05-21 05:52pm
Forum: News and Politics
Topic: Speaker Pelosi signals openness to Universal Basic Income.
Replies: 24
Views: 2771

Re: Speaker Pelosi signals openness to Universal Basic Income.

I think UBI is a nice idea in theory, but also that every landlord I've ever had would promptly and cheerfully raise the rent by whatever monthly amount is decided upon.
by Raw Shark
2020-05-17 08:54pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

ME: Thank you for calling the Division of Employment Security Helpline. How can I help you? TRAVEL AGENT: Uh, yeah, hi. I'm wondering about the status of my claim, it's been three weeks... ME: Sure, let me get your Social Security Number and I'll take a look. TRAVEL AGENT: Okay, it's XXX-XX-XXXX. ME...
by Raw Shark
2020-05-12 06:54pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

UBER DRIVER: I filed my unemployment claim six weeks ago, and I still haven't gotten my money! BITTER FORMER TAXI DRIVER: So it says here that you worked for Uber until a Pandemic-related layoff... Did you do something for them other than drive? UBER DRIVER: No, I'm a driver. I worked over forty hou...
by Raw Shark
2020-05-05 07:35pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Wildbow's PALE Discussion thread
Replies: 5
Views: 945

Re: Wildbow's Poof! Discussion thread

Ah, crap. That's two more years until I finish Ward, then.
by Raw Shark
2020-04-19 09:45pm
Forum: News and Politics
Topic: The Walls Come Down: No Travel Betwen US and Europe for 30 Days
Replies: 1779
Views: 95145

Re: The Walls Come Down: No Travel Betwen US and Europe for 30 Days

Texas, though, with major cities like Dallas, Houston, Austin... that just does not strike me as a good idea to let up on restrictions. On the other hand, Texas has a rather higher concentration of heavily armed shitkicking morons. At some point it's going to come down to deciding what the least ba...
by Raw Shark
2020-04-12 10:17pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: Signs of the Apocalypse
Replies: 9
Views: 2738

Re: Signs of the Apocalypse

Upping the dosage might have been a mistake. WHen you go back to work, you might crave it. My best boss ever, back at the first gas station, caught me burning down in the drink cooler red-handed about five times. He'd always take me in his office, have me close the door like I'm in trouble, and tel...
by Raw Shark
2020-04-09 02:15pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: Signs of the Apocalypse
Replies: 9
Views: 2738

Re: Signs of the Apocalypse

by Raw Shark
2020-01-29 11:01am
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

I was friendly with an incredibly organized group of technically homeless people in Denver, the Invisibles. I dated one of them for a while. They're crazy, but not necessarily incompetent.
by Raw Shark
2020-01-22 08:06pm
Forum: News and Politics
Topic: Gun-advocates threaten civil war to protect their guns.
Replies: 354
Views: 65367

Re: Gun-advocates threaten civil war to protect their guns.

Honestly, I'm more afraid of Australia itself than its gun-owners. The most deadly species of five types in the world is native there, not to mention the climate (which is a shitshow even when it's not actively on fire). Bill Bryson, in his book, In a Sunburned Country, wrote, "Make no mistake, my f...
by Raw Shark
2020-01-22 07:53pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: New Member Introductions
Replies: 400
Views: 234250

Re: New Member Introductions

miralasmani wrote:
2020-01-19 01:54pm
hello from indonesia
Do you prefer your left or right hand when you go fuck yourself?

Kidding. Welcome to our dysfunctional community. ;)
by Raw Shark
2020-01-10 11:30am
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: Ned Flanders - Themed Metal Band
Replies: 0
Views: 5149

Ned Flanders - Themed Metal Band

I can't make this shit up. Y'know, once in a while I get a reminder that out of ~7.5 Billion talking monkeys, I can't possibly be the most fucked-up one, no matter what kind of gonzo shit I do on the regular... https://getpocket.com/explore/item/they-started-a-ned-flanders-metal-band-then-the-simpso...
by Raw Shark
2019-12-31 01:01am
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

The homeless are a valuable asset. They have a lot of time on their hands, and will work for a sandwich or a safe place to sleep. Never discount them. They are your friends and allies.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-30 10:06am
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.
Replies: 25
Views: 7837

Re: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.

Kinda sounds like New Girl. "Yeah, I'm a shameless raging slut who can easily kill you. You want to make me apologize?"

I have been told told that my taste in women carries a little baggage.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-18 09:49pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

NEW CLIENT: I need you here in about 90 seconds.

ME: It's gonna take me 300.

NEW CLIENT: Make it happen. I'll pay what you're worth.

ME: Mister, you have bought a ride with the devil.

ME: ARE THERE GUNS OUT?

NEW CLIENT: Yeah.

ME: On my way.

Let nobody say that I don't earn my pay.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-14 03:59pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!
Replies: 580
Views: 105263

Re: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!

You're not going to hear me say this a lot, but Ralin is totally right.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-13 08:52pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.
Replies: 25
Views: 7837

Re: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.

Vendetta wrote:
2019-12-13 05:46pm
Kitty Pryde seems to be on a personal mission to cross off everyone named Peter in the entire universe.
Yeah, well. Like most of my exes, you can see right through her...
by Raw Shark
2019-12-13 04:39pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.
Replies: 25
Views: 7837

Re: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.

I thought it was kind of a running joke that Black Widow doesn't get her own movie because she's pretty much the village bicycle of Marvel... Y'know, always a feature in somebody else's story. Less of a running joke more of a contractual obligation with Scarlett Johansson. Her contract had her as s...
by Raw Shark
2019-12-11 07:55pm
Forum: News and Politics
Topic: Justice Department Inspector General rules Russia probe "justified and unbiased".
Replies: 37
Views: 4982

Re: Justice Department Inspector General rules Russia probe "justified and unbiased".

No, that was as I intended. Messy affairs happen. Real thing. Pretty sure that's what happened in the situation described in this article. At least (in my case) her husband isn't the Commander In Chief, so I've got that going for me, which is nice. [/Caddyshack]
by Raw Shark
2019-12-11 03:31pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.
Replies: 25
Views: 7837

Re: Marvel Studios' Black Widow - Official Teaser Trailer.

I thought it was kind of a running joke that Black Widow doesn't get her own movie because she's pretty much the village bicycle of Marvel... Y'know, always a feature in somebody else's story.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-11 03:21pm
Forum: News and Politics
Topic: Justice Department Inspector General rules Russia probe "justified and unbiased".
Replies: 37
Views: 4982

Re: Justice Department Inspector General rules Russia probe "justified and unbiased".

Well, I'm not exactly best friends with the husband of the married woman who I've been fucking lately. Pretty sure he wants to kill me. To be fair to her and myself, she told him she wanted a divorce before we slept together, but after we started talking, so I am not going to feel more than maybe 50...
by Raw Shark
2019-12-08 11:17pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!
Replies: 580
Views: 105263

Re: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!

She just left, when she wanted to. Fucked who she wanted. Did what she wanted. Loved the wrong guy, but not a bad guy. A lot like me.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-08 11:09pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!
Replies: 580
Views: 105263

Re: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!

Robert and Lyanna probably loved each other. They were teenagers. And she did... I mean, she was the knight of the laughing tree. Can't deny that.
by Raw Shark
2019-12-08 06:30pm
Forum: Fantasy
Topic: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!
Replies: 580
Views: 105263

Re: Game Of Thrones: Final Season --SPOILERS!

"When a Targaryen is born, the gods flip a coin," was established early on in the books and maintained throughout, especially in the prequel material. Probably the inbreeding. About half of them are as crazy as a shithouse rat. When that Targaryen is subjected to many experiences that would cause P...
by Raw Shark
2019-12-05 01:18pm
Forum: Off-Topic
Topic: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Replies: 712
Views: 203533

Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines

RAW SHARK PULLS OVER TO ANSWER A TEXT MESSAGE DURING RUSH HOUR: RANDOM DUDE IN A SUIT: Are you my Uber? I'm [first name]. YOUR DRIVER: Don't call me that. I drove a real cab, not a clown car. RANDOM DUDE IN A SUIT: Look, my Uber is late and I've got half an hour to get to Logan. I'll give you a hund...